How much input to you let your kids have on where they go to school?

[Anonymous]

I know there will be strong opinions on this. Background: dd was in public K in one cit for K and 1. Moved to another city for 2 (public), school was a terrible fit in all ways. Moved to another public school for 3rd, is a better f fit. After 1st week, we got call that there was space at a public Montessori we wait listed her for. We told her tonight it was an option and she just looked really sad. I might even say devestated. "I want to stay at X. I have a friend there. I don't want to move." I feel so bad for the poor kid. We are supposed to go on a tour tomorrow. Should we just forget it? I think it would be different if she hadn't already bounced around so much.

[Anonymous]

Bouncing her around school to school is not a good idea. That's not fair to her. If she is doing well, leave her there. I wouldn't put a kid in Montessori who has been in public two years.

[Anonymous]

Personally I would probably go on the tour and tell her that it's just to see it and then if you didn't feel strongly adter the tour let her decide.

[Anonymous]

If the public school she's in is satisfactory to you and she's happy, then I would leave her there.

To answer your question, I do give weight to my child's opinion on school but I do what I feel is best in the end. Kids almost never want to change schools bc it's scary!

[Anonymous]

wow, that is a lot of moving around at her age. Seems a bit unfair to not let her have a say when you are moving each year.

[Anonymous]

Starting Montessori at third grade seems like it would be tough. The tools are very specific.

[Anonymous]

I give them zero choice. Hell, even college isn't totally their choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Starting Montessori at third grade seems like it would be tough. The tools are very specific.

Yes. Unless she has Montesorri background I'd be inclined to leave her where she is.

[Anonymous]

If there is any chance you may move her again take the tour. If the Montessori school would be a better fit take the tour. Then you can talk about it. As a Montessori mom I do agree that coming in at 3rd with no prior Montessori is not ideal.

[Anonymous]

I went to five elementary schools. Please don't move your child again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to five elementary schools. Please don't move your child again.

I went to three and even that sucked. I still really hate being new to any group although I'm generally open to meeting new people. I just really dread being the person who doesn't know all the rules and traditions.

[Anonymous]

Thanks, everyone.

[Anonymous]

Do the tour if you want, but then I think you need to let her be the deciding vote here. I went to three different elementary schools as a kid because my parents moved around, and I HATED it. I've done everything in my power to make sure my daughter doesn't have to switch.

I will have her test for TJ HS, and she will get to be the deciding vote if she gets in. (our home school is great and 1/2 a mile away, so we'd be fine either way.)

[Anonymous]

DS is in 3rd grade in a dual language program at one elementary and DD just started K at a different elementary with a technology magnet program. We wanted DS to move this year so that they would be at the same school, but he really didn't want to leave his friends so we compromised that he could stay at his school for this year and then move. Our local district requires that a student attend the technology elementary magnet for 4th and 5th grades to get lottery preference into the middle school and he really wants to go to that middle school so he was willing to leave his current school next year for that reason but not before.

I didn't want to force the issue this year since he felt strongly about not moving now and was happy to compromise with next year. It also helps me to have heard good things about his teachers for this year in the current school. The past few years haven't been great but hopefully it should be better this year which made the decision to stay for 3rd grade a bit easier.

[Anonymous]

So we did the tour this a.m., and my daughter liked the school. She's at her other elementary school now. It's her 2nd week (though she was out a couple days this week bc of strep) at that elementary school.

I hate that we've moved he this much. I worry about it.

And now I'm afraid that I've introduced into her mind that there might be a better school -- if she stays where she is , she might have a nagging feeling that she'd be happier at the other. If we move her, she might want to go back to her current school, and she won't be able to (we tranferred her there). She might find out that she doesn't like Montessori method or the learning curve to figure out the materials is too steep. She did do Montessori in PreK, but she doesn't really remember it.

More of the back story is that we knew we wanted to move her after 2nd (and she agreed, there were a lot of issues with that school), so we put her on a waiting list for the Montessori but were told in the spring that there was a very, very low chance she would get a spot. So we enrolled her in another school and were excited about it, then I got a phone call about the Montessori out of the blue after the first week -- it's a public, lottery-selection Montessori. Maybe I shouldn't have even looked into it.