Dating while separated

[Anonymous]

Has anyone done this? Not hooking up, just getting to know another person to see if you might hit it off, with the intention of disclosing to the person you might go on a date with that you are separated and just in the waiting period before the divorce is final. The water seems murky...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone done this? Not hooking up, just getting to know another person to see if you might hit it off, with the intention of disclosing to the person you might go on a date with that you are separated and just in the waiting period before the divorce is final. The water seems murky...

Why wouldn't you?

[Anonymous]

My ex went on match the day he moved out. Divorce too 15 more months during which he had 2 serious relationships. It's mean-spirited but then so is he.

[Anonymous]

Of course.

[Anonymous]

too = took

[Anonymous]

I think you time is better spent really focusing on you . Therapy if needed.

Not trying to line up #2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you time is better spent really focusing on you . Therapy if needed.

Not trying to line up #2

I'm not trying to line up #2. I was very isolated so am really just trying to make new friends.

[Anonymous]

Sure, just be honest. There are tons of separated people who want to date.

[Anonymous]

I think if someone has been through an awful marriage and is separated, there is a place for meeting new people as long as you are honest before you even go out. There is nothing wrong with telling someone that you are separated but like intelligent conversation with an adult.

[Anonymous]

Are you female OP? I think i'm general people should do what they want and that includes dating while separated. But especially when they are women who want to have kid(s). I was separated at 36 (no kids) to a narcissistic gaslighter. I worked on myself and started dating. found my DH and now have two wonderful kids and the sweetest family. Tick tock, Don't stop.

[Anonymous]

OP, have you and your spouse discussed the idea of dating other people? Do you have kids? Things can be murky if there are children involved and how your spouse may or may not feel about that. Also, is there any chance of reconciling with your spouse, or you both are just waiting for the time to past to file?

[Anonymous]

Just don't introduce anyone to the kids......for years.....honestly.

[Anonymous]

Recently separated woman/mom here. I wouldn't date you. I wouldn't date me, either.

Unless you were only married for a matter of months, you need to take some time for yourself and unpack what went wrong, what role you played in it, what you want for your future and how to improve yourself so that's more likely.

If you're truly just lonely and looking to make friends, make friends with people you don't want to date (i.e. aim away from your gender/demographic of choice).

If you can't be alone while the ink dries on your divorce, you need to look at yourself and figure out why.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just don't introduce anyone to the kids......for years.....honestly.

+1000

If you have kids, your job is to stabilize their life. Adding new people isn't a good way to do this.

[Anonymous]

I waited until we actually filed for divorce. I agree with many of the reasons pps have give for not dating while separated. For me, a big reason was that I didn't think there was any way to explain that situation without sounding shady, and I didn't think the kind of people who would be open to dating me after hearing that story would be the kind of people I needed in my life.