Toddler Daycare or wait for 2.9 yr old Pre-K?

[Anonymous]

I am trying to decide on what do with our toddler. She is about to turn 2 and we have had her at home with a combo of a nanny 3 days a week; my mom 1 day and my husband/I on Fridays. Since she loves music and activities we wanted to put her in a more social setting - she already does a ton of story times at the library, music classes and play dates - but I figured a daycare setting is "all-inclusive" - gives us the social activities and childcare all in one.

We enrolled her at Bright Horizons in the late spring and she did great the 1st two weeks than had horrible meltdowns the 3rd week - crying on and off, throwing up and just really upset. I ended up having to travel for work the following week and we had family coming into town for an extended time with young kids - so she was in good hands (I work from home, making it easier as well). So we decided to give her a break from daycare and I am now trying to figure out what to do in August when we need childcare once again.

I am pregnant with Baby #2 due in December and then will have 5 months off (Maternity Leave and Unpaid Leave). I am debating whether its worth trying for a nother 2 - 3 day daycare program or since I'll be at home with the baby just stay home with both kids and wait til she is almost 2.9 to start her in a more preschool like settings - 2/3 days mornings.

It was such a traumatic experience I am scared to put her back in - she has cried leaving me before with the nanny and others - but calms down and I always pick her up happy. But to pick up a puffy eyed crying toddler after a full day - it just gutted me.

So - I'm thinking - is it worth it to go through the transition again - or should I just try to make it work til she is 3 and in a pre-school type setting (9-1, 2-3 days a week)?

[Anonymous]

Do you need her to be at a center to get an infant spot via sibling preference? Not sure that'd be reason to do it, but it might need to be a consideration.

[Anonymous]

Could you do a part time day program for her - a toddler class or something like that? Once the baby is here it would be good for her to be engaged in something to give you some time with the baby and her some time independently with her age group.

[Anonymous]

Agree with above poster - think about what you may want to do with sibling for childcare. Seems far away since you are pregnant but very soon you will have think about what to do with 2. Many find the cost of 2 in daycare to be quite high - so opt for family centers or nanny. Even if you do work part-time you will need some kind of childcare support - so perhaps finding a solution that works for the short term but more importantly for when you are back at work after baby #2 and having to figure out both kids.

[Anonymous]

Would the toddler program you put her in transition to a pre-K or would you switch again? If its just a one year program and you will do a different 3 and 4 year old program, maybe wait it out that extra year?

[Anonymous]

Perhaps a home day care would give you more flexibility

[Anonymous]

We will be in this exact situation,'although my daughter is 14 months. She is with my mom exclusively during the day, with storytimes, play dates, and loves music! #2 is not going to daycare, so the sibling spit isn't a concern. We are looking at a toddler class at primrose, and transition to preschool at 3, or wait and go straight to preschool. We talked to our ped, and she said she is getting the social interaction, so don't feel pressured to put her in a toddler room.

[Anonymous]

Nanny. 2 is still really young.

[Anonymous]

She may have just had a bad week - maybe she was feeling under the weather or something. I don't think I'd completely abandon the idea of daycare or a center because of one bad week. Especially since you might need a solution for two kids at some point soon.

The age you are at right now is a really tough one for transitions, by the way.

[Anonymous]

I'd wait.

Not because I think that daycare at 2 is a bad thing. My kid thrived in his 2 year old class at daycare, but because it seems like you have something that's working for you, and you've got some other big transitions coming up. Also, financially, it doesn't seem to make a lot of sense to pay for a daycare slot if you're going to be home for 5 months, and going to daycare and then bringing her back home for your maternity leave is a lot of transitions.