My middle school DC "threw up" (maybe) again at school
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Anonymous
| I put air quotes there because it wasn't witnessed by anyone and she just told the nurse, who called us to get her. This has happened 3 or 4 times this spring and DC knows it's a way to come home when anxious or worried about something. DC has significant anxiety and is in therapy and on meds, although we are still struggling in many ways. If he feels in any manner not well, i.e., headache, stomach ache, sore throat, whatever, she thinks she is sick and needs to come home. She knows that "throwing up" is the ticket. Therapist has worked with DC to explain the difference between actual sickness (fever, vomiting, etc) and the way that anxiety can cause the body to exhibit these symptoms and how DC can press forward knowing that nothing bad will happen beyond feeling miserable, which of course sucks. DC does not have a 504 or IEP because in spite of his anxiety and OCD, enjoys school and is an A student (which he pushes himself to maintain and we don't in any way stress). Maybe a 504 or IEP would help, if she would even qualify, but so far the school has been very accommodating without it. I just feel like my kid is the only one in our circle of friends who is dealing with this and wonder if others have any experience and/or words of encouragement. |
Anonymous
| Pick a pronoun already! That post was confusing. |
Anonymous
Seriously. I think you may be passim the anxiety down. |
Anonymous
| That was frustrating to read due to pronouns. Ugh! I think your anxiety is right there with your it's anxiety. |
Anonymous
| OP here. Sorry, don't know why I did that. Pronouns (and my anxiety) aside, I am concerned that DC feels so anxious that she becomes sick and has to leave school. Just wondering if others have dealt with this and how. |
Anonymous
|
Talk to the therapist, but maybe it would be helpful for her to keep a log of her days and see if a pattern emerges -- e.g. she feels unwell before quizzes, or after a teacher yells at another student or something.
Maybe there are no root causes for her anxiety but i'd want to rule that out. |
Anonymous
| My DC is very much like this. Are the meds working well enough? Maybe a higher dose is needed. This is our first school year ever where there have been no missed days or early dismissals due to things like this. What is your in school plan for an anxiety attack? (We had a little notebook with calming strategies, a place where DC could go and calm down and a free pass to leave the classroom when necessary.) |
Anonymous
Those weren't air quotes. They were actual quotation marks.. |
Anonymous
The issue is called school avoidance, and we dealt with it more in the mornings in the form of giant fits, but it's the same anxiety based issue. If it's happening for your kid mostly once they're AT school, really you shoudl press for a 504 plan. You can get school-based therapy to help the child with coping mechanisms. Also they can do an FBA to see if there is a pattern for when this avoidance behaviors occurs. Maybe it's math tests, or gym class, or a particular substitute teacher. |
Anonymous
| This was me in middle school. I was being horribly bullied and didn't tell anyone about it. When it would happen I would fake vomiting so I could go home. Might be worth exploring. |
Anonymous
OP here, thanks. Yes, he says he is so stressed about PARCC tests. Upsets me a great deal that a 7th grader is so stressed already. He doesn't have a 504, but has an understanding with guidance counselor that he can leave class at any time to take a breather if he needs to. I didn't know that "school-based therapy to help the child with coping mechanisms" exists. What might that look like? |
Anonymous
| Lol, you switched pronouns again. You first chose your dc to be a girl and now she has morphed into a boy! Sorry, I know you're going through a lot, but this is funny. |
Anonymous
|
Yeah, I did similar things in middle school. Later in high school, I would sob on the way to school and beg my mom not to make me go. In hindsight, I should have been seeing a psychiatrist and therapist, it would have prevented a lot more serious issues down the road.
I wasn't bullied & I had friends, but I had untreated anxiety and depression. I don't know if getting your kid officially labeled with a 504, etc. in middle school is a helpful thing or not. Have you explained to the nurse about your daughter's anxiety, her therapy, etc and that you don't think she's actually vomiting or physically ill? |
Anonymous
NP - My DC did the same during a miserable stint at a punitive middle school. DC was always throwing up, had a sore throat, was sick, had flu, had headaches. We moved DC a new school and DC became a new child . . . and has never once had the school nurse call me in the last five years to come home. |
Anonymous
My brother used to do that. My mom would tell him that she was NOT going to pick up until the end of the school day and if he was too sick to go to class, rest in the nurse's office. That stopped that. He did it one more time and then quit. |