High anxiety about sleeping out

[Anonymous]

My middle school child has severe anxiety about sleeping out (among other things) and is in therapy and on meds. Our therapist believes that we need to encourage her with short sleepovers, so she just headed to her grandparents to sleep tonight. She was anxious and in tears before going. I believe it was right to send her as she needs to do it more to get used to it and yet I'm sick to my stomach about the whole thing. I worry that she'll never be comfortable sleeping out. Need less to say I also suffer from some anxiety. Hoping for some supportive words.

[Anonymous]

Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure her grandparents will do everything right to comfort her and help her feel safe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hang in there.

+1

Eventually, she'll realize the dread and anxiety she feels beforehand will lessen b/c she realizes it wasn't all that bad.

[Anonymous]

Why does she need to sleep other places? I hated it as a kid (gave me anxiety too) so I just opted not to do it often. My anxiety was severe enough that I skipped outdoor Ed and high school retreats (or went for the day part, mom picked me up and took me back in morning). I'm a perfectly functional adult with no regrets. I will travel now, but also just really enjoy being at home in my own bed! Does she get upset if she just skips sleepovers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does she need to sleep other places? I hated it as a kid (gave me anxiety too) so I just opted not to do it often. My anxiety was severe enough that I skipped outdoor Ed and high school retreats (or went for the day part, mom picked me up and took me back in morning). I'm a perfectly functional adult with no regrets. I will travel now, but also just really enjoy being at home in my own bed! Does she get upset if she just skips sleepovers?

Just curious, did you go away for college and if so, any problems adjusting?

[Anonymous]

I'm also not a fan of sleep overs. I didn't like them as a kid (and wasn't allowed to do any until I was 11 or so), and was basically a home body.
I had no trouble at college, and have lived all over the world, FYI, so this was merely a childhood thing.
I don't like this movement toward sleep overs...at my child's school, kids do sleep overs in K...that's too young.

[Anonymous]

How old?

[Anonymous]

12

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does she need to sleep other places? I hated it as a kid (gave me anxiety too) so I just opted not to do it often. My anxiety was severe enough that I skipped outdoor Ed and high school retreats (or went for the day part, mom picked me up and took me back in morning). I'm a perfectly functional adult with no regrets. I will travel now, but also just really enjoy being at home in my own bed! Does she get upset if she just skips sleepovers?

Just curious, did you go away for college and if so, any problems adjusting?

I'm the previous PP. I'm from DC and went to college in the Midwest. I did fine. I talked to my family often and generally came home a little more often then my classmates (for example, I would usually come home a weekend in Feb since we didn't have any school breaks) and my parents came out some (my dad traveled for work so they could often tack it on to his business trips for a weekend). I did a semester abroad which was really hard with home sickness.

My sister didn't really like sleepovers either (but did a few more than me). She had a very similar college experience to mine (except she went south). But she didn't do a semester abroad.

We both like traveling now but also like getting home! Our family is still really close. My family and my sister's family and our parents live within about 5 miles of each other.