Long commute vs short commute, bad job

[Anonymous]

Pay is the same and is good.

A. Long commute (1 hour door to door on a bus), interesting job, opportunities for advancement, friends work there. More of a program role. 3 days a week telework

B. Short, 5 minute commute, boring, dead end job, very unfriendly coworkers. More of an admin role (hate that). No telework.

I am just really struggling with making my commute longer. We plan on having children in the next year. Job A is perfect for me now. I miss working downtown and I miss the friendly atmosphere. I just am very worried that with a baby I won't care about my dead end job and will wish for the shorter commute. A part of me feels like I'm dying here though, and that the short commute is handcuffing me. Any thoughts? I have the job offer in hand and it's keeping me up at night. They actually created the job offer just for me and have begged me to work there.

[Anonymous]

This is a tough decision but if you have the option to work from home 3 days, I will pick the long commute, but this is just me. Even though you have a short commute now but the additional stress and nonsense from coworkers will deplete you of energy pretty quickly.

[Anonymous]

Definitely long commute. Too many pros to overlook!

[Anonymous]

That is a tough one. I found there were several things I felt completely differently about once I had my first child, things that nobody could tell me I would ever change my mind about. Your short commute is a total of 50 minutes a week. Your long commute, even jut two days a week, is a total of 240 minutes. That is a significant difference, in my opinion. I think you're smart to recognize that will matter more to you once you have a child. That said, if you're a year or more from having a child, I'd probably go for the longer commute but better job. Who knows how long it will take before you have a baby. A year + is a long time to be in a job with no growth potential. Other opportunites you are not thinking of may come along in the new job. Either way, good luck!

[Anonymous]

A for sure!

[Anonymous]

I just don't think your 'long commute' option sounds bad since it is only 2 days per week. I would choose the long commute option.

[Anonymous]

The three days a week of telework makes A the more palatable option. Build up a good reputation there to get more flexibility when kids come. And don't underestimate what having a job you enjoy means when kids come--if you leave your baby to go somewhere you hate every day, that's a terrible blow to your mental health.

[Anonymous]

Come on, you won't even be driving 1 hour. You'll be able to read or even check/answer emails while commuting.
Take the job.

[Anonymous]

Definitely A. PPs have made good points - you don't even know for sure when you'll have a baby. And some parents have an hour commute 4-5 times/week.

Telework is also a perk - you can get little things done around the house when you take a break from work. Even with a 5 minute commute, you won't have that opportunity during the day.

Finally, I've found that I can start to resent my job when I'm not challenged and interested. I think, "Why am I wasting my time here when I could be home with my baby?" If you're busy and excited about work, it makes the time away from your child more worthwhile.

[Anonymous]

How flexible job B is? Short commute is definitely a plus with kids, but more important is flexibility.
I had short commute when my twins were born, I used to go home to feed my kids during lunch instead of pumping. Very convenient. But it was dead end job, so once kids got older - I quit for more promising position with longer commute.

In your situation - I would pick A - child is just planned (you don't know how long it would take), 3 days telecommute is awesome, and great coworkers are a must for your mental health (it is quite important during postpartum, ask me how I know )

[Anonymous]

1 hour on a bus, now switching? FFS, A.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I meant to say that we plan on having children this year, not next. New job has been very accommodating even knowing I'm pregnant. Hopefully I will be busy and excited about the new job, but you never really know until you're there. I wish I could test drive it a few times. I was excited about my current job and it's been bad since day 1.

I have had an hour commute daily in the past and maybe that's why I'm hesitating. Hopefully the telework will negate that.

With my current commute, I have the ability to go home for lunch daily and I also run most of my errands (Target, Costco, grocery) and that's been useful.

[Anonymous]

A for sure. I have an hour long commute and 2 young kids (with no telework option.)

I would much rather commute for 2 hrs a day twice a week (hell, I would do 5 days/week) to a job I really enjoy, that 10m a day to a job I dread.

[Anonymous]

I would take A hands down. I would hate to wake up in the morning if I had to go to job #2. Also, you basically go 2 per week and rest can work at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just don't think your 'long commute' option sounds bad since it is only 2 days per week. I would choose the long commute option.

+1 for sure.