Come here if your in laws do weird crap at thanksgiving.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:My MIL clicks her dentures habitually, will leave her stuff all over the house and yell at the kids for messing with it (2 and 4), and is antisemitic and goes off on related diatribes.

You let an antisemitic person stay under your roof and interact with your children when she actually says antisemetic things in your home? Guess what that makes you?

Someone who is trying to negotiate complex relationships?

You teach your kids that it is a “complex” matter to make it plain that you will not have anyone say antisemitic things in your presence? If someone said something like that in my home, they would be given one opportunity to apologize to all who were in earshot and vow never to say it again. If they did not take that opportunity, or if they said anything else of the kind, they would be escorted out and they would not be welcome in my home again, ever. If they apologized profusely I would consider meeting with them elsewhere, maybe.

DP here. What if it’s your husband’s mother and he didn’t agree with you. You’ll throw down the gauntlet and ask for a divorce?

I didn’t marry someone who is OK with antisemitism, so that’s not a problem. She would be asked to leave, and she wouldn’t be back in our home. Period. If you are antisemitic, or tolerate antisemitism in your home, that’s on you. That’s not how it goes in our house.

I like to just say “you sound very antisemitic.” That way your kids know what’s up and you don’t have throw anyone out.

My MIL is racist (she’s old and from another country), and I say “that’s a very racist thing to say.” But hell no am I going to kick my 80 year old MIL out on a holiday. You need to be able to shut down conversation and talk about other things.