7 year old girl, occasional emotional breakdowns, normal?

[Anonymous]

Dd is 7. Normally a happy, silly, confident girl. Every few months though she will have a few days of being in a funk. Tonight she broke down crying. Her random string of thoughts during the meltdown all referenced what she sees as her short comings compared to others. We have always told her that we love her regardless of her grades, etc. we praise effort over grades, persistence over product, kindness and grace above all. Basically we try to make sure she knows that our love is unconditional.
Is there something we're missing?
Is this typical 7 year old?
Any advice/insight?

[Anonymous]

She sounds like a wonderful kid. Totally normal.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like a wonderful and totally normal kid.

When she has her breakdowns/moments of self doubt, try to take her seriously and help her problem solve. Also, try to see if there's a pattern -- a particular friend who makes her anxious; a school project that gets her down; a teacher who gives her bad vibe. That's really all you can do. Help her be resilient.

[Anonymous]

My son does that if we haven't kept him on a good sleep schedule. Daily stresses that he usually can handle just seem too big at times.

But I think everyone gets overwhelmed occasionally.

I comfort and console. Then if there is something that needs actual problem solving rather than just a vent, I help him figure out a solution. It's best to have them brain storm solutions first. Makes them gain the confidence to do it solo.

[Anonymous]

I agree that it sounds normal. You can start teaching her skills that will help like evaluating the situation critically to see if her worries/anxiety about it is in proportion to reality, don't catastrophize or extrapolate, do some positive self-talk, replace nagging worried thoughts with something happier, and personify her worry (or self doubt) and talk about how she is stronger than it. (Draw a picture of it, give it a name and then tear up the picture, or have her draw herself even bigger with a superhero cape defeating Wanda the Worries, eg.)

Also validate her feelings without validating the content of them. "I can see how upset you are about this." not "You have nothing to worry about!"

[Anonymous]

My almost 7 DD occasionally has crying meltdowns when she's very tired. So I don't find meltdowns abnormal, but I do find it odd that your DD is analyzing her shortcomings. What kind of shortcomings can you have at the edge of 7?

[Anonymous]

My DD has had similar emotional breakdowns. It normal for children, especially girls, to feel things strongly and emotionally as they grow. She is learning about the world and her place in it. It can be overwhelming and confusing at times. Remember, our children don't have the same life experiences to deal with challenges/changes they are experiencing. You know your daughter best. Sounds like you are offering her love and support which is the most important thing. Here is an article you might find helpful, http://bit.ly/1NmqVlu !

[Anonymous]

Normal. It sounds like all the worries and insecurities that she normally pushes away bubble over the surface.

[Anonymous]

I have a 7 year-old girl and echo everything in this thread. Totally normal, but also try more sleep.

[Anonymous]

People are very different: a weirdo, with different personalities and needs. Not all people are moderate and calm. But each person has talents, special positive features. She sounds like a wonderful kid. Totally normal !)

[Anonymous]

Op here: thanks everyone!!