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Working moms (who work outside the home)
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Anonymous
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Are any of you working so that you can have a boat?
On may of the mommy boards I'm on, people often talk about moms who work out of the home are selfishly working so they can have "a fancy car, fancy house, and BOAT." They always throw a boat in there. I don't know a single person who owns a boat, much less a woman who is working solely to get that boat. I don't know why, but this concept drives me nuts! |
zumbamama
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I work and have a boat. I didn't spend thousands of dollars on it though and it was never my big goal to own one on my very modest salary...it was more of a fixer upper project for DH. It only cost $500 off craigslist, and took 2 summers to fix it. It is a blast taking it out on the Chesapeake.
I don't know anyone personally in DC who owns a boat. But when I visit MIL on the Chesapeake, most people there have a boat...ranging from super expensive to super cheap. I also have a paddle boat and three kayaks, but they are not fancy at all...we just like the water! |
Anonymous
| I know women who work primarily to pay for private school...not boats |
Anonymous
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I grew up here and many people have (small) boats. There's tons of water here -- great rivers and bays -- so I think boats are a natural.
Having said that, I also don't know anyone who works for a boat. |
Anonymous
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This topic is so frustrating to me. It implies that women who work are harming their children. (Not that you are implying that OP, just the whole topic of having to justify what you work for).
I work on a reduced hours schedule for half our income. We make less than $150,000 per year so I feel like it is a necessity. But even if it wasn't, as long as I am doing what is best for my family I don't see why people would judge. We both have really reasonable jobs and commutes, and a fantastic situation for our child in terms of day-to-day care, and we are really able to minimize the time she spends away from either parent during the week. And when she is away from us she is well taken care of. If we were in a situation where we both worked long hours and had bad commutes, we would move. Simple as that. Family comes first. Luckily we don't have to do that at this point in our lives, and we both really love our jobs. We are working to pay for our house, with a yard, and enough room for one more child we will hopefully have one day, and to be able to live close-in, in a nice neighborhood, with decent public schools, and to be able to retire one day, and send our kids to college, and buy organic produce when we want, and splurge on a weekend away for our 5 year anniversary, and have good health insurance, and not worry about every Starbucks drink we buy, etc. We are not working for a boat, or a large house, or a summer home, or even 2 cars (we have one). But for those of you who are, if your kids are happy and you are too, more power to you. |
Anonymous
| I have a friend who has a house in Arlington,2 luxury cars, a summer home and a boat. It is frustrating because she just wants more and more. A newer bigger house, car, etc..She consistenly talks about it...when is enough ever really enough? |
Anonymous
| I have a kayak, does that make me materialistic and evil? It wasn't very expensive and it is stored in the garage so no ongoing storage and maintenance costs. |
Anonymous
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I work part-time. The reason I continue to work versus SAHM is that for good health insurance and to ensure that we can pay our mortgage and hopefully keep up with house maintenance.
My financial aspirations are to some day own two cars that aren't 10 years old. We would one day like to finish our basement, but that goal seems to just get further and further away (looks like new pipes will come next, I wonder what will break next). No boat in sight. |
Anonymous
| No boat or German car here. Decent house but I wouldn't call it fancy. The two biggest drains on my salary are private school and nanny. I sat down last night and realized that between nanny, babysitters and cleaning person, our employee costs exceed our mortgage. Our nanny and cleaning person are good and one of them has been with us for years, so how can I cut there? |
Anonymous
| I work so that we can pay our mortgage. I also enjoy working. Is that okay? |
Anonymous
| OP, it is getting soooo tedious to see all of these varieties of "justify why you work" directed at WOHMs. Can't you just accept that some people have different priorities, from one another, from you, and that their children can turn out healthy, happy, and well-adjusted? Does every WOHM need to justify why they are doing it? So the f*ck what if they're working for a boat, a car, a lemonade stand, a college education for their kid, to pay the mortgage, to pay for weekly massages, to pay for a prom dress for their kid, to get self esteem, to show kids moms can work too, to make ends meet, to get adult interaction, to make that college education one paid for worth it, to pay of student loans, or just to reflect their own unique principals and priorities? Seriously, why is it your business? |
Anonymous
I think everyone on this thread is with you - we have all posted that we are in the same boat (pardon the pun considering the start of this thread). So I would say we think it's okay. But there are many judgmental folks (or more than likely, maybe just one or two) who have posted on DCUM that would say, no, this isn't okay. You don't love your kids enough because if you did you would sell your house and move to an apartment two hours away so you won't have to work. I think that is the OP's point - that most people have to work or don't have to work, but work for a mortgage or some extra funds, not for things like a boat. Either way, if you want to get defensive about working you need to pull up the Dr. Laura thread from a while back - cause on this thread you are preachin' to the choir. 
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Anonymous
I'm not the particular PP you are talking to, but I think you're missing the point. PP seems to be making two points. First, she personally works for her mortgage. But the "is that okay" seems, to me, to be a well-aimed jab at OP's original intent, which appears to set herself up as the arbitrator of what is and is not justification for work. I personally think it's none of OP's business if someone is working to pay for a boat or working to feed their yard gnome collecting hobby. We all have hobbies and priorities that are the business of our own families and nobody else. To each her own, right? You, however, seem to agree with OP that working for mortgage or extra funds is okay, but working to pay for something like a boat is not okay. Why not? Actually, no need to answer -- I don't really care why you don't think it's ok. |
Anonymous
| Yawn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The WM vs SAHM thing is so tired. Get a new debate. |
Anonymous
I´d love to have a boat! It´s true that this area is great for having a boat. My question is, where do you keep it? Even though it might be possible finding a cheap boat off craigslist, doesn´t it cost money to park it somewhere? Just curious, as I´d really love to start looking into buying a cheap boat, if it didn´t cost too much money (or stress) to maintain it. |