braking ties with siblings

[Anonymous]

did anyone break ties with a sibling?

why?

will you ever make up?

do you miss him/her?

[Anonymous]

don't break ties but take many breaks.
siblings always comes back someone had told me once and that has been the case, friends not so much!

[Anonymous]

I miss what he used to be. He married a woman who comes from a wealthy family and is somewhat snobby and my brother became really obnoxious in his effort to be "classy" I think. I like the SIL better than him.

We didn't have a fight - I just don't enjoy his company.

[Anonymous]

I broke away from my brother because he was physically and verbally abusive towards me when we were kids, including sexual harassment but not abuse because I said no and told everybody about it.

I forgave him later because DH said that he was just an adolescent. Bad choice: he showed aggression toward my infant out of jealousy. DH and I immediately cut him off.

Learn from my mistake, everybody! Forgive from a distance, but don't act as if nothing happened. Keep abusers out of your life and your childrens' lives.

[Anonymous]

^^
sorry: children's

[Anonymous]

Yes - my brother. I have sisters that I get along very easily with, and who mean the world to me.

Why? Because he's an angry, highly manipulative, unkind, selfish human being.

No. I cannot imagine ever trusting him again. Also lost near total respect for him.

No. I miss the idea of a great brother. In actuality, that person does not exist. I do not miss who he really is.

[Anonymous]

My brother is schizophrenic and unavailable for family relationships. It's a mutual choice. Or rather, my siblings and I are making a choice to protect ourselves and our families from his anger/outbursts of chaos and violence, paranoia, delusions of grandeur. My brother is choosing to not undergo treatment even if it costs him his parents, siblings, nieces, and nephews. He feels like homelessness is a valid lifestyle and we owe him money for ill-defined and unfounded wrongs we did him as kids. It violates his pride and sense of right/wrong to interact with us if we can't pay up or draw the line at inviting an unbathed adult in filthy clothing to a grade-schooler's soccer game.

[Anonymous]

Interesting how all of the above concern estrangement with brothers.

[Anonymous]

That is interesting.

I do know someone with an estranged sister, but it was a secret sibling situation and they never had a healthy relationship. The final straw was over dealing with the parents' hoarder house after my friend's mother died. My friend's father left only a token acknowledgement in his will for his wrong side of blanket daughter. After het stepmother(?) died, the sister offered to help my friend clean out the hoarded house, but she was just looking for valuables she felt entitled to. She also started a blog with photos of the hoard and the real names of my friend and her parents.

[Anonymous]

I broke off ties with my sister. Sadly enough I was not the first and will probably not be the last to do so with her. She is a narcissist like my parents and thrives on attention. She repeatedly told lies about my husband (first she claimed he threw something at her, this is untrue- I was there as were two other eyewitnesses), and at this point she claims that he hit her. Thankfully my other sister was there and has pointed out to everyone that this is totally false. In retaliation, she did not invite him to her wedding until my mother made her (we were not aware of this until later), and then made sure there were no photographs taken of him or our children. She has made comments about our children that are too cruel to repeat here, but it is true that my son has special needs. She did something very similar to my sister- even accusing her husband of stealing from her (this is a total lie and she has never been able to prove it). She's made cruel comments about my sister's infertility as well. She's an awful person and has no one in her life- even her long-suffering husband barely sees her (he moved an hour away "for his job"). I feel really bad for her because it is obvious she needs some sort of help, but she's unwilling to seek any. At this point she is like a pot that is so hot she will burn anyone who goes near her. As a result, my siblings and I have cut her off entirely. My parents continue to enable we behavior, and they're her only friends in the world. Everyone else is gone and she's not yet 30.

I have no anger towards her, but just think cutting her off is the best for me and my family. It's sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I broke off ties with my sister. Sadly enough I was not the first and will probably not be the last to do so with her. She is a narcissist like my parents and thrives on attention. She repeatedly told lies about my husband (first she claimed he threw something at her, this is untrue- I was there as were two other eyewitnesses), and at this point she claims that he hit her. Thankfully my other sister was there and has pointed out to everyone that this is totally false. In retaliation, she did not invite him to her wedding until my mother made her (we were not aware of this until later), and then made sure there were no photographs taken of him or our children. She has made comments about our children that are too cruel to repeat here, but it is true that my son has special needs. She did something very similar to my sister- even accusing her husband of stealing from her (this is a total lie and she has never been able to prove it). She's made cruel comments about my sister's infertility as well. She's an awful person and has no one in her life- even her long-suffering husband barely sees her (he moved an hour away "for his job"). I feel really bad for her because it is obvious she needs some sort of help, but she's unwilling to seek any. At this point she is like a pot that is so hot she will burn anyone who goes near her. As a result, my siblings and I have cut her off entirely. My parents continue to enable we behavior, and they're her only friends in the world. Everyone else is gone and she's not yet 30.

I have no anger towards her, but just think cutting her off is the best for me and my family. It's sad.

I just realized I never finished answering all the questions.

I missed her a lot when I first broke off contact, but I was not aware of what she was saying about my children and husband and me of course behind our backs. Once I heard some of her comments, it was easy to keep my silence. When we see each other, we are cordial, but I just do my best to get away from her. I do not think I will ever have a relationship with her, but I've forgiven her. My other sister has not forgiven her yet and still has anger towards her, but still hopes they can reconcile one day. I have thought about reconciling, but I don't miss her and I truly don't trust her around my kids. As I said, anyone who is close to her will get burned. Sad.