My initial emails must suck

[Anonymous]

Ok, so I'm a guy here, and trying the online dating thing. Whenever, I get a match, I send out a simple email, try to comment on things they say in their profile. Let them know I'm interested in keeping conversation going, but never get a response. The only people that I can email are people that accepted me, so I'm not sure what's going on, other than the fact that attractive women are probably sifting through tons of emails a day. Advice would be great. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Could be an attraction thing. One thing I've noticed about these online sites is that men/women often message people "out of their league", so to speak.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Could be an attraction thing. One thing I've noticed about these online sites is that men/women often message people "out of their league", so to speak.

+1

Op, maybe you could try to talk about yourself to let them know what you're all about and see if there's an attraction factor. Don't email someone just based on looks even though it's inevitable that looks always becomes the first attention getter.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately lots of messages go unanswered and not because anything is wrong with you. Keep it short and sweet, while still mentioning something from her profile or asking a question, and then try to forget about it until you get a response.

[Anonymous]

I think it's common for men to contact 10-20 women for every 1 that will contact them back. So keep it short and sweet. Make mention of her profile (don't just use a 'form letter' and don't mention her looks or sex), but don't try to win her over in your first contact.

[Anonymous]

Try this approach

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Could be an attraction thing. One thing I've noticed about these online sites is that men/women often message people "out of their league", so to speak.

+1

Op, maybe you could try to talk about yourself to let them know what you're all about and see if there's an attraction factor. Don't email someone just based on looks even though it's inevitable that looks always becomes the first attention getter.

I hear ya, Op, here, but that's what I'm sating-they have to accept my invite to chat, by seeing my picture and profile, so I'm attractive enough to accept, I guess. I don't know, I hate the online stuff, but that's what we do now, I guess.

[Anonymous]

Post one that got ignored, and we'll analyze.

[Anonymous]

Hi,

Which sites are you using? How old are you and how old are the women that you are targeting? Have you tried just emailing women + or - five years? Most women no matter what they say prefer men close to their age. Unless they are cougars or have daddy issues.

I think to have success in online dating, you have to seriously assess your worth in the marketplace, as crass as it sounds. All they can see is your picture and a few words, so it is easy to eliminate people for the slightest flaws. If you're going for 10s and you are a 7, you won't get anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Are you up on a lot of sites? Maybe you will come off better at an event. Also post one or two of your replies here(take out any info that will Id you) and see what people say.

[Anonymous]

Like PP said, post an email. There are a lot of creepos writing crazy ass emails and thinking there is nothing wrong. You might be one of them.

Here are some basic guidelines: More than 3-4 sentences? Wrap it up, bro. No one wants to read all that. More than 2-3 questions? Fall back. She's not filling out a job application. Comments about her looks? Too thirsty. Nothing substantive? Clearly, you copy/pasted. Personalize for better results. Extensive details about what you are looking for? This ain't McDonald's and you're not ordering off a damn menu.

Oh, and if you are not as attractive as she is then really be gone. Women are tired of men thinking The King of Queens is real life. Modern Family isn't real either, so step away from Sofia Vergara, Al Bundy.

[Anonymous]

First, get a book on online dating so you can see what types of emails work and what don't, then use that as a guideline.

Second, many women get deluged with messages. You'd thikn it's only the attractive ones, but it's the average ones also -- guys think they're an easier catch. To see this in action, use a fake photo and set up a fake photo as a female and watch the emails roll in.

[Anonymous]

Here's a book on online dating strategies: http://swooptheworld.com/e-books/

Yes, it's from a PUA site but the advice is helpful nonetheless.

[Anonymous]

Are you on eharmony? I found that site sucked. Also it's hard to get removed from the site so a lot of the profiles aren't even active. I'm not kidding I had to beg them to remove me by saying I was engaged and my fiancé would call off the wedding if he found me on a dating site. For what it's worth I met my husband on match.

[Anonymous]

It's impossible to say without seeing one of your messages.