In-law situation from miscommunication with DH.
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Anonymous
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My husband is usually the one that talks to his parents. He asked them a month ago, when I was working, if they could visit the week after Christmas to watch the kids. They said yes. I'm not working now so, about ten days ago I asked my DH to talk to them about only coming down on Wednesday (after Christmas) and they usually leave Sunday - giving them four full days here. I mentioned again to him tonight because we have to prep the room for them to stay in and I said we need to get it done by Wednesday. He said, "I think they are coming earlier." I asked him if he told them Wednesday like we talked about. He got pissed and said no. I mentioned about asking them when we call to say Merry Christmas tomorrow and he blew up. When they come to visit I am the one that is here with them because he works until 6:30 every night. They are very into all of your business. I told him that I would ask them tomorrow and again he blew up. WTF?
What would you do?? |
Anonymous
| Tell him to take off and save your vacation and go to work. |
Anonymous
| Stop communicating through your husband. You're not six years old playing a game of Telephone. Contact them directly and say when you're available for them to come and ask if that works with their schedule. |
Anonymous
| I would let them come if they want. If it was fine when you thought you needed babysitting, it should be fine now. Suck it up. |
Anonymous
Yup. |
Anonymous
| You asked them to come, and now you want to uninvite them? And you wonder why your husband is hesitant to call people he loves and hurt their feelings by making it clear that you only invited them as childcare? |
Anonymous
This. I sympathize cause I wouldn't want to spend a week with my ILs either, but if the shoe were on the other foot, I would not disinvite my parents. I would, however, tell them that I took off work after all so if they didn't want to spend the whole week here, they didn't have to. |
Anonymous
| Have them come, take advantage of their babysitting help by running errands you need to get done. If you don't have errands, then shop, get a massage, or spend the day reading at the library. They'll probably be happy to get the grandkids to themselves since that's what they were expecting anyways, and will feel like they're helping you out (as long as you keep it at "errands"--no need to mention that errands includes the spa! Be home in time for dinner with them, DH will be home around then, and you can have a family meal and grown up time in the evening. |
Anonymous
+1. Why isn't this on you? |
Anonymous
| OP here. He talks to his parents instead of me because they are impossible to get a hold of and he usually has to talk to his brothers to track them down. When I brought it up about switching the dates a few days ago he said fine and that he would tell them after he had the kids called them but apparently hat never happend. I am wondering if I should call them now and just explain that I will be home and could they come on Wednesday. |
Anonymous
| DH fail. |
Anonymous
If you do this, you are going to have some major problems with both your ILs and your DH. You really can't uninvite them. |
Anonymous
+1. You will be the bitchy DIL, and you'll have earned it. |
Anonymous
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Why don't you just go to work and use your time off at another time?
I used to work but no longer work. MIL used to come for a week and watch kids while I was at work. I really wanted her to come for less but I have been stuck hanging out with MIL all week. I cannot wait for Sunday when she leaves. |
Anonymous
| Op ~ when you ask a favor one of the most impolite things is to change the plans. It's close enough. Decide to be grateful. |