Grief and death customs in Ethiopia?

[Anonymous]

I am looking to support a few friends with a recent death of a loved one. These friends are from Ethiopia, now living here in DC. I know there's google but I thought if someone here might share with me the best ways that I can support these friends in a culturally-appropriate way. Gifts to bring, things to say/do, what to avoid, etc. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

When our good Ethiopian friends lost a family member there was a three day period where assigned people from the church came over to the house to cook, clean etc. There was also a funeral that was held pretty much all day and traditional food afterward. All attendees in black, women with black shawls, headscarves and much display of sorrow, I.e. women wailing. The mother of the deceased is still dressed in black daily. The family seemed to appreciate flowers, prayers!, attending funeral etc, sharing any memories of deceased and eating the traditional food. The mourning period is very long and I think around the sixth month mark or so another religious event occurred. So my suggestion would be really just being there for them and showing your love and support and if you pray letting them know there loved one is continually in your prayers. This family self-admittedly told us how hard Ethiopians take death, and the community really came together in a way that was quite remarkable. As a born and bred us citizen it was quiet a contrast to how it seems death is handled here..I.e. people come together for a funeral, a few meals and a couple weeks later the family is pretty much on there own to deal with their loss.