frustrating when your child doesn't perform to what you know to be his or her potential.

[Anonymous]

It's really frustrating when your child doesn't perform to what you know to be his or her potential. My son really struggles with details. When he talks it's "good" "fine" "nothing" and when he writes he never provides details and always gets dinged for it. It drives me nuts.

[Anonymous]

Does he know it drives you nuts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's really frustrating when your child doesn't perform to what you know to be his or her potential. My son really struggles with details. When he talks it's "good" "fine" "nothing" and when he writes he never provides details and always gets dinged for it. It drives me nuts.

Not unusual, really. With the writing, that's something with which his English teacher should be helping him. The teacher can work with students, showing examples of details in writing, assigning books to read that have details, and doing a lot of things to help kids understand how to flesh out some details. Not all kids are going to be great descriptive writers, but they can at least learn the mechanics of finding and inserting some details in written work--IF they get practice at it. Talk with the teacher about how your son's lack of detail is "dinging" him as you put it, and find out whether the teacher just expects the kids to be able to come up on their own with details (that does take practice; it doesn't come automatically) or whether she or he actually teaches some skills for pulling up details.

It would help to know your child's age. If your child is in early elementary and the teacher isn't walking them through what a detail in writing really looks like, and giving them practice in using details, then the teacher should be doing so. If your child is older, though, this shouldn't be as tough as it is, and your child might benefit from some extra help with writing.

Regarding answers like "good" and "nothing," is that happening when you ask him things like "How was your day?" or "What did you do in school today?" If so, listen to yourself as you question him. Vague questions like "How was your day," or even "How did history class go today," can elicit very little from kids. Try getting much more specific, for instance, "I remember that your group was doing that presentation in history today. What happened?" If he persists with "It was OK, nothing much happened," you might need to pull out more details, if you can do it without grilling him. Some kids need very specific questions about very specific things they did, or they just answer vaguely.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like he's just not a talkative person. That's okay.

[Anonymous]

My son is GT/LD (gifted & talented / learning disabled). He can get very frustrated in class, since he has trouble articulating and putting on paper what's in his mind. And we are tearing our hair out at home, when he gets standardized test score way above grade level and abysmal grade reports.

If you feel your child has splinter talents and also issues that way be holding him back, you first need to have him evaluated him by a developmental ped or licensed psychologist.

[Anonymous]

A tutor could help with the writing issue. It's fairly common.

[Anonymous]

Every teacher my son has ever had said the same thing about him. He tells me he just doesn't want to have to write the exact thing he just said in class. I can't fault him for that. He's a bit on the lazy side and he isn't alone. All of his friends' mom report the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every teacher my son has ever had said the same thing about him. He tells me he just doesn't want to have to write the exact thing he just said in class. I can't fault him for that. He's a bit on the lazy side and he isn't alone. All of his friends' mom report the same thing.

describes my DS to a “T.” Writing is a craft and it ties practice. You can get better at it. Laziness though, well that’s more a character issue - sad to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every teacher my son has ever had said the same thing about him. He tells me he just doesn't want to have to write the exact thing he just said in class. I can't fault him for that. He's a bit on the lazy side and he isn't alone. All of his friends' mom report the same thing.

describes my DS to a “T.” Writing is a craft and it ties practice. You can get better at it. Laziness though, well that’s more a character issue - sad to say.

takes

[Anonymous]

My son is 8. I guess I am frustrated that he doesn't even provide details in creative writing assignments where there is no right answer. The teacher is just trying to ascertain what's going on in there and while he's a bright kid, his writing suggests nothing is going on in there. For example, sometimes I give him writing prompts. The last one was a picture of a bunch of kids on some swings and I asked him to write a story about the children. He could write anything. Again, there is no right answer. He wrote 2 sentences about the kids on the swings. Really???? Recently, the kids had an assignment in school about making a meal for their family and they had to write what they would make. He wrote that he would make a sandwich and serve it on a plate. No details about what was in the sandwich, what he would serve with the sandwich, why he would serve a sandwich, would it be a hot sandwich or cold sandwich. Nothing. His teacher wrote all types of notes about what would be on it? And how we would serve it. AGH! This kid.