Sexist Female Boss

[Anonymous]

We have a new CEO who is a woman and, i suspect, sexist. I thought I was imagining it but the feelings I've been keeping to myself have been validated by 5 different people in the last few weeks. Examples of her sexism is that she talks disparagingly about the abilities of female coworkers and challenges them in an aggressive manner during group meetings while complimenting, buddying up, and exalting men with similar ideas or who do an inferior job. She's tried to publicly humiliate me on several occasions, but I am young and thought it was just in my head. I report to her and I honestly thought I was being insecure. How could the CEO of a nonprofit talk about the importance of equity in public and behave like a mean girl to almost every single woman who isn't in an admin. role?

Intellectually I know that sexism exists, but i've never seen it up close. I've never been a victim. Her behavior is so bad that I dread going to work at a job I used to love. I already know that I have to leave and I'm working on an exit strategy, but I'm having a hard time looking her in the eye or pretending that I respect her. Any advice on how to exit gracefully? How do I leave with my reputation intact when I know for a fact that she belittles me to people I actually respect behind my back? Any advice to help me feel better? I'm so disheartened that i'm having trouble sleeping.

[Anonymous]

Get your exit strategy together as quickly as humanly possible, and butter her up in whatever way you can in the meantime, or stay off her radar as much as you can. I have seen this on a number of occasions myself. I don't think it's "sexism" so much as "competition." There are some people who feel the need to make themselves seem awesome by cutting other people down. I have noticed that many women strive for male validation and belittle other women to get it. Doesn't matter how successful and important they are, it's never enough.

[Anonymous]

If it gets bad enough I would tell her how you feel. Ask her what you can do to make the situation better. She probably is competitive. Some women are like this. The key is to make them think you think they are amazing and perfect. That's what they are looking for.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like she is shaking up the org. It's not sexist if she see some people are not pulling their weight. Sounds like you are part of the problem she has to deal with. Either get with the program or get out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get your exit strategy together as quickly as humanly possible, and butter her up in whatever way you can in the meantime, or stay off her radar as much as you can. I have seen this on a number of occasions myself. I don't think it's "sexism" so much as "competition." There are some people who feel the need to make themselves seem awesome by cutting other people down. I have noticed that many women strive for male validation and belittle other women to get it. Doesn't matter how successful and important they are, it's never enough.

Exactly and whatever you do, don't try to tell these women that, they'll get all upset and say you're jealous.