Calling all cultural Catholics!

[Anonymous]

Inspired by my friends who are cultural Jews, I'm interested in developing more Catholic rituals for my daughter-advent wreath, Saint's days, but I'm not interested in attending Church or participating in sacraments. Is anyone else doing this? Is this something you have always done, and, if not, how did you start?

[Anonymous]

Why would you do this?

[Anonymous]

No. Really weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

The Catholic church desperately needs more members and sees people like you as good prospects. Once you're back in, all the old rules will apply. Perhaps you can ignore them, as many catholics do, but if you prefer not to go down that road (again) just do the advent wreath and whatever else you want to pass on to your daughter -- kind of like Grandma's recipe for hot cross buns -- you don't have to hold the beliefs to enjoy the custom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

I was an adult before I learned that halloween customs were related to all souls day. It never stopped me from enjoying halloween -- which we celebrated in public school with cut-outs of witches and pumpkins and an apple dunking contest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

The Catholic church desperately needs more members and sees people like you as good prospects. Once you're back in, all the old rules will apply. Perhaps you can ignore them, as many catholics do, but if you prefer not to go down that road (again) just do the advent wreath and whatever else you want to pass on to your daughter -- kind of like Grandma's recipe for hot cross buns -- you don't have to hold the beliefs to enjoy the custom.

OP here: yes, I want to re-embrace the customs, so it's more of a question of how. My secular Jewish friends celebrate certain holidays with parties for friends of many or no faith, but the only people I've ever heard of having a St. Joseph's Day party (or which ever saint) are hardcore neo-traditionalist Catholics-and I'm not that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

The Catholic church desperately needs more members and sees people like you as good prospects. Once you're back in, all the old rules will apply. Perhaps you can ignore them, as many catholics do, but if you prefer not to go down that road (again) just do the advent wreath and whatever else you want to pass on to your daughter -- kind of like Grandma's recipe for hot cross buns -- you don't have to hold the beliefs to enjoy the custom.

OP here: yes, I want to re-embrace the customs, so it's more of a question of how. My secular Jewish friends celebrate certain holidays with parties for friends of many or no faith, but the only people I've ever heard of having a St. Joseph's Day party (or which ever saint) are hardcore neo-traditionalist Catholics-and I'm not that.

One big difference is that there is a well-established community of cultural Jews. You would be creating these customs and then what ... are you inviting over random Catholics to share it with you? Or as you said you'd invite friends of many or no faith? I don't see people jumping at the invitation to come over and celebrate a tradition that means nothing to them and nothing to you.

Sorry.

How about a seasonal party instead? Make it community-themed. Building a village, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

I was an adult before I learned that halloween customs were related to all souls day. It never stopped me from enjoying halloween -- which we celebrated in public school with cut-outs of witches and pumpkins and an apple dunking contest.

Halloween is an established culture phenomenon of its own, though.

[Anonymous]

I'm culturally Protestant, no question. It's not weird at all. Many people are like this but may not think about it in this way.

[Anonymous]

I was raised Catholic and do St Nick's Day with my kids. They leave their shoes out and get little treats in them over night. I used to get an orange, some coins and chocolates. I do the same for my kids.

[Anonymous]

Cafeteria line Catholics (as they used to be called around here) are the only sane ones!

My advice:find a group of similarly minded friends and avoid people whose parents still attend daily mass and who'll try to drag you back into the fold.

Don't expect too much change in the hierarchy, BTW; as long as the Pope has cowardly secret meetings with crazy girls who go to jail for not issuing marriage licenses, the church leadership will not be marked by forward thinking.

The rest of us will have to take a wait-and-see attitude while the world spins merrily on.

The difference is that while there is as a PP noted "a well-established community of cultural Jews" the Catholic church has a love-or-leave-'em attitude towards its flock, which is why attendance peaks at around 20% in Europe. If you want to observe Cultural Catholics, just look to the EU: people have moved on with their lives and still enjoy Christmas and Easter, weddings and baptisms and funerals, but get to live a mostly secular life. Guessing by declining church attendance here, we'll all be that way soon, except for those who already are.

If you want some immediate spiritual gratification, stroll the gardens of the Francisan Monastery in N.E. or the campus of CUA and then drop into the Basilica.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cafeteria line Catholics (as they used to be called around here) are the only sane ones!

My advice:find a group of similarly minded friends and avoid people whose parents still attend daily mass and who'll try to drag you back into the fold.

Don't expect too much change in the hierarchy, BTW; as long as the Pope has cowardly secret meetings with crazy girls who go to jail for not issuing marriage licenses, the church leadership will not be marked by forward thinking.

The rest of us will have to take a wait-and-see attitude while the world spins merrily on.

The difference is that while there is as a PP noted "a well-established community of cultural Jews" the Catholic church has a love-or-leave-'em attitude towards its flock, which is why attendance peaks at around 20% in Europe. If you want to observe Cultural Catholics, just look to the EU: people have moved on with their lives and still enjoy Christmas and Easter, weddings and baptisms and funerals, but get to live a mostly secular life. Guessing by declining church attendance here, we'll all be that way soon, except for those who already are.

If you want some immediate spiritual gratification, stroll the gardens of the Francisan Monastery in N.E. or the campus of CUA and then drop into the Basilica.

Good luck!

This is all well and good but the OP asked specifically about starting traditions with others to include such events as saint feast days. I suggested that if she really wants to bring others into these traditions that it's going to be a hard sell. Most Catholics don't celebrate smaller traditions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you do this?

+1 I get why you'd like the rituals, but I just feel the rituals are empty and meaningless unless you include the meaning behind them. So, I guess, yes, I'd encourage you to do the rituals, but also to do the meaning behind them. Maybe use them as a gateway for dipping your toe back into Catholicism and passing the faith onto yoiur children.

The Catholic church desperately needs more members and sees people like you as good prospects. Once you're back in, all the old rules will apply. Perhaps you can ignore them, as many catholics do, but if you prefer not to go down that road (again) just do the advent wreath and whatever else you want to pass on to your daughter -- kind of like Grandma's recipe for hot cross buns -- you don't have to hold the beliefs to enjoy the custom.

OP here: yes, I want to re-embrace the customs, so it's more of a question of how. My secular Jewish friends celebrate certain holidays with parties for friends of many or no faith, but the only people I've ever heard of having a St. Joseph's Day party (or which ever saint) are hardcore neo-traditionalist Catholics-and I'm not that.

One big difference is that there is a well-established community of cultural Jews. You would be creating these customs and then what ... are you inviting over random Catholics to share it with you? Or as you said you'd invite friends of many or no faith? I don't see people jumping at the invitation to come over and celebrate a tradition that means nothing to them and nothing to you.

Sorry.

How about a seasonal party instead? Make it community-themed. Building a village, etc.

But it does mean something to pp, that's why she wants to hand it down to her daughter - it just lacks its original religious significance - like some other rituals and holidays. Christmas celebrations have become more and more secular, for instance.

Halloween is so secular and universal that people don't think about not celebrating it based on their religion. It takes time, but religious-to-secular transitions do happen.

[Anonymous]

I think it's ridiculous that people are criticizing you for this. Many of the traditions are lovely, so why not.

Make or buy and advent wreath. (Three violet, one rose candle)
Or do a Christmas Pyramid: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_pyramid

Make or buy and advent calendar

Celebrate your child's name day:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Name_day

If she doesn't actually have a saint's name, pick the closest equivalent. She gets a small gift like they do in France.

Sing Christmas carols. Go to sing-alongs.

Follow Christmas Eve feast traditions, e.g., the Italian Feast of the Seven Fishes