Recommendations for schools for ASD/PDA child

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any tips for parenting a PDA child? Are parents supposed to force them to give into demands or avoid making any unnecessary demands?

I do a lot of rewording things.

I don't say "bring your laundry down." I do "what time today will you bring your laundry down?" It is a set expectation that one of their chores is to bring laundry to laundry room every Saturday, but i don't set a specific time. (trying to avoid unnecessary demands - you have to do your chores, but you can control when you do it) Phrasing it as a question helps avoid the demand avoidance. Plus that helps them executive function a plan (another area of improvement for them)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any tips for parenting a PDA child? Are parents supposed to force them to give into demands or avoid making any unnecessary demands?

I do a lot of rewording things.

I don't say "bring your laundry down." I do "what time today will you bring your laundry down?" It is a set expectation that one of their chores is to bring laundry to laundry room every Saturday, but i don't set a specific time. (trying to avoid unnecessary demands - you have to do your chores, but you can control when you do it) Phrasing it as a question helps avoid the demand avoidance. Plus that helps them executive function a plan (another area of improvement for them)

Thanks. How would you rephrase, "Can you brush your teeth and go to bed right now?", or "Can you get into the car right now?" Or does everything need to be flexible timing-wise? Because the answer from my DD being asked usually would be "No" or "Just a minute" (which drags on for 15+ minutes).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about River School in DC?

River School is a mostly mainstream school with additional resources for deaf kids who use oral language. There's nothing about their profile to suggest they are a good placement for students with PDA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any tips for parenting a PDA child? Are parents supposed to force them to give into demands or avoid making any unnecessary demands?

I do a lot of rewording things.

I don't say "bring your laundry down." I do "what time today will you bring your laundry down?" It is a set expectation that one of their chores is to bring laundry to laundry room every Saturday, but i don't set a specific time. (trying to avoid unnecessary demands - you have to do your chores, but you can control when you do it) Phrasing it as a question helps avoid the demand avoidance. Plus that helps them executive function a plan (another area of improvement for them)

Thanks. How would you rephrase, "Can you brush your teeth and go to bed right now?", or "Can you get into the car right now?" Or does everything need to be flexible timing-wise? Because the answer from my DD being asked usually would be "No" or "Just a minute" (which drags on for 15+ minutes).

NP here. I'm not a PDA expert but you could try this. "I know it's hard to leave your toys. But it's time to brush your teeth and get into bed." You could add, "If you get done in less than 5 min, I'll have time to read you an extra story." Focus off the kid, focus onto reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any tips for parenting a PDA child? Are parents supposed to force them to give into demands or avoid making any unnecessary demands?

Thanks. How would you rephrase, "Can you brush your teeth and go to bed right now?", or "Can you get into the car right now?" Or does everything need to be flexible timing-wise? Because the answer from my DD being asked usually would be "No" or "Just a minute" (which drags on for 15+ minutes).

I have a 7 year old but we give choices for basically everything and lots of warning for time. Also timers because somehow the timer going off is less activating than me telling her its time to do whatever thing needs to happen. So you have 3 minutes to brush your teeth do you want to do it now or in 1 minute? Or I'll ask if she wants to use the stawberry toothpaste or apple toothpaste to brush her teeth. For going to bed when its going really badly I'll just say you don't have to go to bed but its time to stay in your room. Do you want the door open or closed. Or I'll say she can build with legos or draw. And then typically she calms down a bit and will get into bed or fall asleep on the floor and I can turn out the light.

[Anonymous]

There is a great app called Gentle Ally and it rephrases things in PDA language and gives you options.

[Anonymous]

My ASD/PDA/ADHD child is doing well this year in FCPS but had to be in a special program where he gets a lot of 1:1 attention and is in Gen Ed half time and special education half time. He gets all the breaks he needs and earns points for prizes he really cares about (like a special lunch). This is the first year we can actually get him to do work!

[Anonymous]

Linder in Alexandria absolutely does take kids on the autism spectrum. My ASD kid is there and thriving. We were very upfront with the school about our child’s neurological profile, including the autism piece, and Linder has been great about supports. They never once said autism was a disqualifier.

Anonymous wrote:Linder will say they don’t take kids with autism, but there are many kids there in the spectrum, and I think it would be a good fit

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ASD/PDA/ADHD child is doing well this year in FCPS but had to be in a special program where he gets a lot of 1:1 attention and is in Gen Ed half time and special education half time. He gets all the breaks he needs and earns points for prizes he really cares about (like a special lunch). This is the first year we can actually get him to do work!

Do you mind saying your kid's age and how he qualified?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any tips for parenting a PDA child? Are parents supposed to force them to give into demands or avoid making any unnecessary demands?

I do a lot of rewording things.

I don't say "bring your laundry down." I do "what time today will you bring your laundry down?" It is a set expectation that one of their chores is to bring laundry to laundry room every Saturday, but i don't set a specific time. (trying to avoid unnecessary demands - you have to do your chores, but you can control when you do it) Phrasing it as a question helps avoid the demand avoidance. Plus that helps them executive function a plan (another area of improvement for them)

Thanks. How would you rephrase, "Can you brush your teeth and go to bed right now?", or "Can you get into the car right now?" Or does everything need to be flexible timing-wise? Because the answer from my DD being asked usually would be "No" or "Just a minute" (which drags on for 15+ minutes).

"What time do you want to start your bedtime routine so you can be in bed by 9?" I mean some things can't be flexible, if you're going to be late for school etc, but I really try to build in her buy-in ahead of time.

[Anonymous]

Auburn school has been great for our PDA child.

[Anonymous]

Can you share more about Auburn and how it works with PDA children?

[Anonymous]

There are a few students with this profile at the Phoenix NOVA School in Fairfax City. It's a pretty new, inclusive K-8 private school. The directors are great about meeting with prospective student families and discussing your child's specific needs. While they do have some students who attend with ABA support, they do not use ABA practices school wide and I have observed students with a PDA profile thriving there. https://www.phoenixnovaschool.com/