estranged family

[Anonymous]

Anyone here estranged from a family member? What made you come to this decision? Do you regret your decision? Was it hard to explain to your kids?

[Anonymous]

From a sibling, yes. I made the decision after I realized that their behavior had a long-standing negative effect on me, they may have some form of serious mental illness (bipolar or borderline personality disorder), and that my life was better, I was happier, without interaction/contact with them. I made the decision a few years ago and do not regret it at all.

Sibling was never involved with the kids much anyway, never really interacted or reached out to them so it wasn't that difficult.

[Anonymous]

Why are you asking op? Why do you want to know other folks private info without providing your own?

[Anonymous]

Op are you estranged from a family member? If so, why? If not what do you think of people who are?

[Anonymous]

OP, has a family member estranged themselves from you? Why do you think that is?

[Anonymous]

OP here. I have a very disfunctional parent and sibling. I'm thinking of becoming estranged from them. They create a lot of stress for my new family. This is a bIf decision, and I was curious if others have regretted doing such a thing.

[Anonymous]

Lots - if not most - families are dysfunctional. If the family members are causing emotional or physical harm to you and yours, then I'd give the relationship a break and see what happens.

I'm in breaks with two family members now who treated me badly. My thought is that I wouldn't let anyone else treat me that way, so why am I putting myself in harmful situations just because they're family. We may get back together some day, but right now the break is freeing. The drama and negativity are out of my life. I believe people can change, so I'm leaving the door open.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Sister and niece. Both are verbally and emotionally abusive. Have had nothing to do with sister since 2008 and have no plans to ever see or speak to her for the remainder of my life.

[Anonymous]

How did you explain the estrangement to your children? Can you give examples of their abuse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did you explain the estrangement to your children? Can you give examples of their abuse?

How old are your kids? It may not take a lot of explaining as it is likely the children have picked up on the disfunction. Don't answer more than they ask.

[Anonymous]

The children involved are toddlers.

[Anonymous]

I was a teen and my bro in middle school when my alcoholic and likely mentally ill father up and left one morning, dumping the IRS, foreclosure, and bankruptcy on my mom along with us kids. That was decades ago. No contact since, and no regrets.

[Anonymous]

Estranged from husband's family because they are very controlling and needy. The more we catered to them the more demanding and controlling they became. They crossed the line with my husband when they said how much they hated that he married me. He cut them out cold turkey and refused to converse with them. It has been amazing. An enormous weight of responsibility and degradation has been lifted from us. We have our lives to live now not the puppet ones we used to suffer.

[Anonymous]

P.S. There's no room in your personal life for people who neither love nor respect you.

[Anonymous]

Estranged from controlling, manipulative sibling who didn't respect me. Expected me to be there for them--and I was--but when I needed them, they were off with friends. Lied to me more times than I care to know. I can't trust sibling, to the point that I couldn't have a relationship. I also struggled with jealousy issues toward sibling (part of manipulation and I'm sure part my own issues) but life has been better not knowing what the Joneses are doing so I don't have to keep up with them.