Middle school/high school parents of GT/LD/ADHD kids - Share your success stories!

[Anonymous]

I'm the parent of a GT/LD/ADHD (2e) 5th grader with predominantly attention and written expression issues. And, of course, homework is really hard to complete in the evening. Right now, I can't see how he can possibly be successful in middle school even with his IEP. I've got a year to prepare as much as I can and would appreciate hearing what you did that made your similar child successful (or things you would have done in retrospect.) Thank you!

[Anonymous]

My kid was excused from busy work, or punishment work. Then he was also allowed to take any tests that would be given on Fridays, on Mondays and if he got no more than one wrong, he was allowed to skip to the next chapter (or spelling list or whatever) and skip all the work associated with the upcoming Friday test.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for opening the subject, OP. I have a 5th grader similar to yours, and we're tearing our hair out right now.

[Anonymous]

DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

Does your son approach individual teachers for the accommodations or do you contact the teachers at the beginning of/during the school year to request the accommodations?

[Anonymous]

You will see that kids mature a lot over the middle school year. A big leap after 6th grade. So things do get better. I see my DC's information processing improving. He can process more than one channel of information at a time. Also self-motivation is improving going into 8th grade. So some things that are making my DC successful are things beyond the control of us parents or the school--it is the maturation process itself.

[Anonymous]

OP - I've been where you are with two kids. Can you go private? if so, I have some schools to recommend. Where do you live (for driving or bus reasons)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

Does your son approach individual teachers for the accommodations or do you contact the teachers at the beginning of/during the school year to request the accommodations?

The accommodations are set annually in his IEP meeting. They also are for state testing and now College Board testing. College Baord was an application process that included the IEP.

[Anonymous]

My son's brain must have matured in middle school and especially now by 8th grade because life got a whole lot easier. HIs 6th grade teachers were great in helping all the kids deal with remembering when to take which books out of their lockers etc. and they always posted HW online and most of the text books were available online as well. So even if he forgot to bring stuff home (a big part of his problem in ES) he could usually look stuff up. He also found a few friends to pair with so he could make copies of things like forgotten homework. ALl his MS teachers let kids use laptops to type assignments and as my son is an excellent typist that made his writing assignments so much easier that he no longer needs a 504.

The change between 6th grade and 8th grade was huge.

For long term projects and motivation, I first tried to find an ADHD coach for him but later just paid him for each part of the project done well and thoroughly. Cost less than the coach and was easier for me and once he learned how to break things down (and get rewarded for each step) he didn't need it at all the next year. With kids with ADHD it's like just completing each step doesn't seem to be a big enough "reward" -- they need something tangible. I want him to care about learning for its own sake of course but when he is doing something he's interested in I don't need to push or reward him.

[Anonymous]

Maturity is a big factor. One thing I did that was really important is that I got the school to work with my son on packing his backpack independently so he had everything home that he needed to do his homework. Another thing I did was to give him responsibility for his homework - where he would do it, when and with what tools. We had our share of failures - nights when he was up until 2 am (which meant new plan the next day - have to learn from mistakes), meltdowns, etc. But, it worked and he was completely independent by MS.

Another thing I did from a younger age was to make him checklists for the morning. In MS, I made it his responsibility to prepare the checklists. He had me laminate one for the front of his binder so that he didn't forget anything at the beginning of each class.

Once he hit MS, I let him loose in Staples to choose what tools he needed to be successful. I told him I would buy whatever he asked for, but I needed him to be thoughtful because I don't have an unlimited checkbook. He bought a very expensive binder that he has used for the past few years and that has worked really well.

My son is now highly successful in school - more than I ever expected. Good luck OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

PP, would you mind sharing what HS he attends, or at least the area you are in? We will be in your shoes soon...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

OP: That's so glad to hear, PP. And, so glad your son is doing well. That is very inspiring! And, also thank you for sharing your specific accommodations as well. Do you feel that these accommodations were key to his success? Or do you feel that as some of the other PPs stated that maturity along the way helped as well? I'm also curious if you do outside tutoring for writing, executive functioning, etc.? Also, it sounds like your son did well with just a 504 plan? Is that the case? Or do you have an IEP as well?

Thanks, all who have responded so far!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - I've been where you are with two kids. Can you go private? if so, I have some schools to recommend. Where do you live (for driving or bus reasons)

I'd be happy to hear some schools suggestions (we are in MC). But, unless we win the lottery, we will have to make MCPS work for us.

[Anonymous]

We had a rough transition to MS and a tough transition. Cannot say enough about having a tutor who specialized in ADHD-- it made a huge difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC has quite severe dyslexia and dysgraphia and ADHD. He is in HS. He has a ton of accommodations to be successful. Teacher notes, extended time on assessments, calculator, scribe and reader on assessments, priority seating, drawing not required- uses computer, has about half a dozen programs on his computer that help (eg Kurzweil, Co-writer), electronic textbooks (this has been the hardest to get in a timely manner- start early), no foreign language.....

Middle school was the worst of the three (ES,MS,HS) in terms of understanding his needs and the legal ramifications of not providing for them. HS has been great.

He also has just a few outside activities, so he has enough time for homework and relaxation. He took his first AP last year and scored a 5. He is take three this year- all science/math. Next year he will take 3 or 4. He gets almost all A's.

OP: That's so glad to hear, PP. And, so glad your son is doing well. That is very inspiring! And, also thank you for sharing your specific accommodations as well. Do you feel that these accommodations were key to his success? Or do you feel that as some of the other PPs stated that maturity along the way helped as well? I'm also curious if you do outside tutoring for writing, executive functioning, etc.? Also, it sounds like your son did well with just a 504 plan? Is that the case? Or do you have an IEP as well?

Thanks, all who have responded so far!

He has had an IEP since 2nd grade and will have one until graduation. We did an outside reading/writing tutor from 2nd grade to mid-7th grade. Maturity has something to do with it and he has the persistence gene from his father that helps, but he would be lost without the accommodations. They are key. His anxiety and OCD tendencies are also helpful right now- that is a balancing act- to keep them at bay.