Relocating for the lower earner?

[Anonymous]

Would you relocate for the lower earning spouse if it was their dream job? Job would not pay for entire family's expenses, so I would have to find a new job too.

[Anonymous]

Depends on how much you enjoy your current job and how difficult/easy it would be for you to find a new job.

I'd also take into consideration the location of the new position and whether I wanted to live there.

[Anonymous]

It also depends on what kind of job. Is it a tenure track academic job? Of course I would, those are very competitive and you don't get to chose location. Is it a position as an HR manager? Probably not.

[Anonymous]

No, probably not.

But it would really depend on the situation and the job. If you can't share more, I'll just say "no."

[Anonymous]

If it's a good opportunity for the spouse, turning it down could lead to resentment and frustration. Could you find a new job in the new area that would also help your career?

[Anonymous]

Yes, if the cost of living in the new location was so low that you would not need as big of a job.

No, if you would still need to be the breadwinner.

I am the breadwinner by a large margin, and my husband is in academia. We live in the location that most benefits my job, and would only move to a new location for my job.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I work in tech, DH works in policy. We would be relocating from SF to DC. SF is to tech what DC is to policy, which is what makes this difficult. In addition, tech jobs in general pay higher than policy jobs, but the policy jobs in DC are arguably better than those available anywhere else.

[Anonymous]

You'll still be able to find well paying tech jobs here in DC, and overall the cost of real estate is better here.

[Anonymous]

Yes, compared to SF, there would be great jobs for you to choose from. It sounds like a realistic option to give you husband a chance to follow his dream job, too, since this is a jmetro area you could find work in, too.

[Anonymous]

It depends on how "portable" you are. I'm an academic and my higher-earning (by a lot) spouse has relocated for my job twice (well, the first time we both wanted to move to that particular area of the country). However, their field is healthcare, so pretty easy for my spouse to get a job.

The only caveat would be if for some reason the portable spouse doesn't want to move--then there can be resentment. So if going this route you both really have to be on the same page re: the best choice for you both as a family unit. Good luck.