My DH keeps saying I am going to divorce him
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Anonymous
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We have had a very difficult year. I believe he was involved in at least an emotional affair. He is having a midlife crisis, and I am trying my best to deal with it. We had the whole deleting texts and emails, changing passwords,coming home late thing going on for over a year.
He knows he was wrong and has placed our marriage in turmoil. In the beginning I was shocked,hurt,heartbroken, you name it. Now, I admit to being indifferent. Sex, which was frequent before, is NOT. If I am not falling all over him proclaiming my undying love, he says I am looking for someone else. I am not. He constantly says that I want a divorce. He is certainly not making me want to be with him. It is a constant struggle between him accusing me of cheating and saying he's done, and him clinging to me saying he loves me and doesn't want to lose me. This is so exhausting, and he is making me cherish the quiet when he is not home interrogating me! At this point, I feel like I am too old for this. I am 50. |
Anonymous
| It sounds like he is projecting. I'm sorry OP. |
Anonymous
| THERAPY |
Anonymous
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What he's saying is that HE wants a divorce. Maybe you should grant it.
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Anonymous
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Sounds like he's wishing you would file so he doesn't have to. Then he can be the poor little victim.
He cheats then makes you feel it's not his fault ? If only you had loved him more.  There is no gag emoticon.
I'd make his wishes come true. |
Anonymous
| He is a coward and wants you to end it for him. |
Anonymous
| How long was the dating period? How long has the marriage gone on? Kids, and if any, ages? |
Anonymous
| We dated for a year and a half. Married over 25 years with 2 kids in college. |
Anonymous
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He is a coward and wants you to end it for him.
+1 |
Anonymous
| Tell him straight up that it's clear that HE is the one that wants to divorce so he needs to file. Otherwise he needs to back off, stop badgering you and give you the space you need to determine how YOU feel about his shitty behavior over the past year. |
Anonymous
Long time....I wonder what flipped in his personality to all of a sudden want out. |
Anonymous
| Ain't nobody got time fa dat! Give him one. |
Anonymous
| OP here. In my opinion, his new job, and a midlife crisis. |
Anonymous
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Midlife crisis is an excuse for regretting opportunities lost. A midlife crisis means he's looking backwards.
If he cared about you he'd be excited about moving forwards. Sounds like he's a combination of selfish, passive aggressive, and emotionally myopic. If you still want to be with him tell him needs to either go to therapy or HE needs to file for divorce. But you don't need to live the guilt for his failings. (BTW- I'm a guy) |
Anonymous
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You are right, you are too old for this nonsense.
Your husband had an emotional affair, if anything bad happens to his marriage, he only has himself to blame. He knows that he is in the wrong, thus his insecurities. However he made his own bed, he needs to prepare to sleep w/it. It sounds like you are more happy being apart vs. being in his company. Not necessarily a good sign of the state of your union. You might want to think about this more in depth. Good luck. |