Fifth grade playdates

[Anonymous]

DS is entering 5th grade in the fall. Just wondering if kids still have (1) Playdates ? (2) Sleepovers?

[Anonymous]

We moved to a walkable neighborhood full of kids during 5th grade- perfect timing so DC can 1)walk home from school and 2)stop at a classmate's house and PHONE HOME to say they are staying to play. On weekends they call around to find out what's happening (kids this age are not good at planning ahead but are good at arranging their own play time). One DC is waaay into sleep-overs. The other, not so much. These are self-arranged.

I would not want to have to drive kids around for parent-arranged play-dates at this age. I could not imagine any other arrangement. My 5th grade DCs are way too old for parents - may not apply to all DCs.

[Anonymous]

They get together with friends regularly to "hang out" but we don't call them playdates anymore. For DD, it's talking with her 2 BFFs during the week to figure out when they are free and whose house they want to be at and then some confirmation/coordination between the 3 sets of parents. They tend to get together mosts weekends, rotating through the different houses. I've been driving or walking with DD to her friends' homes but with her starting 5th grade and almost 11 I'll be letting her walk/bike on her own now.

DS's best friend lives on our street so hang out most days with no advance planning. We also encourage him to call other friends not on our street to plan to get together. Our only role is driving him as needed.

DD loves sleepovers and tends to do them once a month or so. DS's friend regularly sleeps over at our house but DS doesn't like to sleep away from home so he might stay late at his friend's house but then comes home to sleep.

[Anonymous]

Kids arrange themselves. No longer cool to say "playdates". Sleepovers - yes, happening through high school - whenever the parents agree and think it's ok.

[Anonymous]

sure, why wouldn't they? We do "playdates" because my kid is in HGC, and DC's friends are not near us so it takes coordination with the parents.

[Anonymous]

Not all of us live in walkable areas, nor do our kids go to school with neighborhood kids. So, we make a huge effort to get friends together for a "playdate." Its a commitment on our part because we have to drive - but they tend to be all day affairs and we think its important to maintain friendships outside of school - get to know parents in our kids schools. I wish we had neighborhood kids same in age that our kids could regularly just hang out with, we don't and so we have to plan and schedule. To be honest our kids often make the first attempt to arrange the playdate but I rather personally confirm with a parent that the time/location/events work out for everyone and not rely 100% on my kids attempts.

[Anonymous]

Yep. DD is going into 7th and has been doing both since kindergarten. Neither of us see any reason to stop and neither do her friends.

[Anonymous]

My child is going into 4th and I imagine I will be arranging for quite a bit. We go to a private school and the kids are everywhere so there is no walking to someone's house. Frankly I am okay with this because I always hear drama with our public school friends with too much afterschool togetherness. The difference I am seeing as kids get older is more my child asking for a friend over and not me going down the class list. I also notice that with more homework and sports there really is not the same amount of time for playdates anyway. For example in K I would try to get in a playdate a few times a week. Now I think it will be mostly weekends that sort of thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is entering 5th grade in the fall. Just wondering if kids still have (1) Playdates ? (2) Sleepovers?

Just call it "getting together." Kids usually initiate, but it's okay for a parent to suggest to another parent. Sleep overs really depend on the kid. Some start younger than 5th and others older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is going into 4th and I imagine I will be arranging for quite a bit. We go to a private school and the kids are everywhere so there is no walking to someone's house. Frankly I am okay with this because I always hear drama with our public school friends with too much afterschool togetherness. The difference I am seeing as kids get older is more my child asking for a friend over and not me going down the class list. I also notice that with more homework and sports there really is not the same amount of time for playdates anyway. For example in K I would try to get in a playdate a few times a week. Now I think it will be mostly weekends that sort of thing.

my child is going into 5th in private next year and this is my experience as well. The kids can talk about what they want to do but its on the parents to still arrange. During the week it's next to impossible and honestly weekends were tough too as most kids have multiple activities.