I find my child with SNs difficult and unpleasant to be around

Anonymous
There I said it. Vent.
Anonymous
Okay. It's perfectly okay to have negative feelings. The sad thing is that you have bottled this up and feel that it's some deep dark secret.

If you care to, tell us a bit more about your situation and get some tips. If this is simply a vent, please know that your feelings are normal and natural and, perhaps, your child is going through a bad summer, a bad phase, or...school will start in a few weeks! Yay!
Anonymous
Normal - for all parents, at some point. Don't be too hard on yourself. Hang in.
Anonymous
It's hard OP, especially as they get older. My DS with ADHD is almost nine. He is often argumentative and and disrespectful. We try to do the right things as parents, but he doesn't think before he acts, so it makes it difficult. I think the "hard" part is that I can now see the ADHD so clearly as DS is getting older. His friends are so far ahead in terms of maturity.
Anonymous
How old is he? Is there anything that you can help your child change?
Anonymous

Revisit your expectations, and do whatever you can to find the pleasant moments. Is there an activity you can enjoy together? Is there a time of day when things run more smoothly? Focus on the positives, OP. It's not easy, but once you find them, the good times can cover a lot of the frustration.
Anonymous
Big hug, OP. My DD with ADD was/is difficult to like at times when making poor decisions. I find it helpful to look at photos of happy times and remember that this too shall pass.
Anonymous
My oldest has HFA. He is frequently difficult and unpleasant to be around. As much as I can, I take those times to help him reshape his behavior to something more socially appropriate. He doesn't want to be a jerk. He just doesn't know how to act and he doesn't know how to learn behavior from observation.

I am not 100% successful with this strategy. Sometimes I just want to drink wine in the bathtub and be left alone.

Constistenly reshaping bad behavior into appropriate behavior is exhausting. He's going to 13 soon, though and it is having very positive outcomes for him. I feel good about that. I also feel like I've been parenting a toddler for the past 11-13 years.
Anonymous
Me too, sister. I am dying for the school year to start, but then again, there are so many issues at school...

Anonymous
I was going to post the same aboit my kid today too.
Anonymous
Yes, indeedy. My ADHD/GAD kiddo can get on my last nerve. And just about everyone else's too--especially teachers'.

Respite/me time is a necessity. And I try to remind myself that it's when kids are most unloveable that they most need our love and support.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I was going to post the same aboit my kid today too.


Something about August really gets me down, too. Every summer I have all these ideas about all the fun things we are going to do, and then every outing (I have 4 dc, one with ASD and severe anxiety) seems to go poorly, and then we just feel stuck at home, and I wonder why I used to like summer.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My oldest has HFA. He is frequently difficult and unpleasant to be around. As much as I can, I take those times to help him reshape his behavior to something more socially appropriate. He doesn't want to be a jerk. He just doesn't know how to act and he doesn't know how to learn behavior from observation.

I am not 100% successful with this strategy. Sometimes I just want to drink wine in the bathtub and be left alone.

Constistenly reshaping bad behavior into appropriate behavior is exhausting. He's going to 13 soon, though and it is having very positive outcomes for him. I feel good about that. I also feel like I've been parenting a toddler for the past 11-13 years.


Did I write this? I don't think I did because my DC is 10, but somebody got into my head and wrote down my thoughts! Oh well to be honest, this doesn't completely sound like me. I do what you do with trying to reshape, but every now and then I lose it and yell and I hate to admit, as long as it doesn't happen often, it is effective. Hang head in shame for my bad parenting...
Anonymous
That's why I try to be around people who are positive, nice and kind, to balance out my negative outlook
Anonymous
Same here. My DS has developed the super annoying habit of getting into other people's space. Wants to kiss his tutor, cousin, etc on the mouth. He thinks it is funny. Not. He is 8 and off his ADHD meds for the summer.
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