Things that are unintentional status symbols.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
+1. Yup. This is a New England thing, though, I think. I'm from CT so I get this (though, sadly, I'm not one of the lucky ones). But yeah, we have friends with old family homes on the Vineyard and random little islands in Maine. They wear LL Bean fleeces all summer at said cottages (which are always extremely low-key, weathered, and rustic but at the same time perfectly tasteful and of obvious quality that has aged well). Old Volvos and Saabs and, back in the day, Jeep Wagoneers (remember those? LOVE). Very little jewelry or makeup, but they're always in shape so they can pull of the sporty look well. They ski, they sail, they know art, and they have interesting names for their grandparents. Point being, they don't have to broadcast their money with more high-end fleeces or white elephant summer homes. The low-key approach broadcasts their privilege and family background much more effectively to those who understand the code. I actually find it more refreshing than the flashiness around DC.

YES!!!!!!! Nailed it.

Yes indeed.

What is a white elephant summer house? Maybe this means I don't get it. Ha!

[Anonymous]

It's a family "cottage" built a hundred years ago that's shabby and expensive to maintain, but no one wants to sell or update it. Read "The Big House" by Henry Colt for a neat look at this kind of thing.

I know there's been debate about where this thread started and where it went, so I'll chime in with what I think unintentional status symbols are -- they are the things that my neighbor, who lives in a similarly sized house and what I presume to be a somewhat equivalent HHI, has that makes me wonder how she can afford them and ruminate on how I really can't. Just little things, like shopping bags from higher-end stores instead of Target. Or getting the newest iPhone when the latest model comes up vs. waiting for her contract to end. Or once I offered to bring Starbucks to a friend since I was going by anyway and she declined because she has a Nespresso. None of these people live in giant houses or wear giant diamonds, but have little signs that they may be doing a tad better financially than me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carpool lane numbers in the front of cars.

good one!

What is this?

Its a little placard you display on your front passenger window so the school knows which child(dren) you are picking up. Often for private school. Can also be for public school children who don't ride the bus. (We don't have a bus because we are less than 1 mile away, so we drive.) Either way, there is usually a SAHM driving the car.

Not always. At our Catholic school, we have carpool #s and we're all just big Catholic families toting our numerous kids around in mini-vans out in the suburbs.

I think being a SAHM To numerous kids in any kind of private school IS an unintentional status symbol. Thank you for making my point!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carpool lane numbers in the front of cars.

good one!

What is this?

Its a little placard you display on your front passenger window so the school knows which child(dren) you are picking up. Often for private school. Can also be for public school children who don't ride the bus. (We don't have a bus because we are less than 1 mile away, so we drive.) Either way, there is usually a SAHM driving the car.

Not always. At our Catholic school, we have carpool #s and we're all just big Catholic families toting our numerous kids around in mini-vans out in the suburbs.

I think being a SAHM To numerous kids in any kind of private school IS an unintentional status symbol. Thank you for making my point!

I am not a SAHM!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carpool lane numbers in the front of cars.

good one!

What is this?

Its a little placard you display on your front passenger window so the school knows which child(dren) you are picking up. Often for private school. Can also be for public school children who don't ride the bus. (We don't have a bus because we are less than 1 mile away, so we drive.) Either way, there is usually a SAHM driving the car.

Not always. At our Catholic school, we have carpool #s and we're all just big Catholic families toting our numerous kids around in mini-vans out in the suburbs.

I think being a SAHM To numerous kids in any kind of private school IS an unintentional status symbol. Thank you for making my point!

Learn to read: where is SAHM in the above post?

[Anonymous]

I find this thread amusing. I have many of the things listed (including the painted portraits of long dead family members, though not in the dining room) only because we became the family repository for things no one in our parents' generation cared to keep in their own homes, but didn't want to part with as a result of the family history as we were the first in the next generation to purchase a home.

We aren't rich by any stretch. Though perhaps I could sell the 4 sets of family china and 2 sets of silver.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
As someone with diagnosed Celiac, I am thankful for the people with "eating disorders" and the autistic community because they add to our numbers and make it viable for companies to manufacture gluten free bread and other food items.

what we need is more autism and anorexia because then you'll have even more choices

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carpool lane numbers in the front of cars.

good one!

What is this?

Its a little placard you display on your front passenger window so the school knows which child(dren) you are picking up. Often for private school. Can also be for public school children who don't ride the bus. (We don't have a bus because we are less than 1 mile away, so we drive.) Either way, there is usually a SAHM driving the car.

Not always. At our Catholic school, we have carpool #s and we're all just big Catholic families toting our numerous kids around in mini-vans out in the suburbs.

I think being a SAHM To numerous kids in any kind of private school IS an unintentional status symbol. Thank you for making my point!

Learn to read: where is SAHM in the above post?

Ok, you can go sit down now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
As someone with diagnosed Celiac, I am thankful for the people with "eating disorders" and the autistic community because they add to our numbers and make it viable for companies to manufacture gluten free bread and other food items.

what we need is more autism and anorexia because then you'll have even more choices

I think she means the falsely identified ones to bloat the overall numbers. At least that would be less offensive then the other interpretation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A kid who has his/her own Starbucks order (This may be more UMC).

A preschooler who can hail a cab.

Not knowing what public school your address is zoned for, since it was never considered an option.

Inviting the entire class to the birthday party.

I think that leaving out the girl whose parents are "weird" is more of a status symbol around here, actually. Being inclusive is considered low brow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carpool lane numbers in the front of cars.

good one!

What is this?

Its a little placard you display on your front passenger window so the school knows which child(dren) you are picking up. Often for private school. Can also be for public school children who don't ride the bus. (We don't have a bus because we are less than 1 mile away, so we drive.) Either way, there is usually a SAHM driving the car.

Not always. At our Catholic school, we have carpool #s and we're all just big Catholic families toting our numerous kids around in mini-vans out in the suburbs.

I think being a SAHM To numerous kids in any kind of private school IS an unintentional status symbol. Thank you for making my point!

Does the special needs school my kid goes to qualify? It's only for SN kids and the county foots the bill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whole foods bags

Living in a "tiny home" (as opposed to, say, a mobile home, small condo, or 800-sq-ft Cape).

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/380662.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A kid who has his/her own Starbucks order (This may be more UMC).

A preschooler who can hail a cab.

Not knowing what public school your address is zoned for, since it was never considered an option.

Inviting the entire class to the birthday party.

I think that leaving out the girl whose parents are "weird" is more of a status symbol around here, actually. Being inclusive is considered low brow.

That's sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A kid who has his/her own Starbucks order (This may be more UMC).

A preschooler who can hail a cab.

Not knowing what public school your address is zoned for, since it was never considered an option.

Inviting the entire class to the birthday party.

I think that leaving out the girl whose parents are "weird" is more of a status symbol around here, actually. Being inclusive is considered low brow.

That's sad.

Nope. Inviting the whole class is the unintentionally high class thing. Never the whole
class save one.

[Anonymous]

Other symbols. Active in church (Episcopalian or Presbyterian) but not bible thumping. Give to charity both with time and money. Give to schools (privates and college/university), regular cars.

Basically whatever comes to mind with Nouveau riche (fancy cars, flashy clothes, conspicuous spending, clawing for the elite soccer team because it matters for college)--think the opposite.