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Help!! I am not sexually atrracted to my husband anymore
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Anonymous
| So my husband and I have been married for 7 years and we NEVER have sex anymore. Its not that I find him unattractive, he takes reasonably good care of himself. But I just don't want him like I used to. On the flip side he doesnt seem to want me anymore either. What to do?! |
Anonymous
| Honey, is that you? I thought you said you were tired?!? |
Anonymous
I LOVE this board!! |
Anonymous
| LOL |
Anonymous
| OK - I can't believe I'm saying this... but is there a problem? Or are you both OK with not getting any? |
Anonymous
|
There are so many reasons that the libido decreases with parenthood, but the bottom line is that the longer you go without sex or physical contact, the harder it is to relate to each other as sexual beings. Maybe if you saw that spark in your DH's eye, and vice versa, it would heat things up a bit... because you would see him as a man with a sex drive rather than a co-parent, roommate, etc.
At least this was the case in my situation. We've started to go out on dates when we can and regularly schedule sex (not so romantic, but does jump-start things) because if you don't use it, you lose it. This may sound odd but I also find porn helpful--it turned me on to see my DH turned on and helped me see him as a sexual being again (my drive was the problem, not his). How long has this been going on? Was if ever "hot" between you? |
Anonymous
|
It sounds like you are both bored and need to spice things up a bit. Honestly I find sex to be one of thoese things where if you aren't doing it regularly you forget how good it is. When I'm having sex, I want more sex.
Buy some sexy lingerie and put a little effort out and I think you will be rewarded in spades. The earlier response is cracking me up. 
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Anonymous
| As long as you do not AVOID physical contact, you are ok. |
Anonymous
| single mom here. send him over to my place a few nights a week. i will take care of business and then happily send him home. |
Anonymous
| I went through a phase like this a few years ago and asked my OB GYN about it. She checked my hormone levels and found everything normal, and told me that she guessed that the stresses of daily life were draining on the libido. I think my DH was so stressed and demoralized he was afraid of asking or initiating--so he just stopped asking. She recommended getting away from the kids, doing a non-kids related get away with DH. We now do that a few times a year and it does help get us in the mood (though sometimes the "magic" doesn't take effect until the second day) and build romance. I also agree with the other poster who talked about the more you get some, the more you want it. And, unfortunately in our case the water cooler thing about being about to tell if someone "needs a good ___" is true--once it started happening, a side benefit was that we were both much more pleasant in everyday life. |
Anonymous
Are you busy this Saturday night ? 
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Anonymous
| Fire him immediately! |
Anonymous
|
amazingly enough most women do not really want to have anything to do with sex
for about 3 years after child being born.. some like 80% admit to it, the other 20 is laying aobut it 
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Anonymous
| really? |
Anonymous
|
This reminds me of this one Dr. Phil show I saw where Dr. Phil said sexual attraction is everything to do with the human MIND and has nothing to do with the physicality of a person. So feeling like you are not sexually attractedis a problem of the mind You need to work to spice things up in your marriage. It's something that can absolutely be remedied. Have date nights, spend time alone, talking, doing things....
Kids have an amazing ability to squelch the romance out of an otherwise wonderful marriage. |