Do widowed women remarry sooner or later?

[Anonymous]

s/o of "men need women, so men tend to remarry quick" thread, for those men who have been widowed. I wonder, is the inverse true of women who are widowed? Do they really not need the "chore" of men? Or is it a sign (like men) of a happy marriage, if they remarry soon after the death of their spouse?

[Anonymous]

I don't want to re-marry ever again if my husband dies. He is a good man and I love him, but I can't say in honest truth that marriage life is that wonderful that would make me want to re-marry. Marriage life is hard and on top of it, I would not want a "strange" man trying to be a father to my daughters. Knowing myself, I would never allow a possible second husband to scold, punish or just "parent" my children. But I do recognize that would probably make things tense and unworkable in a family.

And pls, before this thread details because of my comments, pay attention that I never claimed steps rents shouldn't be allowed to parent and discipline their step children. It is just my personal issue and a character trait I recognize on myself.

[Anonymous]

Usually not at all.

[Anonymous]

I know of one widow who eventually began a longterm relationship but so far has not remarried.

I don't think I'd remarry.

[Anonymous]

Zero desire to remarry, at least until my kids are out of the house. I've seen lots of heartbreak in "blended" families and don't want to subject myself or my kids to that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Zero desire to remarry, at least until my kids are out of the house. I've seen lots of heartbreak in "blended" families and don't want to subject myself or my kids to that.

Ditto. Widowed over 16 years and I can't think of a single reason to remarry. I know several widows and widowers who remarried due to loneliness and regretted it bitterly.

[Anonymous]

I'm a recent widow and even dating seems gross to me. My husband was so great and interesting and I doubt I'd ever find anyone even half as good. Besides, I can't remarry until after I'm 61 in order to get husband's SS.

[Anonymous]

It would be hard to remarry and deal with blended family issues while still dealing with what would be former in laws etc. But I love my husband and being married to him. I wouldn't likely actively seek it out, but if I met someone who was right for me and my kids I would be open to it.

[Anonymous]

Just remarried after 5 years.

[Anonymous]

Women generally live longer than men, so there are more older ladies around than older men. This is one reason many older ladies are single.

[Anonymous]

My SIL became a widow at 35. She started dating someone seriously at 40 but broke it off when he became too dependent/controlling. She has so much trauma from my BIL's passing (motorcycle accident), that she is ruined (her words) from relationships. As soon as it gets remotely serious she bales. Self protection I guess.

[Anonymous]

My mom was widowed at 40 and remarried 4 years later. DH's grandmother was widowed in middle age and she remarried.

[Anonymous]

Elderly, long-married women typically do! The older the woman she is when widowed, it seems the more likely she is to remarry. Just going by what I see at my parents' local retirement community (65 plus) and in my parents circle of friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Zero desire to remarry, at least until my kids are out of the house. I've seen lots of heartbreak in "blended" families and don't want to subject myself or my kids to that.

+1. I would not even consider it until the kids were out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Zero desire to remarry, at least until my kids are out of the house. I've seen lots of heartbreak in "blended" families and don't want to subject myself or my kids to that.

+1. I would not even consider it until the kids were out.

^^Meant to add that that I have no interest in helping to raise anyone else's children either.