10 year old son outgoing- but very worried about everything... Normal?

[Anonymous]

son outgoing- popular- athletic... But seems to be overly terrified of many things--- like tornadoes, Isis, etc. when it's stormy, he has to be near an iPhone or Tv to watch weather channel. If it rains, he asks us 50 times, "is there going to be tornado".... Searched on Computer about ISIS to see if they are in our town.... Have friends who moved to South Africa and we want to visit and he started crying And doesn't want to go because of Ebola. We had random car on our block Last weekend and he couldn't go to sleep until we called security in our neighborhood to check it out. We get annoyed a bit at how Crazy he acts, but is this normal at this age and what should we do?

[Anonymous]

Not normal. Your child is anxious. You could try to read a bit about it and talk to him about his fears. Or you could try a therapist. Us this a change in personality for him?

[Anonymous]

Anxiety, don't wait to take him to a therapist.
I waited for my son and things got worse.

[Anonymous]

I don't remember him being so anxious before- he has always been careful and cautious. But not like now. Should I talk to school counselor or private one?? We are going to nyc this summer and wanted to visiIt the 9 11 memorial but I told my husband I think it will put him over the edge. My husband gets aggravated but I think he'll internalize and then worry the entire vacation about airplanes and terrorists.
In general, how should I handle his irrational fears- like that every rain storm is a deadly tornado? Should I let him watch the Weather channel or is it more calming to keep all that away from him? And how do I tell my husband to back off on getting mad at him? He thinks he's being a total wimp and over reacting. I Told him to take it easy but he gets annoyed -

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't remember him being so anxious before- he has always been careful and cautious. But not like now. Should I talk to school counselor or private one?? We are going to nyc this summer and wanted to visiIt the 9 11 memorial but I told my husband I think it will put him over the edge. My husband gets aggravated but I think he'll internalize and then worry the entire vacation about airplanes and terrorists.
In general, how should I handle his irrational fears- like that every rain storm is a deadly tornado? Should I let him watch the Weather channel or is it more calming to keep all that away from him? And how do I tell my husband to back off on getting mad at him? He thinks he's being a total wimp and over reacting. I Told him to take it easy but he gets annoyed -

His irrational fears are rational to him. You getting in an argument that they're not will not get anywhere productive. Get him a private therapist, outside of school.

[Anonymous]

You are accommodating his anxiety rather than treating it. Get a private therapist who specializes in CBT. Sometimes kids need meds in order to access the therapy, but you can hold off on that. I agree with PP, it will get worse. Been there, seen that.

[Anonymous]

And bring your DH to meet the therapist as well so he can hear from a professional.

[Anonymous]

OP - It is quite possible that puberty and hormones are starting and revving up whatever inner anxieties that he has had. As the Mom of one grown daughter who still have high anxiety as a part of her DNA, we can look back and see glimpses of it as early as age 7. We should have gotten her the help she needed them to learn to control her emotions - more than fears as it blew up when she went away from the routine, structure and family support structure. And then it took a decade to get it under control for the long-term.
I would keep the tone down about it - just explain there are doctors who can help one understand one's thoughts and feelings better and you would like to have him visit one.

[Anonymous]

I agree with all of the above. Definitely include your DH in the therapy. It will help him understand that this is something real, not your DC being a "wimp" or anything like that. It will also help him -- and you -- continue to support your DS in the most effective ways.

Also, I don't think this is a substitute for therapy, but you might want to take a look at this book to see whether it might resonate with your DS:

http://www.amazon.com/What-When-You-Worry-Much/dp/1591473144

It was recommended awhile back on a different thread, and we found it helpful in our house.

[Anonymous]

My DS was a lot like this around that age. We took him to a therapist for a few sessions. He was much better after just a few visits. He's 16 now, and now only occasionally a bit anxious. Definitely seemed to peak in 5th grade.

Don't know where you are but we saw Betsy Carmichael in Silver Spring.
http://www.alvordbaker.com/aboutus.html