Flying with two kids across the country

[Anonymous]

I'll be flying with a 3 yr old and just-turned 2 yr old with special needs from California to London. DH was supposed to come with us, since it's a family vacation. However, he has to work in NY for a couple of days before our trip and now will fly to London alone.

1. Can I ask our nanny to hire her to help me on this ten hour flight? We'd pay for her flight obviously, and her time and the flight back. I know I should be able to handle this but I know myself, and know I can't. We've been planning this trip since January of 2014 so we don't want to cancel.

2. Is it frowned upon to take little kids in first class? I don't want to spend ten hours crammed in coach and think it would be pretty shitty to leave both kids in coach with the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Just out of curiosity, when you say you "can't handle it", what do you think would happen?

[Anonymous]

So you would have all 4 of you (nanny, 2 children, and yourself) in first class?

Don't forget that not only do you have to pay for the nanny's flight and time, but if she stays in London for the duration of your trip, you will have to pay for her accommodation there too. Or will you have friends/family in London that will help you, and want the nanny to immediately return back to the United States? She will still likely need to stay at least one night in a hotel--I can't imagine that even if you were able to find a flight back within a few hours, that she would agree to it. Mentally and physically she will probably need a break after the long California-London flight.
So you would need to pay for her hotel room, plus some extra money for meals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you would have all 4 of you (nanny, 2 children, and yourself) in first class?

Don't forget that not only do you have to pay for the nanny's flight and time, but if she stays in London for the duration of your trip, you will have to pay for her accommodation there too. Or will you have friends/family in London that will help you, and want the nanny to immediately return back to the United States? She will still likely need to stay at least one night in a hotel--I can't imagine that even if you were able to find a flight back within a few hours, that she would agree to it. Mentally and physically she will probably need a break after the long California-London flight.
So you would need to pay for her hotel room, plus some extra money for meals.

We would give give her a full day and night in London before putting her on a plane back home. DH will be with us once we get to Europe and fly back with us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you would have all 4 of you (nanny, 2 children, and yourself) in first class?

Don't forget that not only do you have to pay for the nanny's flight and time, but if she stays in London for the duration of your trip, you will have to pay for her accommodation there too. Or will you have friends/family in London that will help you, and want the nanny to immediately return back to the United States? She will still likely need to stay at least one night in a hotel--I can't imagine that even if you were able to find a flight back within a few hours, that she would agree to it. Mentally and physically she will probably need a break after the long California-London flight.
So you would need to pay for her hotel room, plus some extra money for meals.

We would give give her a full day and night in London before putting her on a plane back home. DH will be with us once we get to Europe and fly back with us.

Wait, you're going to have a nanny fly with your special needs kid from California to London, giving the nanny ONE night hotel money, and then flying the nanny back?

Wow, you're sooooooooo generous!

[Anonymous]

Sounds like a plan. An insane plan, but nevertheless, a plan.

[Anonymous]

If it's transatlantic, I would do business rather than first. But maybe not all the carriers are 3-class to London. I would also offer to pay for a couple more nights in London. You don't need to pay her for that time, but at least offer her the option to stay and make a real mini vacation out of it. And no, you cannot stow the kids and nanny in coach while you relax in first. I am sympathetic to the difficulty of wrangling two very young kids, one with special needs, on a long long flight alone, but there's a difference between "I can't do this alone" and "I'll let someone else do it alone."

[Anonymous]

I would take the 3-year old with you in First and have the nanny go in coach with the 2-year old with special needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you would have all 4 of you (nanny, 2 children, and yourself) in first class?

Don't forget that not only do you have to pay for the nanny's flight and time, but if she stays in London for the duration of your trip, you will have to pay for her accommodation there too. Or will you have friends/family in London that will help you, and want the nanny to immediately return back to the United States? She will still likely need to stay at least one night in a hotel--I can't imagine that even if you were able to find a flight back within a few hours, that she would agree to it. Mentally and physically she will probably need a break after the long California-London flight.
So you would need to pay for her hotel room, plus some extra money for meals.

Sounds like money is no object here

[Anonymous]

I don't get the issue.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you just wait for your husband? Bump the trip back a few days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would take the 3-year old with you in First and have the nanny go in coach with the 2-year old with special needs.

Don't do this. It smacks of putting the servants and the embarrassing family members in steerage.

Everybody goes in 1st or everybody goes in coach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you just wait for your husband? Bump the trip back a few days.

Because he'd have to fly from NY to CA and then CA to London with us. There's no need for him to fly across the country twice.

[Anonymous]

People who frown on children being children in public will frown on small kids in premium cabins -- however, if they want to fly without the rest of the general public in their space, they are welcome to charter private jets. Your money is as good as theirs.

As for flying in first, check the configuration of the seats. Some of the first class seats (the lie-flat style) can be configured in such a way that you are far from your seatmates -- in this case, your kids. I like PPs suggestion of business if you want to upgrade. If you end up flying with your nanny, make it two in front of two.

Coach is really not that bad with little kids if they have their own seat. When you fly with kids, your seatmates are always small, and you get extra room.

I also recommend taking a redeye. Your kids will likely sleep for the majority of the flight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would take the 3-year old with you in First and have the nanny go in coach with the 2-year old with special needs.

Don't do this. It smacks of putting the servants and the embarrassing family members in steerage.

Everybody goes in 1st or everybody goes in coach.

Nonsense. People have paid up to $20K for a first class seat on a flight from LAX to LHR. At those prices, neither a nanny nor a small kid freaking out are appropriate. And I can guarantee that if everyone else in the cabin is pissed off, you won't be enjoying it either, no matter how much you have paid.

If your three year old is well behaved, have them with you in first. If not, have them at the back with the nanny and the special needs kid.You are spending a lot of money on this trip, it is only right that you enjoy it. You know yourself - can you really deal with the hassle? Yes, it will be more work for the nanny, but you can just bung her another couple of thousand dollars, or "quid" in spending money. Let her take herself to Harrods or wherever and buy herself something nice before she shuttles back to the US of A.