Attendance pressure

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well guess what? My child’s teacher is leaving for overseas today. Subs all next week!

This is high school too. So don’t anyone ever tell me we can’t go on vacation. Eff off!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

This may be one reason parents are fed up— in the past, teachers weren’t all over social media sharing their Disney vacations in February. It may be that the actual instances of teachers taking midyear vacations hasn’t changed much, just the awareness of the phenomenon has.

Like the posts sitting on the beach during COVID and talking about how much they missed the kids?

Had a neighbor who did that.

I don’t even think it has to be something egregious. Family photo of kids with Mickey gets posted to Facebook, even if settings are private, a friend shows it in their mom’s group has “this is what the teachers are doing” and now the credibility is gone.

I think there’s a message about minimizing absences that also respects the need for time with family, economic conditions, and working with parents to minimize academic impact . It just certainly wasn’t this.

Teachers are allowed vacations.

Absolutely! So is every other parent. If policy supports one it must support the other.

Take your kid on a vacation but don't ask for work packets and make ups when you come back. Your vacation should not mean extra work for the teacher. And don't complain if your kids grade drops or they are struggling with the material. The teacher shouldn't
have to tutor your kid because you chose a vacation.

I saw a post on the FCPS facebook page where a parent was worried that the teacher wouldn't sign off on the form saying the kid was going to miss extended time for a vacation. The teacher wrote on the form that the child was struggling with the class and missing extra time was going to make it harder for the kid. The parents concern wasn't the struggling kid but the fact that the teacher didn't sign the form. The advice from posters was that the form was a courtesy and to go ahead and enjoy the vacation, no concerns about the kid struggling with the class and then missing more class.

Here is the unsupportable double standard. When the teacher goes on vacation for a week, it makes additional work for all 28 families in their class. That’s OK! The same policy which supports a February Disney trip for a teacher supports an extra week at Spring Break for a student.

If that bothers you, you’ll have to fix it at the administration level which allows teachers to travel midyear. Because if you push back at providing work and make ups, parents will simply get the absences excused and it will no longer be at your discretion.

I would love to see some data on this. Who are all these teachers going to Disney for a week? If we were to take this thread as fact, then Disney is filled with American educators all winter long!!! The place must be packed. Yet I know of only one teacher who has gone to Disney during the winter, and I’ve been teaching for over 20 years. She missed two days of school and felt guilty about it.

And inconveniencing families with our absences? I missed two days this year. (Sorry, DCUM. I caught the flu. I apologize for my absence, but my 102 fever and aching muscles made it a bit hard to get out of bed. I’ll do better.) I left meticulous plans and had the work graded with comments by the end of the evening. I’m sorry that was such an inconvenience.

Did you profusely thank every parent who may have been inconvenienced? Did you recognize the time they spent finding tutoring and getting their? The resources they lost paying those tutors? The hours they could have been spending in quality time with their children instead of teaching?

Doesn’t that say something about you if you didn’t?

Because thats how ridiculous your idea that a teacher is going above and beyond by providing material upon a students return is.

Teachers who go above and beyond absolutely deserve thanks and recognition and appreciation from parents (who should also send the praise to administrators). What you’re describing is not above and beyond.

I'm the parent of four kids, and I am surprised by the part of your statement that I bolded above.

Isn't it our job as parents to teach our children? Isn't that quality time spent with our children? I have always found tremendous value and fulfillment in reviewing content with my kids, helping them think a different way, providing them with additional resources related to an area of interest or study, asking them to teach me about a subject they're studying, etc. All of that is teaching, and I believe that is our job as parents.

We sometimes need to teach our kids a lesson they missed in school either because they just didn't get it, they were spaced out, they were absent, they thought they understood but then realized that they didn't, etc. Sitting with them to work on school work is treasured time, quality time.

The teachers have 150 kids. I have 4. They might not realize that my kid was acting like they understood, but my kid can't fool me. It's my job to help them learn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

This may be one reason parents are fed up— in the past, teachers weren’t all over social media sharing their Disney vacations in February. It may be that the actual instances of teachers taking midyear vacations hasn’t changed much, just the awareness of the phenomenon has.

Like the posts sitting on the beach during COVID and talking about how much they missed the kids?

Had a neighbor who did that.

I don’t even think it has to be something egregious. Family photo of kids with Mickey gets posted to Facebook, even if settings are private, a friend shows it in their mom’s group has “this is what the teachers are doing” and now the credibility is gone.

I think there’s a message about minimizing absences that also respects the need for time with family, economic conditions, and working with parents to minimize academic impact . It just certainly wasn’t this.

Teachers are allowed vacations.

Absolutely! So is every other parent. If policy supports one it must support the other.

Take your kid on a vacation but don't ask for work packets and make ups when you come back. Your vacation should not mean extra work for the teacher. And don't complain if your kids grade drops or they are struggling with the material. The teacher shouldn't
have to tutor your kid because you chose a vacation.

I saw a post on the FCPS facebook page where a parent was worried that the teacher wouldn't sign off on the form saying the kid was going to miss extended time for a vacation. The teacher wrote on the form that the child was struggling with the class and missing extra time was going to make it harder for the kid. The parents concern wasn't the struggling kid but the fact that the teacher didn't sign the form. The advice from posters was that the form was a courtesy and to go ahead and enjoy the vacation, no concerns about the kid struggling with the class and then missing more class.

Here is the unsupportable double standard. When the teacher goes on vacation for a week, it makes additional work for all 28 families in their class. That’s OK! The same policy which supports a February Disney trip for a teacher supports an extra week at Spring Break for a student.

If that bothers you, you’ll have to fix it at the administration level which allows teachers to travel midyear. Because if you push back at providing work and make ups, parents will simply get the absences excused and it will no longer be at your discretion.

I would love to see some data on this. Who are all these teachers going to Disney for a week? If we were to take this thread as fact, then Disney is filled with American educators all winter long!!! The place must be packed. Yet I know of only one teacher who has gone to Disney during the winter, and I’ve been teaching for over 20 years. She missed two days of school and felt guilty about it.

And inconveniencing families with our absences? I missed two days this year. (Sorry, DCUM. I caught the flu. I apologize for my absence, but my 102 fever and aching muscles made it a bit hard to get out of bed. I’ll do better.) I left meticulous plans and had the work graded with comments by the end of the evening. I’m sorry that was such an inconvenience.

Did you profusely thank every parent who may have been inconvenienced? Did you recognize the time they spent finding tutoring and getting their? The resources they lost paying those tutors? The hours they could have been spending in quality time with their children instead of teaching?

Doesn’t that say something about you if you didn’t?

Because thats how ridiculous your idea that a teacher is going above and beyond by providing material upon a students return is.

Teachers who go above and beyond absolutely deserve thanks and recognition and appreciation from parents (who should also send the praise to administrators). What you’re describing is not above and beyond.

I'm the parent of four kids, and I am surprised by the part of your statement that I bolded above.

Isn't it our job as parents to teach our children? Isn't that quality time spent with our children? I have always found tremendous value and fulfillment in reviewing content with my kids, helping them think a different way, providing them with additional resources related to an area of interest or study, asking them to teach me about a subject they're studying, etc. All of that is teaching, and I believe that is our job as parents.

We sometimes need to teach our kids a lesson they missed in school either because they just didn't get it, they were spaced out, they were absent, they thought they understood but then realized that they didn't, etc. Sitting with them to work on school work is treasured time, quality time.

The teachers have 150 kids. I have 4. They might not realize that my kid was acting like they understood, but my kid can't fool me. It's my job to help them learn.

There are elements of our job as parents that include teaching— in my family we send kids to Kindergarten able to read, for example, and there is lots of reinforcement and enrichment done at home.

But when a kid comes home and says I had a sub, and she let the class be wild/didn’t actually explain the material properly, and I have to drop whatever else was in the cards for that night, its an inconvenience and not what I consider quality time. Snuggling up to read to and with a four year old is certainly quality time, but if I was planning to craft with a 12 y/o and now were doing math instead, not so much.

But, I don’t expect to be thanked by the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And people wonder why teachers are leaving the profession.

Exactly.

I explain that requests for individualized work and after-school help sessions (in support of a vacation) is extra work. I’m happy to do it, but it is extra work. I had the —audacity— to say that a thank you seems appropriate. Not presents, a parade, or banners… 8 letters in an email.

And look at the parent responses. Harsh, right?

Incidentally, I am the type of thank people: my dentist, receptionists, etc. And I’ll continue to do so because I feel expressing appreciation when people help you is the right thing to do. The parents on this site won’t change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

I don’t know where you got this idea of “withholding”. When a teacher goes above and beyond for us, we make sure they’re recognized and appreciated. But the definition of above and beyond lies with the parent, not with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

If the vacation is excused, yes, your job. I don’t see how that impact your quality of life so much that you keep fixating on it. It’s very easy to get an excused absence if that’s really going to make you much happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

I don’t know where you got this idea of “withholding”. When a teacher goes above and beyond for us, we make sure they’re recognized and appreciated. But the definition of above and beyond lies with the parent, not with you.

Your responses don’t paint you as an appreciative person, or even a nice one:

“Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.”

This, after multiple illustrations of going “above and beyond.”

We remain different people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

I don’t know where you got this idea of “withholding”. When a teacher goes above and beyond for us, we make sure they’re recognized and appreciated. But the definition of above and beyond lies with the parent, not with you.

Your responses don’t paint you as an appreciative person, or even a nice one:

“Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.”

This, after multiple illustrations of going “above and beyond.”

We remain different people.

You’re right, I don’t need this level of validation for just doing my job. I understand that’s what the paycheck is for.

Again, the definition of above and beyond does not lie with you. You will be happier when you realize that. If the parents believe you’re going above and beyond, they will thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

If the vacation is excused, yes, your job. I don’t see how that impact your quality of life so much that you keep fixating on it. It’s very easy to get an excused absence if that’s really going to make you much happier.

How do you get the vacation excused?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

If the vacation is excused, yes, your job. I don’t see how that impact your quality of life so much that you keep fixating on it. It’s very easy to get an excused absence if that’s really going to make you much happier.

How do you get the vacation excused?

As examples (I have never needed to do any of these things) while traveling in Europe visit universities your high schooler may be interested in attending. For short breaks in the winter I would call in the child as being out for mental health (excused in FCPS) and for a longer trip our pediatrician would provide the “Name is under my care and will return on Date” note.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh I should add as well. Some of the best teaching I do as a parent is when we travel. Language, geography, history are all supported by raising kids who are aware of being in a wider world. I don’t ask teachers to thank me for that when I return either.

Why would they thank us for parenting? Everything you listed is what we should do as parents. Teachers dont need to thank us for parenting by teaching our kids when we travel any more than they need to thank us for toilet-training our children, supplying toothbrushes to our children, or clothing our children. It is our JOB as parents.

Agreed— and providing work to a child who has been absent is their JOB as teachers. No special thanks needed.

Well, there’s absences and there’s absences. Sick? Definitely my job to provide work. Vacation? No, not really… but I’ll do it anyway.

And there’s “providing work” and there’s teaching. If you want me to say, “check online! It’s there,” then I provided work. If you want me to stay after to teach the lesson to your child because he was on vacation, then that’s additional teaching.

So you can withhold your thanks in a “I’m going to stick it to that teacher” kind of way. That’s fine. Meanwhile, my daughter was sick earlier this week. I sent an email to her teacher, she responded with support, and I thanked her for it. It took me about 3 seconds.

We are different people.

If the vacation is excused, yes, your job. I don’t see how that impact your quality of life so much that you keep fixating on it. It’s very easy to get an excused absence if that’s really going to make you much happier.

How do you get the vacation excused?

A PP a few pages back said she would get a doctor's excuse for mental health or something like that.