Best schools -- middle school girls with HFA

[Anonymous]

What are the schools we should consider for a middle school aged girl who has always been mainstreamed with HFA but is nervous about the size of the large public middle school. Looking for a school that would provide social supports through challenges with processing speeds and anxiety and executive functioning related issues. DD is very bright, very social, actively engaged in many teams and clubs -- but displays clear challenges socially with regard to entering/joining groups verbally and participating in group academic projects. Developmentally a couple years younger than her actual grade level. In DC. Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Kingsbury

[Anonymous]

Holton-Arms. I recently met a girl with HFA who attends and she is doing well.

I also attended an all girls' school and think a single sex environment will work well for kids on the spectrum whose main issue is social.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Holton-Arms. I recently met a girl with HFA who attends and she is doing well.

I also attended an all girls' school and think a single sex environment will work well for kids on the spectrum whose main issue is social.

I don't know, all-girls schools can be brutal for neurotypical kids. I think it could be hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Holton-Arms. I recently met a girl with HFA who attends and she is doing well.

I also attended an all girls' school and think a single sex environment will work well for kids on the spectrum whose main issue is social.

I don't know, all-girls schools can be brutal for neurotypical kids. I think it could be hard.

It probably depends on the peer group and the grade. I loved my all girls' school and still have friends from hs who I still consider the sisters I never had.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP and I'm a huge fan of all -girls environments as I went to one for high school. But does Holton have any kids that need social supports like this? My DD is really bright, sweet, super engaged, but I don't want to downplay, the downsides -- I've heard Holton is super competitive. An intense, pressure filled environment would not be good for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and I'm a huge fan of all -girls environments as I went to one for high school. But does Holton have any kids that need social supports like this? My DD is really bright, sweet, super engaged, but I don't want to downplay, the downsides -- I've heard Holton is super competitive. An intense, pressure filled environment would not be good for her.

The girl I met goes to a social skills group outside school. For that age, I would highly recommend the PEERs program run by Dr Black and/or the unstuck and on target program run by Ivymount Outreach.

The all girls' school I attended was highly academic but the other side of it was that status also came from doing well academically and made up for deficiencies in other areas.

Unless you are looking at SN schools or a public school with IEP, you are not going to find any social supports at school. If what your DD needs is small class size and a nurturing environment, you should look at Field.

[Anonymous]

I went to Holton (admittedly 20 years ago! but yes it is a very competitive and high achieving environment. There were numerous AP scholars who took 5+ AP classes or exams and most people in my class went to top 15 schools. Lots of Harvard, Brown, Duke, Princeton, etc. It's also a school of primarily kids with a *lot* of financial resources. That wasn't the case for our family when we started and I remember feeling really odd about it. It's a lovely place and the teachers are wonderful but I would say the focus is on academics and getting into top colleges so I'm not sure how great it would be for someone who needed a bit more individual attention.

[Anonymous]

pp again - just re-read your last question and yes, it is intense and pressure-filled I think. Most everyone in my class excelled at something -either sports, academics or music or something and there was a focus on being the best of the best. Many of them were doctors, lawyers, or published authors by their early 30's.

[Anonymous]

^^ I have a HFA daughter and would not have considered Holton at all for her. FCPS with an IEP worked well. I understand OP's concern about anxiety (DD has GAD as well) but we thought DD could make the transition to college better had she had some years with very large classes in high school. For her, it worked. She got all As and Bs and is now in a huge university so there was no transition shock. Just a thought. Every child is different.

[Anonymous]

To 20:11 did your daughter do ok socially? I see the bigger pool of kids actually as a plus if my dd can navigate public. Maybe there will be other quirky kids like her. What was challenging about the public environment and what do you wish you had known?

[Anonymous]

21:25 She did OK. She found a group of geeky friends plus friends in her athletic team and specialty subject matter. She was not Miss Congeniality but with 2200 kids or so she definitely found buddies whom she keeps in contact with. One went on to be her roommate in college which was fantastic! But public can be overwhelming for some HFAs due to the crush of kids, noise, bells, etc. So your results may vary. The IEP certainly helped. She was not in contained classrooms so was mainstreamed and had a second teacher in each classroom which significantly helped in upper level math and science courses. I would definitely do it the same way again. I would not do it with a 504, however. With an autism diagnosis you should get an IEP but you may have to fight for it. She got As and Bs and did well enough to get into a good university EA. Transition to university had its ups and downs but nothing like it would have been had she stayed in a small SN school. On the other hand, we have a younger child who is in a wonderfull small SN school right now. For that child, it works. But I know that child will have zero transition problems and is less disabled.