Incredibly “busy” 2 and 4 year old.. can hardly keep up with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am honestly just venting. I am happy they are healthy boys but TBH I am super jealous of people with kids who are more chill in general.

OP my kids were the same way. It was exhausting but it's just their hard wiring. Can you get a little indoor trampoline and some tumbling mats?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am not diagnosing your children, but you should look into resources for parents of young children with ADHD, because even if your children are neurotypical and don’t have ADHD, you still need to find out how to deal with children with tons of energy, short attention spans, poor impulse control, and lots of risk taking.

This. You keep saying "high energy," Op, but it sounds like that's just one of the issues.

Yah I have looked into it and their pedi says no, at this time she doesn’t think so. They are too young to evaluate.
I can’t tell if you’re being helpful or critical. I already see a few friends talking about adhd like it’s a dirty word, talking about other people’s kids. It’s a fine line to walk and if we do get a diagnosis for something down the road, I sincerely hope I don’t deal with that from my community of mom friends.

Not trying to be critical. All kids have to deal with learning how to impulse control, though it sounds like you have it a lot harder than most. I just think instead of trying to figure out ways for them to burn energy, it was a very good suggestion to research ways to help them with their impulse control and risk taking. Wish I had more specific suggestions in this area, but perhaps something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Mom of two active boys here. I have four suggestions:

1: Long stretches of outside time. Twice a day, every day. Get up, eat breakfast, go outside. Do the same after lunch/rest time. Time them doing wind sprints. Find the steepest hill in your neighborhood and challenge them to skip/march/run up and sidestep/walk backwards down, as many times as they can. Go for long, long hikes and bike rides. Teach them to do somersaults, cartwheels and handstands. Put on sandals/boots/old shoes and play in the creek.

2: You need to find ways to get them to play *with* each other, not just mindlessly feed off each others’ energy. Follow-the-leader, wheelbarrow courses, piggyback or horsie rides, squirt guns. Help them build a fort with tree branches or bamboo, then set them digging a moat or tiger pit outside it. Help them connect body and brain, to improve their motor planning and executive functioning skills.

3: Find things to say yes to and cheerfully redirect when necessary. Celebrate their physicality and daring, but in ways that aren’t destructive. Jumping off the deck, no. Competitive broad jumps on the sidewalk, sure. Squirting mom’s laptop when she’s working, no. Painting each other with fingerpaints and mud in the driveway, then hosing each other down, why not? Jumping off the couch — absolutely not. Putting the cushions on the floor for hot lava — go for it.

4: Involve them in cleaning up any destructive messes. They got into a flour war in the kitchen? One sweeps while the other holds the dustpan. Marks on the walls? Each gets a paintbrush or roller. Something gets broken? They need to spend time to help you repair it or find a new one.

Make peace with the reality that you will never have quiet, craft-loving kids. But you will have so much more fun if you cheer for the kids you do have.

[Anonymous]

I think some of their behavior is just "busy, active" kids - hanging from a chandelier after climbing on diningroom table might be outside that norm, though. But... for a kid who climbs, THEY don't see this as a big deal, just fun.

May I make a suggestion? Serve breakfast, then get them outside for 2 hours. TWO HOURS. Take them to a baseball field and bring 2 balls and they can kick the ball all over kingdom come and chase it and do it again. use backyard, with balls, painting, I hope you have a climbing gym or a climber or something there for them to use.

But I'm serious, they need to be run uphill for 2 hours straight. EXHAUST them. Kinesthetic kids just go, go, go, go ad infinitum and they need to be outside.

get a sandbox in your yard, kids will love making moats, carrying water from the hose to the sandbox, dig canals, moats, etc. Have them carry water in small buckets to sandbox to make it wet, NOT give them a hose and get it wet in seconds. See? I know the hose would be easier but that's the POINT - they need to get exercise so the carrying back and forth will give then exercise, fulfill their cognitive needs, and it will be fun for them, too.

So build in exercise in everything you do.

paint with water on fence (I love the idea of yellow food coloring in that water, though)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Last 8 minutes.
Set up fingerpaint in yard, 20 feet from front door and nicer white limestone porch.
Kids jump feet first to foot paint and run towards white limestone and stomp all over it.
Run to the water table, we have hose going, 3 year old sprays all of us, kids stripped down to underwear diaper. Little one takes diaper off himself with crap running down his leg. Big mess.8 minutes of activity. Soaked, paint all over them, and now bored. 8 minutes. Now imagine the day and what that is like with these kinds of kids.

It sounds like your older kid is more impulsive than what is typical. Hard to say about a one year old, but he sounds atypical too. That said, why did the painting and hose play end there? That sounds like a fantastic way for them to get out their energy. Work with what you've got. Hanging from the chandelier? Shut it down. Painting and playing at a water table and with the hose? Totally acceptable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last 8 minutes.
Set up fingerpaint in yard, 20 feet from front door and nicer white limestone porch.
Kids jump feet first to foot paint and run towards white limestone and stomp all over it.
Run to the water table, we have hose going, 3 year old sprays all of us, kids stripped down to underwear diaper. Little one takes diaper off himself with crap running down his leg. Big mess.8 minutes of activity. Soaked, paint all over them, and now bored. 8 minutes. Now imagine the day and what that is like with these kinds of kids.

It sounds like your older kid is more impulsive than what is typical. Hard to say about a one year old, but he sounds atypical too. That said, why did the painting and hose play end there? That sounds like a fantastic way for them to get out their energy. Work with what you've got. Hanging from the chandelier? Shut it down. Painting and playing at a water table and with the hose? Totally acceptable.

So what’s your armchair diagnosis.. you said dh sh are atypical.. what are you diagnosing them with?

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry. I have two boys that were like this at that age and I totally get you. It is completely exhausting. My oldest was later diagnosed with ADHD, just FYI to keep an eye on. My solution was to spend almost all of our time out of the house. We lived in California so luckily we were able to spend 4 or more hours at various parks every day year round. We would occasionally mix things up with a play place. I would heavily invest in outdoor toys and take many, many walks every day.

[Anonymous]

My DD’s little friend is like this. They took every stick of furniture out of the living room. The next day they found him on top of the fireplace mantle. He was 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last 8 minutes.
Set up fingerpaint in yard, 20 feet from front door and nicer white limestone porch.
Kids jump feet first to foot paint and run towards white limestone and stomp all over it.
Run to the water table, we have hose going, 3 year old sprays all of us, kids stripped down to underwear diaper. Little one takes diaper off himself with crap running down his leg. Big mess.8 minutes of activity. Soaked, paint all over them, and now bored. 8 minutes. Now imagine the day and what that is like with these kinds of kids.

It sounds like your older kid is more impulsive than what is typical. Hard to say about a one year old, but he sounds atypical too. That said, why did the painting and hose play end there? That sounds like a fantastic way for them to get out their energy. Work with what you've got. Hanging from the chandelier? Shut it down. Painting and playing at a water table and with the hose? Totally acceptable.

So what’s your armchair diagnosis.. you said dh sh are atypical.. what are you diagnosing them with?

I don't have a diagnosis, I'm a stranger on the internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD’s little friend is like this. They took every stick of furniture out of the living room. The next day they found him on top of the fireplace mantle. He was 2.

Oh man. I found my 20 month old on the mantle today. He pushed a side table over and climbed. We are on him like white on rice but he just is... adventurous. We love it and do encourage it because it’s his true nature. It’s tiring though. I do think if he had an older wild brother, he’d be 10x worse. As it is, he had a very mellow, gentle older sister. Tonight he begged for his toes to be painted navy because she had hers done. He also “tries” a lot more arts and crafts than I’m sure he’d like. He also sits through princess films and gentle books (he would prefer the poop book!). I think they all have essential natures but I do think there’s wiggle room in making them see other ways. My boy is WILD. He’s 75th percentile weight and 100th height. I know he’ll be a big wild guy too. I just hope to make sure he’s well rounded when he makes it there. My husband is extremely athletic (I can tell my kids have his body type) but neither of us were wild. I loved books and dolls. Hah

I would also think you’re lucky that your boys have each other to get in trouble and get wild with. Just channel it outside if you can.

Anyways, bounce houses, obstacle courses, balance bikes (mine can already ride a trike full speed), and slip and slides. Jello “digs” have been a huge hit (make jello in a casserole dish and put dinosaurs and trucks in)1 and legos. My son loves legos already and I know it’s young but it really entertains. We really need walks twice a day.

[Anonymous]

I found my 17 month old on top of the fridge today. 3 year old DS is energetic, but OMG youngest is next level. We were so spoiled with DD #1 now 5.5.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know how you all do it. Not a criticism, true awe. I have two girls. Whiny, high drama but none of this stuff. If I said “stand here I’ll be right back” they just...did. I don’t know why they listened. I’m not some super mom or anything. I honestly wanted a third kid but was too afraid to press my luck.