I am exhausted with a sick baby and husband is no help.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Just go to bed. Tell husband you are going to bed. Shut your door. First time moms never understand this concept. Just take the time and let DH figure it out.


+1

I don’t understand this. How are you not in his face saying “get your a** off this couch and go do the laundry covered in feces and clean the baby. I have two skewers poking through my head and I must lie down for four hours.”. Don’t believe all these new age theories that you should always be “respectful and understanding”. Sometimes you have to hit the man-baby with a proverbial two-by-four. I do this rarely, but when I do my husband knows that this is not up for debate.


Pretty much this right here.
Anonymous
Yes men will try to weasel out of helping. Tale as old as time.

I learned early on to just act like a man- at times. Just go- shower, to bed, our, whatever you need at the time. The kid will still be alive when you return! Magically they will handle it, if you aren’t available.

So...go crawl into bed! Wear earplugs if you need to. Don’t be lured out by DH pretending to need your help ( he doesn’t!!!)

Feel better soon.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I will tell you this. You have not got it bad. Try doing this with twins or three under three.

Your husband has a job that pays for you and the baby to stay home and be sick. Let him sleep and work.

Seriously.

And yes, I'm a mom who had 2 under 2 and all 4 of us vomiting at once!



Wow, not OP but I have a 3yo and 1yo Twins and I would never say this to another mom! This is not a “martyrdom” or suffering olympics!

OP - get a mother’s helper and a babysitter ASAP for situations like this, if you can afford it. If not, you need to at least get a nap yourself. If you are sick, it’s even worse for everyone.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I will tell you this. You have not got it bad. Try doing this with twins or three under three.

Your husband has a job that pays for you and the baby to stay home and be sick. Let him sleep and work.

Seriously.

And yes, I'm a mom who had 2 under 2 and all 4 of us vomiting at once!


I’m sorry you hate your life.


Not at all. My life is fantastic. Life is not a week of illness, numb-nuts.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I will tell you this. You have not got it bad. Try doing this with twins or three under three.

Your husband has a job that pays for you and the baby to stay home and be sick. Let him sleep and work.

Seriously.

And yes, I'm a mom who had 2 under 2 and all 4 of us vomiting at once!


I think you must’ve vomited up your compassion as well while you were at it.


The thing is that pp sort of has a point. There are plenty of times where a sick parent has to take care of sick kids. OP only has 1 baby.


I think neither of you should have had children because you lost your humanity and decency in the process. And if you never had those things then you definitely shouldn’t have had kids.

I really hope you have family or a nanny with humanity because otherwise your kids are screwed.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I will tell you this. You have not got it bad. Try doing this with twins or three under three.

Your husband has a job that pays for you and the baby to stay home and be sick. Let him sleep and work.

Seriously.

And yes, I'm a mom who had 2 under 2 and all 4 of us vomiting at once!



Wow, not OP but I have a 3yo and 1yo Twins and I would never say this to another mom! This is not a “martyrdom” or suffering olympics!

OP - get a mother’s helper and a babysitter ASAP for situations like this, if you can afford it. If not, you need to at least get a nap yourself. If you are sick, it’s even worse for everyone.


I'm sorry but no, it's not fair to expose a part time employee to a puking baby. I have help and would give her paid time off if the baby is sick to this extent - no use exposing non family members.

The husband needs to step up when his wife is ill.
Anonymous
You need to tell your DH that you have to take a nap-- you have a migraine and have been non-stop cleaning vomit and poop.

He will need to take care of the baby and finish some of the cleaning. You will help when the Advil has kicked in and you've gotten some rest.

Then, you just do it. Sometimes a partner needs to grow up--the way to make that happen is similar to how you help teens grow up. You stop letting them make their immaturity into your problem-- you make them figure it out.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You need to tell your DH that you have to take a nap-- you have a migraine and have been non-stop cleaning vomit and poop.

He will need to take care of the baby and finish some of the cleaning. You will help when the Advil has kicked in and you've gotten some rest.

Then, you just do it. Sometimes a partner needs to grow up--the way to make that happen is similar to how you help teens grow up. You stop letting them make their immaturity into your problem-- you make them figure it out.



....and yes, we hope that we've married fully mature humans, but often we haven't. Kids are a the next level when it comes to personal growth and selflessness. Your DH hasn't learned this yet-- and he won't if you keep doing what you're doing.
Anonymous
You called him to come home early- sounds like he did and you didn't hand him the baby and get into bed? At this point he cut short his work for no reason.

He made his needs clear- he wants to take a nap. Not sure why you didn't do the same by meeting him at the door with the baby, giving him a quick run down of the day/where you are at with laundry and head to bed.

You will need to be more clear with your communication, especially if you do have a few more kids. I've been there, done that and when my DH has walked in the door, if I'm in need I don't fake that I'm OK. I tell the truth and ask clearly for what we all need.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I will tell you this. You have not got it bad. Try doing this with twins or three under three.

Your husband has a job that pays for you and the baby to stay home and be sick. Let him sleep and work.

Seriously.

And yes, I'm a mom who had 2 under 2 and all 4 of us vomiting at once!


I’m sorry you hate your life.


Not at all. My life is fantastic. Life is not a week of illness, numb-nuts.


I’m pretty sure if it was fantastic you wouldn’t be on here acting like a jerk.
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