Working in the Abu Dhabi

[Anonymous]

I am considering moving to the UAE as well for 2-3 years to save up some money. I work in higher ed.

I have two friends who went as single women who work there as nurses. They said about 85% of the population are foreigners so it is a very different feel from being in the middle east. They live in their own bubble -all of their friends and their entire circle are other foreign nurses. The expat community is very welcoming. It isn't really a cultural experience like it is to move to many cultures - other than the cultural experience of the UAE. They haven't found it difficult o be there as single women.

[Anonymous]

I lived in Abu Dhabi for 3 years - I'm a white married woman and worked while I was there. I had zero negative experiences as a woman - no lewd looks, no rude language, etc. Many other places (Egypt, KSA) are much worse for foreign women.

I wholly agree with others who mention race/nationality hierarchy. My non-white American friends had many negative experiences.

Run your costs carefully. Benefit packages that sound good from here may not be enough to cover housing, school fees, etc.

AD is a great city for families - Emiratis and other Arabs are very indulgent of their kids and you can take your kids everywhere/anytime. Lots of fun kids activities, pocket parks, beaches, etc.

It is ungodly hot in the summer - when I moved back to DC the 100 degree summer weather felt cool to me. UAE is 100-140 degrees and high humidity from May-October. Everyone spends all their time indoors or out of the country. Winter is 65-80 and sunny - lovely!

Travel opportunities are amazing - you can get almost anywhere in the world nonstop from Dubai.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope. I lived there for three years and it was the worst. Especially as a woman.

+1

As an American woman, can you lay out how day to day life can be horrible?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think there will be a culture shock.

They live like Americans. Cars, malls, restaurants etc.

I would absolutely accept a job there, life is very pleasant.

Your wife and daughters will be fine.

I lived in Kuwait as a single woman and it was incredibly boring there. No drinking (not that I am a big drinker but when there isn't much to do...), no sunbathing on the beach unless fully clothed, not much to do except go to overpriced shopping malls and drink coffee. Even the movies were censored so the movies I'd like to see didn't make much sense after the censor cut them up. Now, the traveling was very good. I went to Egypt, Dubai and Oman the year I was there and enjoyed all three. But Kuwait was just dull.

[Anonymous]

PP here. I also forgot to mention that it was a bit unsettling spending time around foreign men. Most of the population was from India and the Philippines but those men were respectful toward us women. It was the Arab men who leered at us and stopped their cars when we were walking, etc. We dressed conservatively but not covered but this is how all of the foreign women (not Muslim) dressed.

[Anonymous]

A lot of the women on this thread are not realistic about what living in a foreign country means. Living in a foreign country means you are an outsider- therefore your opinions on racism, women’s rights, etc. do not matter. It is not “complicit” to live there but no, you do not have the legal rights that you do in your own country. Your safety and well being sort of rest on the United States’ standing. If God forbid you were to be assaulted, etc, you probably would be in trouble yourself and not get justice. This is how much of the world works. Either you tolerate the risk, however small, or you stay home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think there will be a culture shock.

They live like Americans. Cars, malls, restaurants etc.

I would absolutely accept a job there, life is very pleasant.

Your wife and daughters will be fine.

I lived in Kuwait as a single woman and it was incredibly boring there. No drinking (not that I am a big drinker but when there isn't much to do...), no sunbathing on the beach unless fully clothed, not much to do except go to overpriced shopping malls and drink coffee. Even the movies were censored so the movies I'd like to see didn't make much sense after the censor cut them up. Now, the traveling was very good. I went to Egypt, Dubai and Oman the year I was there and enjoyed all three. But Kuwait was just dull.

Other people I know who lived in Kuwait said the same. It’s not you, it’s not a place to make memories.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if you’re treated like royalty, you’ll be honored guests in an oppressive slaver culture.

My friends lived there and they said their children were the only kids in their class who treated their nanny like a human being, and actually saw the nanny as being in charge of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the PPs here are posting nonsense. I live in the region and am very familiar with the UAE. You and your family will be in an expat community and school and, if you choose to go for this, will have a lovely time. You can enjoy a ton of travel within the region given your vacation time. Your wife and daughters will not be treated like "second class citizens" as the expat life is very separate from the situation for locals and the dynamics of Asian and African laborers coming from developing countries. My only caution would be the heat- the only outside activity possible for much of the year is the pool! I say go for it if it makes financial sense.

+1 This. Having moved overseas from an expensive part of the DMV with overcrowded public schools, it's so nice to have a high quality private school paid for by an employer, inexpensive household help and really amazing travel opportunities. It's a nice life for both adults and kids.

[Anonymous]

Completely anecdotal but my college boyfriend’s parents moved to Dubai for work, wife was black, husband white, and their youngest was in middle school at the time and went with them. They had a grand time. They lived in an expat compound where the wife described the community swimming pool as an odd mix of Muslim women/girls wearing burkinis and French pre purberty girls swimming topless and pretty much everything in between. Their son got sent to a top notch American private school there. Wife did make comments on the strange habits of the local men when interacting with her such as they wouldn’t look her in the eye...but I don’t recall her mentioning anything horrible or very poor treatment happening. They stayed for several years.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you everyone for the valuable insight while minimizing the snark. If this thread were a yelp review, I’m guessing it’s hovering around 2.5-2.8 stars at best. At this point, this role and location doesn’t seem the right fit for us at this time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you everyone for the valuable insight while minimizing the snark. If this thread were a yelp review, I’m guessing it’s hovering around 2.5-2.8 stars at best. At this point, this role and location doesn’t seem the right fit for us at this time.

Too bad it's not the right fit for you right now.

I would absolutely go there if I were offered a job.
I went once for a vacation and loved it.
People were really nice, you feel safe all the time.
There's fantastic shopping (lots of malls), beautiful hotels (check out bab al shams, pure heaven in the middle of the desert).
On my way to that hotel I stopped on the street to say hi to a couple of men who were riding camels.
They came down to talk to us, didn't speak a word of English (or my own language) but they were so nice, let us take pictures with the camels and
then invited us to visit the camel farm. A moment I will always cherish.
And let's talk about the caribbean blue water ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH and I lived and worked there for three years. As a white woman, whenever/wherever I went alone, I was routinely called a whore, slut, etc. My brown and black expat friends experienced much worse racism. ALSO: The HEAT. If you enjoy living in an oven, you'll be fine. Think Phoenix on steroids. The best part of the UAE, however, is its location. You truly are in the center of the world and traveling elsewhere is great.

Most (white) expats who lived there and loved it are the ones who cloistered themselves off in (white) expat-only communities and pretended to live like royals. Pretty disgusting.

Because that never happens in the US.

I'd advise you to not live like this in the U.S. or the middle east.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even if you’re treated like royalty, you’ll be honored guests in an oppressive slaver culture.

My friends lived there and they said their children were the only kids in their class who treated their nanny like a human being, and actually saw the nanny as being in charge of them.

Kuwait poster here. I worked as a teacher in a school there and was appalled at how the students treated their nannies and drivers and maids. They bragged about how they would drop their trash on the ground and the maids would clean up behind them. They would see their nannies or drivers coming toward them to pick them up school and they would literally drop their backpacks in the ground as they walked past them and the nanny or driver would pick
it up. It was disgusting behavior IMO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely go for it! UAE is beautiful and adventurous. It’s open and welcoming to foreigners. Your kids will probably attend a British School or International school. Both good options. I would go in a heartbeat. By the way, their houses are huge and your wife will be able to hire an affordable nanny to help.

+1. Depending on her field, she may also be able to find work as well.