U9 and washed up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a rec coach (and former D2 player and had an E license). Half my little guys were great and the other half were as described here...disrupters...no interest in any sport...on the spectrum...overweight...Ruined it for the other half who were mostly interested and excited to be there. Parents, be honest with yourselves about your kids...You know good and well if they are not meant for sports. Not everyone is and that's fine. No need to ruin it for others (UNLESS you volunteer to assist during practice and keep those kids under control so others can learn!) — former trained and engaged rec coach

Please don't ever coach again. It's fine to complain about having to coach disruptive kids but kids who are overweight or on the spectrum? Those kids "ruined it"? How can you say or think that stuff and look at yourself in the mirror?

The most disruptive kids in DS's rec team were skinny, spoiled neurotypical kids who look like angels. The kids with special needs and the slightly chunky ones were really sweet and followed directions well.

Well, but that can be your kids’ rec coach all too often - that guy right there. He probably shoved a bunch of parents with some soccer knowledge and skills and an actual soul out of the way so that his ‘greatness’ could coach. He sacrificed for your kids That’s why some of us can’t stand rec level for our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think you should ever rely on any coach or program to develop your child. Kids need development at home with a parent guiding the way (how much guidance and in what form depends on the kid-parent relationship). Even if you don't have much of a background in the sport, go to online videos to research drills and skills practice. Playing with friends in the backyard can also help immensely. Yes, travel and rec are required to get game experience in, but a large part of development is just working on skills on your own and playing with other friends who like the sport in the backyard.

Once parents take more ownership of their child's development and take a long view of the development process, you tend to be less obsessed with a season here or there that didn't work out as well with a certain coach/team/situation.

No one plays in their backyard anymore. And, I cringe at the thought of a parent taking "ownership" as described in this post.

While I believe that parents are important as a support system for the young soccer player, the whole point of a coach (and a teacher) is to help develop your child in that field. Can you rely upon them as a sole means? No. However, they should be competent enough to teach the kids basics about the sport, and even more than that if they are paid "professional" coaches. It is also good to have the kid separated from the family dynamic when trying to learn a sport.

Please see the bolded above. I think we are on the same page. My point was to encourage parents to not always look to blame a coach or program when they're child isn't developing the way they hoped and understand that some coaches and programs are better than others. You may not always be able to figure out which is better/worse or may not even have access all the time to the good coaches, so you have to be able to let your kid develop independent of that and not just put all your eggs in one basket.

As far as my comment on pick up soccer - that's how all the South American players become to be so good and creative. Kids there aren't signing up for travel teams and playing tons of games/tournaments and attending multiple camps. Google "pick up soccer youth development" and you'll see alot on this topic.

And how often are you , the coach , out there at pickup soccer? YOU should stop reading about ‘south americans’ and their soccer and get your rear out there to play at least once a week. Even with the South Americans (& everyone else) - don’t be afraid. You have a lot to learn. Stop reading & start doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think you should ever rely on any coach or program to develop your child. Kids need development at home with a parent guiding the way (how much guidance and in what form depends on the kid-parent relationship). Even if you don't have much of a background in the sport, go to online videos to research drills and skills practice. Playing with friends in the backyard can also help immensely. Yes, travel and rec are required to get game experience in, but a large part of development is just working on skills on your own and playing with other friends who like the sport in the backyard.

Once parents take more ownership of their child's development and take a long view of the development process, you tend to be less obsessed with a season here or there that didn't work out as well with a certain coach/team/situation.


[/quote

Yikes, don't want to be near any team you are a part of....

Why? I think that it is common sense. If you believe you can just drop your child off at practice and do nothing more, you are part of the problem. Why would you think that your child would not have to continue to work on his or her skills between regular practices? Is asking you as a parent to work with your child too much to ask? Is encouraging your child to play a pick up game in the backyard or the park too much to ask? I believe this is the point of parents taking some ownership/responsibility in the situation, not just expecting the coach to make your child a great player.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think you should ever rely on any coach or program to develop your child. Kids need development at home with a parent guiding the way (how much guidance and in what form depends on the kid-parent relationship). Even if you don't have much of a background in the sport, go to online videos to research drills and skills practice. Playing with friends in the backyard can also help immensely. Yes, travel and rec are required to get game experience in, but a large part of development is just working on skills on your own and playing with other friends who like the sport in the backyard.

Once parents take more ownership of their child's development and take a long view of the development process, you tend to be less obsessed with a season here or there that didn't work out as well with a certain coach/team/situation.

No one plays in their backyard anymore. And, I cringe at the thought of a parent taking "ownership" as described in this post.

While I believe that parents are important as a support system for the young soccer player, the whole point of a coach (and a teacher) is to help develop your child in that field. Can you rely upon them as a sole means? No. However, they should be competent enough to teach the kids basics about the sport, and even more than that if they are paid "professional" coaches. It is also good to have the kid separated from the family dynamic when trying to learn a sport.

Please see the bolded above. I think we are on the same page. My point was to encourage parents to not always look to blame a coach or program when they're child isn't developing the way they hoped and understand that some coaches and programs are better than others. You may not always be able to figure out which is better/worse or may not even have access all the time to the good coaches, so you have to be able to let your kid develop independent of that and not just put all your eggs in one basket.

As far as my comment on pick up soccer - that's how all the South American players become to be so good and creative. Kids there aren't signing up for travel teams and playing tons of games/tournaments and attending multiple camps. Google "pick up soccer youth development" and you'll see alot on this topic.

And how often are you , the coach , out there at pickup soccer? YOU should stop reading about ‘south americans’ and their soccer and get your rear out there to play at least once a week. Even with the South Americans (& everyone else) - don’t be afraid. You have a lot to learn. Stop reading & start doing.

This is just amazing, this thread is so full of entitlement. Expecting the coach to come to your house to play with your child. Wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was a rec coach (and former D2 player and had an E license). Half my little guys were great and the other half were as described here...disrupters...no interest in any sport...on the spectrum...overweight...Ruined it for the other half who were mostly interested and excited to be there. Parents, be honest with yourselves about your kids...You know good and well if they are not meant for sports. Not everyone is and that's fine. No need to ruin it for others (UNLESS you volunteer to assist during practice and keep those kids under control so others can learn!) — former trained and engaged rec coach

Please don't ever coach again. It's fine to complain about having to coach disruptive kids but kids who are overweight or on the spectrum? Those kids "ruined it"? How can you say or think that stuff and look at yourself in the mirror?

The most disruptive kids in DS's rec team were skinny, spoiled neurotypical kids who look like angels. The kids with special needs and the slightly chunky ones were really sweet and followed directions well.

Well, but that can be your kids’ rec coach all too often - that guy right there. He probably shoved a bunch of parents with some soccer knowledge and skills and an actual soul out of the way so that his ‘greatness’ could coach. He sacrificed for your kids That’s why some of us can’t stand rec level for our kids.

No, that's not what I did. None of the parents had any soccer knowledge or skills and of course, not one volunteered for anything, much less coaching. The overweight kid did not want to be there and would often just sit down in the middle of drill. The kid on the spectrum would pick up the goals and throw them off the pitch. He was triggered by touch and loud noises. Not only did the parent not step in, but the parent NEVER TOLD ME the kid was on the spectrum. Luckily, he did finally pull the kid off the team, which was when I was told he was on the spectrum. When I asked the parent why he didn't tell me that on day one so i could have prepared, the parent responded that he just wanted to see how his kid would do in a normal setting.

[Anonymous]

So sad. This thread has done what DCUM threads often do: turn into something totally not about the original topic.

Can anyone share if there is an MSI Classic type league in Arlington or Alexandria City? We live in Shirlington. McLean and Reston are too far out for us. We’re looking for a step above rec league but more of a focus on development than a travel league. TIA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with keeping your kid out of travel at u9 but they tend to fall behind. If you wait 3 years to put your DC in travel, everyone else has had proper training and you tend to be playing catch up unless your kid is naturally talented. They are getting zero development or competition at the rec level, its mostly for the fun aspect.

3 years of missed high level training at those crucial 9 - 11 years, and your kid will never catch up. My DS was in 3x week team training and at least 1x week 1:1 private training on nothing but technical skills during that time period (ages 9 - 11). And so is just about every else that will make the 'A' team. You can never make that time up. If you are serious about the sport, you cannot opt out as is suggested above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with keeping your kid out of travel at u9 but they tend to fall behind. If you wait 3 years to put your DC in travel, everyone else has had proper training and you tend to be playing catch up unless your kid is naturally talented. They are getting zero development or competition at the rec level, its mostly for the fun aspect.

3 years of missed high level training at those crucial 9 - 11 years, and your kid will never catch up. My DS was in 3x week team training and at least 1x week 1:1 private training on nothing but technical skills during that time period (ages 9 - 11). And so is just about every else that will make the 'A' team. You can never make that time up. If you are serious about the sport, you cannot opt out as is suggested above.

Sorry, but catch up to what? Playing on high school teams? What does being “serious” mean? My Ds has no desire to play professionally. He just enjoys the game and wants to play as well as he can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So sad. This thread has done what DCUM threads often do: turn into something totally not about the original topic.

Can anyone share if there is an MSI Classic type league in Arlington or Alexandria City? We live in Shirlington. McLean and Reston are too far out for us. We’re looking for a step above rec league but more of a focus on development than a travel league. TIA.

Yes, Arlington has a mid-level league that only plays in Arlington called Arlington Development Program, aka ADP. 2 practices a week, a professional coach at one, a volunteer at another - relatively cheap and high level of competition. Some of the teams are competitive with Arlington's lower travel teams. It's on the website ASA website.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with keeping your kid out of travel at u9 but they tend to fall behind. If you wait 3 years to put your DC in travel, everyone else has had proper training and you tend to be playing catch up unless your kid is naturally talented. They are getting zero development or competition at the rec level, its mostly for the fun aspect.

3 years of missed high level training at those crucial 9 - 11 years, and your kid will never catch up. My DS was in 3x week team training and at least 1x week 1:1 private training on nothing but technical skills during that time period (ages 9 - 11). And so is just about every else that will make the 'A' team. You can never make that time up. If you are serious about the sport, you cannot opt out as is suggested above.

Sorry, but catch up to what? Playing on high school teams? What does being “serious” mean? My Ds has no desire to play professionally. He just enjoys the game and wants to play as well as he can.

Even HS soccer requires having to have played travel soccer.

Why does everyone equate taking a sport "serious" with going "Pro" all the time. It gets so old to hear people say that this doesn't matter or that doesn't matter because "they aren't going Pro anyway".

I think most parents understand this. But, if soccer is to be enjoyed then it needs to be taken seriously to a point. As your kids get older you will learn that if they love playing, but are not on a quality team then they will get frustrated with their teammates lack of commitment, skill and game IQ. Kids not showing up to games etc...

You do not need spend every waking hour training but soccer is just not a sport that kids walk into at 14 years old and pick up like they can other American sports.

That is all the PP is really getting at. The game does not resemble the rec game that you currently see at young ages as they get older. It would be like playing T-Ball until 8 years old and then deciding 14 to get back into baseball. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with keeping your kid out of travel at u9 but they tend to fall behind. If you wait 3 years to put your DC in travel, everyone else has had proper training and you tend to be playing catch up unless your kid is naturally talented. They are getting zero development or competition at the rec level, its mostly for the fun aspect.

3 years of missed high level training at those crucial 9 - 11 years, and your kid will never catch up. My DS was in 3x week team training and at least 1x week 1:1 private training on nothing but technical skills during that time period (ages 9 - 11). And so is just about every else that will make the 'A' team. You can never make that time up. If you are serious about the sport, you cannot opt out as is suggested above.

Sorry, but catch up to what? Playing on high school teams? What does being “serious” mean? My Ds has no desire to play professionally. He just enjoys the game and wants to play as well as he can.

So he/she can play on a lower level travel team or stay on a rec. He/she will not walk on to a top travel team at u12 or older after only playing rec. Rec and travel are different sports. Chances of making high school? It depends on how many travel kids tryout but not high. It’s really competitive. The only exception is if your kid is a freak athlete. I am talking fast quick explosive with size ...as in beats all kids by a large margin at any distance. You would already know if you had a kid like that. Coaches will always try to train them up.