At what age did you leave your teen overnight for the first time?

[Anonymous]

College. There were three of us growing up and we were all very good, mature, responsible kids. One sibling rarely ever went out with friends and was a homebody. All 3 of us had boyfriends or girlfriends (my brother) over when my parents were not there.

[Anonymous]

At the time I could afford a lawyer for the party they had when I wasn't there. So, 15.

[Anonymous]

My 14 year old has the right "resume" also but I don't think I would even think about it for another few years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not until college. mostly my son told me his friends would find out and a party would happen and he didn't think he would stop it.

But if you kid that doesn't have that issue I would say Junior year.

Also not until college —mainly because of the risk of involuntary parties, but also because I experienced a scary espiside with a lurker when my mom left me overnight in HS.

[Anonymous]

My parents allowed me to stay in the house alone overnight when I was 15. My grandmother lived down the street and kept an eye on me, so I wasn’t truly unsupervised. I told a friend that my grandmother had evening plans, the friend told her older brother, and they showed up with a bunch of friends and a case of beer and some pot. I was not mature or assertive enough to tell them to go the hell away. I was humiliated to get “caught” but I’m glad my grandmother came home and handled it.

[Anonymous]

We left my 15 year old daughter home alone for one night. It was sort of last minute that my husband and I realized that we'd both be away. We live in a community where the houses are very close, and my friend said she'd stop by and check on her in the evening and that my daughter was welcome to sleep there if she got scared. Withing the first hour of being home the fire alarm battery went off, so she called my friend, and her husband came over and removed the battery. Other than that, it all went smoothly. She also had our small dog with her.

[Anonymous]

My kid is 14 and would not cause problems. No way would I leave overnight. I am relaxed but home before 11 pm. That said. I was left alone at age 16 in NYC with my brother who was 14 and it was fine. Our neighbor checked in on us morning and night and the Doorman had our backs. Alone, in a house, I’d have freaked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents allowed me to stay in the house alone overnight when I was 15. My grandmother lived down the street and kept an eye on me, so I wasn’t truly unsupervised. I told a friend that my grandmother had evening plans, the friend told her older brother, and they showed up with a bunch of friends and a case of beer and some pot. I was not mature or assertive enough to tell them to go the hell away. I was humiliated to get “caught” but I’m glad my grandmother came home and handled it.

This is exactly what I’d worry about happening. Your kid could be the best one around, but can he handle a situation like this? If some older kids come by and wreck the place or the cops are called, your 14 yr old will feel terrible that he “let” it happen— when really he was just too young to know how to handle the situation. I wouldn’t want to do that to my kid.

[Anonymous]

17.

[Anonymous]

We left a 14 year old alone overnight. It just worked out that way. I had a flight out that day, and my husband wasn’t returning until the next day. It was a school night, and he’s in a rigorous program. What is he going to do? Our biggest concern was him oversleeping. If he weren’t comfortable, we wouldn’t have done it. But he preferred it to the awkwardness of staying overnight with others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not until college. I would leave them alone and ask my sister to sleep over or ask one of the kid's friends to bunk them.

One of my issues is how soundly teens sleep. Smoke detectors could be going off and they would sleep through it all.

+1

Fireman’s daughter here. This would be my concern.

It happens. A junior in our town died over the winter break in a fire when the parents were out of town. Her friend, who was spending the night, was seriously injured. So, so sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t do it until my child was well into adulthood.

I was left alone at 15/16 overnight. I was very mature and very independent and always had been for my age, no parties planned or anything like that.

We lived in a super safe suburban neighborhood with no crime in a large single family home. Honestly I was scared out of my mind being alone in the house overnight by myself. Every single little noise that never would have bothered me freaked me out. I was surprised myself at how scared I was considering I stayed alone many times later at night. Overnight it was just a different ballgame. I was too embarrassed to admit how freaked out and scared I was to stay alone overnight to anyone bc my mom was always bragging about how mature and independent I was and
didn’t want anyone to think less of me. And I was mature and independent for a teen but I was still a teen and not an adult.

"Well into adulthood?" By that time, won't they already be living on their own?

Yes, and then the liability is all on them; before 18 anything that goes wrong is on you.

[Anonymous]

Can't you see if your friend can snag an invitation to stay at a friend's that night?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A few months before his 18th birthday. Honestly, I wouldn't even consider it at age 14.

OP, I have a DS exactly your son's age (15 in June) and there is no way I'd do this now. He might talk a good game about how he could handle it, but I would be worried the whole time we were away, even if close by.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We left a 14 year old alone overnight. It just worked out that way. I had a flight out that day, and my husband wasn’t returning until the next day. It was a school night, and he’s in a rigorous program. What is he going to do? Our biggest concern was him oversleeping. If he weren’t comfortable, we wouldn’t have done it. But he preferred it to the awkwardness of staying overnight with others.

Frankly, I would better coordinate my travel schedule with my DH's. As I've done on many occasions.