Why do smart successful parents get sucked into all these scam sports leagues?

[Anonymous]

I have enrolled my kids in whatever activities they want to do and they want to do a lot! I want them to experience different things and hope that in doing that, they enjoy and learn something. They do not have to excel in these activities, just experience and explore them.

I actually don't mind all the driving with the kids and carpools etc. It is not at all stressful for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids don't play travel sports nor are they in any of the competitive, try out orchestras, but I have no issues with kids who pursue those passions! My kids fall in the camp of wanting to play their preferred sports more than rec sports permits, but with much less intensity and skill than the travel level. So what works for them is MSI's classic level soccer and BCC's select level baseball. They also enjoy playing their respective instruments, but are satisfied with their school band. The only part of the high level competitive sports/music/whatever that I don't "get" is the part where the parents/rest of family wrap themselves into planning entire weekends around regular out of town competitions, especially when most likely there are just as good teams to be playing in NoVa if you are in MoCo, or Baltimore, etc - instead of driving the NJ for the weekend . Seems to me that if the kids want that level of involvement/commitment then that is great, but I don't want my whole family's weekend memories to be on the sidelines of child #1's soccer games.

My brothers played a travel sport back in the 1980s-1990s. It had the travel commitments I see now from travel sports. As a family we are close and I partially credit evenings spent playing games in hotel rooms after tournaments, traveling, cheering each other on. Yes, there was some boredom especially when I was a teenager, but there was also just a lot of time together that I appreciate as an adult. I also did a time-consuming activity (music), and my brothers were expected to support me as well, which they did. It's not all bad, in other words, even if you're not the one playing. My parents, now in their late 70s, have very fond memories of those trips and speak about them often. It wasn't perfect but it wasn't terrible, either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

Almost no one on any travel team DS plays on is by any reasonable definition "middle class" --- except us. DS gets to spend a lot of time with kids of parents whose job descriptions are --- at least in part --- "philanthropist" and "board member of the family foundation." Its kind of funny, but doesn't impact the kids or the team. I just mention it because these low key people who are all universally self effacing and charming are about the furthest thing from "social climbers" I can imagine. Does that idea even still exist?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative? Not on our travel team. We switched to travel because in the rec league, everyone makes the team and plays, which is fine, but unless you have a coach who stacks the team (which I don't agree with), you can be subject to wildly varying abilities. Also kids who don't show up for half the games. Or who are only there because their parents forced them to play. Watching your dedicated kid lose game after game because you didn't have enough players or some kid couldn't be bothered to field balls coming at him is frustrating.

Travel teams have tryouts so not everyone makes it and they are expensive enough that parents and kids are invested in showing up.

This is one reason we do it. The other reason, the main reason, sports bring our kids joy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im glad they do travel. My kids play rec and thr few kids that olay both rec and travel really dominate the game and that means less play time for my kids. For instance, last night, we lost our basketball game 52-26. There was ONE kid on the opposing team who scored 30 of those points. He is also on a travel team. He really shouldn't be playing rec for the sake of the kids with normal athletic skill.

Honestly, your scenario sounds like there is a coaching problem too. The "dominate" player would benefit from playing other positions or working on passing, maybe not just shooting.

He passes a ton. Hes a really fair player. Its always that way when travel kids play rec. They absolutely dominate the games. Its a no brainer, rhey are mich higher skilled than the kids who just play rec. Simple as that and i dont think they should be playing rec. Period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

You know this from personal experience? Or from your own envy? I know majority of parents in my kids activities are beyond normal rich.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

OP, are you jealous your kids are not athletic so you had them do music? Music is fine, your judgy mentality is not. Nobody is making you look at your social media. You don't have to have Face Book. Why do you have it? So you can post your kids music performance. You sounds like envious shrew. Why do you force your kids to participate in music? Why are you so lazy that you can't bother to "cart" your kids around? Why are you jealous of other kids winning something and yours winning nothing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will also add that I met the Cheer Leading mom. She had her kids in All Star cheer and then in high schools cheer. She is in competition with all the other moms to know more, do more, have more dinners and events, take over the coaches job even... I don't understand her at all. My kid is also a cheerleader and I don't like going to those football games and freezing. I even posted here about it. I think she is a SAHM, and even if I was I still wouldn't want to have 20 teen girls at my house for a sleepover. Her DD is a nice kid though, so in the end I thank her mom for doing what kids like and many of us don't want to do.

Isn't cheer and dance for proletariat ... where ballet/theater/classical instrument is bourgeoisie?

Proud to be proletariat. Go buy a new electric tooth brush.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

LOL! My husband is a travel sports coach and is now a retired pro baseball player. His club is very competitive. Any many kids are on on "scholarship " because they have the talent, just not the money. I'd say a good 75% of his team upon HS graduation gets either a partial scolarship or gets addmitance to a school they otherwise wouldn't get in. My oldest child plays ball at a D1 school and got a 75% ride which we declined, as we didnt want to take money from those than need it. Sports can offer amazing opportunities in life and even if doors are not open, it builds great life skills.

Continue to drink your haterade, sorry you were picked last for dodgeball and havent recovered, but I've lived and breathed sports for the last 24 years of my life and have seen so many doors open and so many kids grow into great well rounded adults with good leadership and teamwork life skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

LOL! My husband is a travel sports coach and is now a retired pro baseball player. His club is very competitive. Any many kids are on on "scholarship " because they have the talent, just not the money. I'd say a good 75% of his team upon HS graduation gets either a partial scolarship or gets addmitance to a school they otherwise wouldn't get in. My oldest child plays ball at a D1 school and got a 75% ride which we declined, as we didnt want to take money from those than need it. Sports can offer amazing opportunities in life and even if doors are not open, it builds great life skills.

Continue to drink your haterade, sorry you were picked last for dodgeball and havent recovered, but I've lived and breathed sports for the last 24 years of my life and have seen so many doors open and so many kids grow into great well rounded adults with good leadership and teamwork life skills.

This. And we parents have so much fun going along for the ride. There's nothing like whatching your kid perform. They grow up so fast and with sport, it is fun, exciting and the whole can partake, even if you're just a spectator.

[Anonymous]

I have kids in travel sports, but we're 'traveling' within the DMV exurbs, not New Jersey.

If they weren't doing sports, what would fill the time? Video games is the most likely answer. Ours play with the neighborhood kids on off days, but even still, they all end up in front of the xBox for hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Perhaps they want something you don't?

We're not sporty but musical, and I took pains to choose a teaching method that would suit us as well as a great teacher. It's VERY expensive, but the difference in quality of teaching is incredible. However, non-musical parents probably wouldn't care.

So the rec tier is perhaps just for the families who want to occupy their children and have fun doing an activity they like. The upper tier is for families who care about becoming as proficient as possible in that particular sport (or in our case, music).

I'm the OP. Music is different. Theater is different. The arts, in general, are different.

In what way? Community theatre as an adult hobby versus playing on an adult recreational soccer team. Yeah, the former you can do even with a bit of arthritis, but not if God gave you my level of musical talent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Carting your kids around three to five days a week for practice, travel on weekends. 90% of the kids are mediocre and unappreciative, mostly using it as a social activity.

Why do so many get sucked into this lifestyle? I'm close to deleting facebook because I'm so tired of everyone "winning" some obscure swim-lax-soccer-volleyball-etc. "tournament" every weekend.

Because we have the money and you don't?

The travel sports obsession is overwhelmingly desperate middle class social climbers.

I don't even participate and I can still tell this statement is a crock of crap. It says so much much more about the author than those of whom she speaks. People don't do sports for social climbing any more than we do music for social climbing. Climbing to where? Huh? You are with the same crowd as always, it's not like the crowd changes and becomes hoi paloi. They were affluent to begin with, not wannabees.