86k in North Carolina or 100k job in Dulles, VA

[Anonymous]

I think both would be tough to live on, but i aldo think Dulles has more income potential for mobility since there are so many jobs along the corridor. I assume he is in IT. 100k is pratically entey level. I say this as someone who works in IT in Reston.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

Lake life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think both would be tough to live on, but i aldo think Dulles has more income potential for mobility since there are so many jobs along the corridor. I assume he is in IT. 100k is pratically entey level. I say this as someone who works in IT in Reston.

What would be mid career IT, non supervisory? I though supply and H1B made it today out at 130k?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I am poster 12:48 wo has lived both in RTP in NC and in the DC area currently. Some questions...

Do you already live in DC or have you spent a large amount of time in the DC area? Have you tried to take the metro from around the are you would be living into DC or drive into DC?

Have you read this current thread on DCUM? It may prove to be informative: http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/587750.page

My experience has been that the DC area offers (1) jobs (2) cultural opportunities. The downsides are (1) traffic / transportation (2) sucky mean people, who are probably mean and sucky because we are competing for limited resources for people who make under 150k or so a year.

My experience was the the Raleigh / Durham area of NC offered: (1) easy driving conditions, compared to DC (2) lower cost of living for higher quality lifestyle and greater ability to attend cultural events. The downsides were (1) super competitive job market (2) current political situation. There are lots of refugees from the DC area there.

Here, in the DC area, we use most of our money to pay mortgage and occasionaly brave the using the Metro to go to cultural events and museums. My friends who have kids never go to DC, and when they do they drive--it's cheaper than paying for their family to take the Metro.

OP people on this board go ape over Raleigh/Durham as this great exit, and it's nice enough. But you said abc, near Greensboro which is way more southern and typical of NC. It sounds like DH is getting a non-tenure staff stats job at a small liberal arts college in the sticks of NC? That seems pretty dead end and if anything happens and his job is cut you will have to move. If it's tenure track it might worth sticking it out, but for small no where college lateral options even with moving may be small

PP is right, DC has lots and lots of jobs. That's about its main draw. I know some stats folks in fed govt and they have nice $130k paycheck so some growth there. Also I think you will find many more piano clients in DC region -- I know in my small southern town no one took piano!

Tough choice. Which job does DH like best?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

Lake life?

I am curious about this as there are no natural lakes in VA or MD!

And what kids likes wineries or breweries ? As a non drinker they are quite boring. But if your kids are full participants well that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I am poster 12:48 wo has lived both in RTP in NC and in the DC area currently. Some questions...

Do you already live in DC or have you spent a large amount of time in the DC area? Have you tried to take the metro from around the are you would be living into DC or drive into DC?

Have you read this current thread on DCUM? It may prove to be informative: http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/587750.page

My experience has been that the DC area offers (1) jobs (2) cultural opportunities. The downsides are (1) traffic / transportation (2) sucky mean people, who are probably mean and sucky because we are competing for limited resources for people who make under 150k or so a year.

My experience was the the Raleigh / Durham area of NC offered: (1) easy driving conditions, compared to DC (2) lower cost of living for higher quality lifestyle and greater ability to attend cultural events. The downsides were (1) super competitive job market (2) current political situation. There are lots of refugees from the DC area there.

Here, in the DC area, we use most of our money to pay mortgage and occasionaly brave the using the Metro to go to cultural events and museums. My friends who have kids never go to DC, and when they do they drive--it's cheaper than paying for their family to take the Metro.

OP people on this board go ape over Raleigh/Durham as this great exit, and it's nice enough. But you said abc, near Greensboro which is way more southern and typical of NC. It sounds like DH is getting a non-tenure staff stats job at a small liberal arts college in the sticks of NC? That seems pretty dead end and if anything happens and his job is cut you will have to move. If it's tenure track it might worth sticking it out, but for small no where college lateral options even with moving may be small

PP is right, DC has lots and lots of jobs. That's about its main draw. I know some stats folks in fed govt and they have nice $130k paycheck so some growth there. Also I think you will find many more piano clients in DC region -- I know in my small southern town no one took piano!

Tough choice. Which job does DH like best?

It's a tt position. Dh prefers a university that goes to PhD level.

[Anonymous]

If you're making 35K there by teaching music, you'll probably make close to if not double that here. Prices are significantly higher here for things like music lessons.

So let's say your total HHI could possibly go up to 160K. That's pretty good for living in Ashburn/Dulles area. And if the job your dh is getting has room for advancement he'll only make more in the years to come.

I'd pick Dulles hands down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP, I am poster 12:48 wo has lived both in RTP in NC and in the DC area currently. Some questions...

Do you already live in DC or have you spent a large amount of time in the DC area? Have you tried to take the metro from around the are you would be living into DC or drive into DC?

Have you read this current thread on DCUM? It may prove to be informative: http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/587750.page

My experience has been that the DC area offers (1) jobs (2) cultural opportunities. The downsides are (1) traffic / transportation (2) sucky mean people, who are probably mean and sucky because we are competing for limited resources for people who make under 150k or so a year.

My experience was the the Raleigh / Durham area of NC offered: (1) easy driving conditions, compared to DC (2) lower cost of living for higher quality lifestyle and greater ability to attend cultural events. The downsides were (1) super competitive job market (2) current political situation. There are lots of refugees from the DC area there.

Here, in the DC area, we use most of our money to pay mortgage and occasionaly brave the using the Metro to go to cultural events and museums. My friends who have kids never go to DC, and when they do they drive--it's cheaper than paying for their family to take the Metro.

The link says the topic doesn't exist. Was that the thread by the Midwesterner who needed to dramatically recalibrate her expectations? And wondered why late 20s/early30s couple would ever want to spend time in the city? If so, sad it's gone. That was some quality entertainment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

Lake life?

I am curious about this as there are no natural lakes in VA or MD!

And what kids likes wineries or breweries ? As a non drinker they are quite boring. But if your kids are full participants well that makes sense.

Dc resident here. My kids love going. We go to a windery every mothers day and I'd say its my kids very favorite event each year. They have corn hole, horseshoes, badminton, and we bring a football and Frisbee. We also pack a great picnic. My son even asked to have his bday party there, but of course that is not realistic.

What kid doesn't love to go somewhere with their family and play games outside? Its like a park where the parents want to stay and hang out for a long time.

I'd definitely say if logistics worked for us and we were closer to wineries, that would be much better than what we do now on the weekends. We only live here because we have to. DH got his position with the current administration and we'll be packing it up in January. Thank God.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We moved here for DH's job. His increase was both a jump in hierarchy and pay (about a 40% increase). His goal is to climb, so it made sense in that regard too. How about your DH's job change? Does it come with possibilities for advancement too?

Added benefit for us is that while I don't work now (young kids at home), it will hopefully be relatively easy for me to find something in the DC area if I decide to start working again, vs elsewhere.

Yes definitely. Dh is a statistician. The job in nc has little advancement as the university doesn't have a ms or PhD program. It's a small liberal arts university.

Then I think, if his goals are to advance and the DC job offers him that opportunity and the NC one does not, then that is a big non-monetary reason to move here and take the hit in finances and COL as a sacrifice for the long run. It will definitely be tight though. Mostly because of housing + childcare.

For 15K per year less, I would gladly take a TT position. First, it is a 9 month salary. He can get something for 3 months during the summer.

Second, if he gets tenure, he is set. Since it is not a research school, tenure is based on his teaching ability. I assume this is elon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

Lake life?

I am curious about this as there are no natural lakes in VA or MD!

And what kids likes wineries or breweries ? As a non drinker they are quite boring. But if your kids are full participants well that makes sense.

Dc resident here. My kids love going. We go to a windery every mothers day and I'd say its my kids very favorite event each year. They have corn hole, horseshoes, badminton, and we bring a football and Frisbee. We also pack a great picnic. My son even asked to have his bday party there, but of course that is not realistic.

What kid doesn't love to go somewhere with their family and play games outside? Its like a park where the parents want to stay and hang out for a long time.

I'd definitely say if logistics worked for us and we were closer to wineries, that would be much better than what we do now on the weekends. We only live here because we have to. DH got his position with the current administration and we'll be packing it up in January. Thank God.

Weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We moved here for DH's job. His increase was both a jump in hierarchy and pay (about a 40% increase). His goal is to climb, so it made sense in that regard too. How about your DH's job change? Does it come with possibilities for advancement too?

Added benefit for us is that while I don't work now (young kids at home), it will hopefully be relatively easy for me to find something in the DC area if I decide to start working again, vs elsewhere.

Yes definitely. Dh is a statistician. The job in nc has little advancement as the university doesn't have a ms or PhD program. It's a small liberal arts university.

Then I think, if his goals are to advance and the DC job offers him that opportunity and the NC one does not, then that is a big non-monetary reason to move here and take the hit in finances and COL as a sacrifice for the long run. It will definitely be tight though. Mostly because of housing + childcare.

For 15K per year less, I would gladly take a TT position. First, it is a 9 month salary. He can get something for 3 months during the summer.

Second, if he gets tenure, he is set. Since it is not a research school, tenure is based on his teaching ability. I assume this is elon.

Op here: dh is leaning towards not acceptable the position in NC. He really wants a position at a research university.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We moved here for DH's job. His increase was both a jump in hierarchy and pay (about a 40% increase). His goal is to climb, so it made sense in that regard too. How about your DH's job change? Does it come with possibilities for advancement too?

Added benefit for us is that while I don't work now (young kids at home), it will hopefully be relatively easy for me to find something in the DC area if I decide to start working again, vs elsewhere.

Yes definitely. Dh is a statistician. The job in nc has little advancement as the university doesn't have a ms or PhD program. It's a small liberal arts university.

Then I think, if his goals are to advance and the DC job offers him that opportunity and the NC one does not, then that is a big non-monetary reason to move here and take the hit in finances and COL as a sacrifice for the long run. It will definitely be tight though. Mostly because of housing + childcare.

For 15K per year less, I would gladly take a TT position. First, it is a 9 month salary. He can get something for 3 months during the summer.

Second, if he gets tenure, he is set. Since it is not a research school, tenure is based on his teaching ability. I assume this is elon.

Op here: dh is leaning towards not acceptable the position in NC. He really wants a position at a research university.

Not gonna happen in DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would choose Dulles or Sterling over Nortth Carolina any day. Your access to DC will not be as limited as some other posters suggest.

+1 some DC residents are so entitled.

Realistically while your kids are young, in a two full time working parent household, you will go to DC once a month, if that. With up to 1 hr or 1 hr plus commutes, just doing a 40-50 hr job sucks up so much time. But later, if you as a music teacher have a short commute, plus maybe don't need to do 40 hrs every soul sucking week, then you might enjoy what DC has to offer more. With 2 young kids and a 45 hr job with 45-70 min commute each way, my life is so confined to work home errands repeat that I have real resentment towards the mortgage and the 9,000/year in real estate property taxes we pay. I live near DC but do not benefit from what DC offers. We save very little due to COL. I was thinking we could be living in Podunk and our daily lives would be the same. Except Tysons mall. At least I have that nearby (sigh).

I dont go near DC. I live in the burbs and make it in MAYBE once a month and its adults only, uber, trashed, uber home.

We spend just about every weekend May-Thanksgiving in the Blue Ridge Mountains. My kids much prefer lake life, hiking, tennis, golf, PYO, and family friendly wineries/breweries to being dragged along with the smelly masses through museums they've been to a bazillion times with out of town guests and on field trips. Snooze.

Lake life?

I am curious about this as there are no natural lakes in VA or MD!

And what kids likes wineries or breweries ? As a non drinker they are quite boring. But if your kids are full participants well that makes sense.

Dc resident here. My kids love going. We go to a windery every mothers day and I'd say its my kids very favorite event each year. They have corn hole, horseshoes, badminton, and we bring a football and Frisbee. We also pack a great picnic. My son even asked to have his bday party there, but of course that is not realistic.

What kid doesn't love to go somewhere with their family and play games outside? Its like a park where the parents want to stay and hang out for a long time.

I'd definitely say if logistics worked for us and we were closer to wineries, that would be much better than what we do now on the weekends. We only live here because we have to. DH got his position with the current administration and we'll be packing it up in January. Thank God.

Weird.

Not weird. My kids love this too. Many of the wineries are family friendly. My kids love going to Dukiene. They have a pond they allow the kids to fish in and catch and release. We go therr about 3xs a year. Full of families. I guess weird families that like to have fun outdoors.