Poor People - Why did you choose private?

[Anonymous]

"Poor" mom of 2 high schoolers - With a small child support payment from their biological dad - This year, I am borrowing fully from my retirement, and we are pretty much consumed with regular Ramen & Spaghetti dinners in order to pay tuition at private school for my two children. I own my home by myself & the public school option in Prince George's County is THAT disturbing - I know it well, my stepson went there for 2 years (my husband of 3 yrs and his son moved out last month for the purpose of sending his son to a different public school - his mom doesn't pay support and this will be the arrangement until the end of next school year because he'll be a senior). My financial aid award was a total of $10k and $16k is my responsibility. Already thinking of how to pay the year after - may sell house but need to build equity first or it won't cover it.

[Anonymous]

PP, are you depending on your kids to support you in retirement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Poor" mom of 2 high schoolers - With a small child support payment from their biological dad - This year, I am borrowing fully from my retirement, and we are pretty much consumed with regular Ramen & Spaghetti dinners in order to pay tuition at private school for my two children. I own my home by myself & the public school option in Prince George's County is THAT disturbing - I know it well, my stepson went there for 2 years (my husband of 3 yrs and his son moved out last month for the purpose of sending his son to a different public school - his mom doesn't pay support and this will be the arrangement until the end of next school year because he'll be a senior). My financial aid award was a total of $10k and $16k is my responsibility. Already thinking of how to pay the year after - may sell house but need to build equity first or it won't cover it.

Not gonna tell you how you should live your life but that's just about the dumbest thing i've heard..

[Anonymous]

**it's a loan against my retirement that I pay back (so I'm not draining it, I'm just getting double taxed on it). I figure 4 yrs of High School = 4 extra yrs to work off the double tax is worth the alternative...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:**it's a loan against my retirement that I pay back (so I'm not draining it, I'm just getting double taxed on it). I figure 4 yrs of High School = 4 extra yrs to work off the double tax is worth the alternative...

I completely understand doing everything in your power to keep your kids out of a bad school. Is moving and renting in an area zoned to a better school an option?

[Anonymous]

So, I can't speak from personal experience, but my husband STILL has a chip on his shoulder from being the poor kid in his private high school. The financial Aid package promised to his parents changed significantly and forced them to change schools multiple times k-12. The poor people are essentially pawns of the administration. You and your kid's future there hang on their whims. Its
Sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Poor as in will have to borrow money and eat beans for dinner.

My son was in public and is now in a top private. We love the private school but would never do it if the sacrifice were that huge. Not worth it. Move, enter the lottery or do what you have to do to find a good public instead. I do think learning disabilities make things different though so talking about a typical student here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Poor as in will have to borrow money and eat beans for dinner.

If you are that poor you would qualify for a full ride.
Why would you not take it if offered?

What private schools in the area offer full rides?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, I can't speak from personal experience, but my husband STILL has a chip on his shoulder from being the poor kid in his private high school. The financial Aid package promised to his parents changed significantly and forced them to change schools multiple times k-12. The poor people are essentially pawns of the administration. You and your kid's future there hang on their whims. Its
Sad.

*it's sad... Before someone flames me for being a poorly educated public school slob.

[Anonymous]

Because, indeed, the early years are the most important ones....

[Anonymous]

Troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Poor" mom of 2 high schoolers - With a small child support payment from their biological dad - This year, I am borrowing fully from my retirement, and we are pretty much consumed with regular Ramen & Spaghetti dinners in order to pay tuition at private school for my two children. I own my home by myself & the public school option in Prince George's County is THAT disturbing - I know it well, my stepson went there for 2 years (my husband of 3 yrs and his son moved out last month for the purpose of sending his son to a different public school - his mom doesn't pay support and this will be the arrangement until the end of next school year because he'll be a senior). My financial aid award was a total of $10k and $16k is my responsibility. Already thinking of how to pay the year after - may sell house but need to build equity first or it won't cover it.

Not gonna tell you how you should live your life but that's just about the dumbest thing i've heard..

We're doing this too. Don't see what's so dumb about it. Kid couldn't go to private if we didn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were very poor when I was growing up. Couldn't buy food poor. My parents sent me to private starting in sixth grade. Carried a lot of guilt for a long time over sacrifices they made. Way beyond not buying nice things. Not buying any things full stop. Some financial aid but we also paid. Why do it? I went to college. A "real" one not a community college for a year. I was the first. I went to graduate school. I ended up having a professional and a career. My kids feel safe and are happy. They know a little bit about music and art and travel. They know nothing about the anxiety of the price rising on Mac and cheese. Five for a dollar when I was young. I try to teach them to be good citizens of the world. I try to put them in a position to give back. I think my parents did private for me because it opened doors public couldn't. Because it can really catapult kids. It can literally be a walk through the looking glass experience in terms of life experience and opportunity. That isn't the be all and end all. But it gave them home. Like putting me on a raft in a turbulent ocean. Still carry the burden though of the sacrifice it required.

Plenty of poor public school kids end up entering the middle class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Poor" mom of 2 high schoolers - With a small child support payment from their biological dad - This year, I am borrowing fully from my retirement, and we are pretty much consumed with regular Ramen & Spaghetti dinners in order to pay tuition at private school for my two children. I own my home by myself & the public school option in Prince George's County is THAT disturbing - I know it well, my stepson went there for 2 years (my husband of 3 yrs and his son moved out last month for the purpose of sending his son to a different public school - his mom doesn't pay support and this will be the arrangement until the end of next school year because he'll be a senior). My financial aid award was a total of $10k and $16k is my responsibility. Already thinking of how to pay the year after - may sell house but need to build equity first or it won't cover it.

Not gonna tell you how you should live your life but that's just about the dumbest thing i've heard..

We're doing this too. Don't see what's so dumb about it. Kid couldn't go to private if we didn't.

it's dumb because you are sacrificing your retirement. how will you fund your retirement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where in the world did you get that idea about private schools? Where are you from? Are you Jewish by chance? The only people I know with that idea are from the sticks. Every place where I have lived (very urban and big city) ... the top 5% of the economic class goes to private and everyone else is SOL!

Anonymous wrote:in most parts of the country, private school IS for kids who can't hack it in public (for whatever reason.) but in the DC/NYC/Boston corridor the answer is more complex - bring in social status, family expectations, and buying into a certain group. A kind of branding, so you can easily identify people who share your financial and philosophical positions.

Not the PP, but I agree. When you get out of the big cities (no not synonymous with the sticks), private school kids are generally those that had some kind of "issue" in public schools. The top 5% of the economic class are usually concentrated in the same areas, and those kids attend the local public schools.