6 y old drop off party. How do I word this?

[Anonymous]

One of my kids was happy being dropped off at parties by age 3. The other would cling until age 7.

We just had a party recently for the 9yo. 10 guests ... every single parent stayed, in at least 4 cases that I can recall both parents stayed. Reasons ranged from "really cool place, I'd love to see the activities!" (science center type place) to "he's really shy" to "deathly allergies and I like be nearby with the epi-pen just in case". Or maybe they just don't trust DH and me ... who knows? He did start a new school this year, so about half the kids were from families we'd not met before. I will say that I actually enjoyed getting to chat with the new parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here. I was thinking of a similar party. We have about 7000 piece of loose bricks lego, and various other sets. Do you think this is enough to entertain 9 kids? I wonder whether I can get away with just this one activity. With cake and pizza of course. I also have other building toys such as blocks, tinker toys, magformer etc. Kids are 6 to 7.

I wouldn't expect that to entertain them for more than 30 minutes, and I wouldn't expect cake and pizza to last more than 15-20. If you are hosting a 2 hour party, then you need to come up with a few other activities. Then the day of, you can be flexible and scratch the other activities if the kids are playing well with the legos.
The problem isn't that the kids won't want to play. It's that if you leave 9 six year olds to play legos together for an hour, at some point two of them are going to start fighting, and you really don't want to be in the position of punishing someone else's kid on the day of your child's birthday party.

[Anonymous]

At our 5 year old's summer playdate-style birthday party almost every parent stayed. However that was probably because of the large pitchers of sangria we prepared them.

[Anonymous]

OP - I think "six" is a crossover age in terms of how independent a child might function in an unknown home and/or larger setting. Also remember you are blending children from different settings so you may have some who do not necessarily mix as readily as your DS and those kids you know well who are coming. In your case, I would expect you would not need to worry that much about parents staying since four are neighbor's kids and your son knows the kids from elsewhere. I t might be the four from school that you have to be flexible with if you do not know the parent and the child. Those who noted flexibility is a good rule to have because a crying youngster just dropped off will spoil a party; whereas maybe a parent would just stay a few minutes. In any case, DO NOT feel that you have to entertain nor feed the parent who might stay. I do think you probably need to have another adult besides you and your DH to help supervise. If a parent stays then put them to work as noted helping.

On twins birthdays some ideas we have seen are outdoor or indoor ice skating with a couple of penguins reserved AND in that case a parent counted on to stay if a non-skater. Also, an arts center was rented once with a craft etc. provided, and bowling has also been done. It is hard in the winter time. The key is to have some open time and some structured activities as noted. The Legos theme for a young boy sounds great The movie might actually be offered at the end as the party and the kids start to wind down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At our 5 year old's summer playdate-style birthday party almost every parent stayed. However that was probably because of the large pitchers of sangria we prepared them.

We just had our 6 year old party at non-traditional place and more dad's than mom's came. We also made it clear we were feeding everyone and went out of our way to make the parents just as comfortable as the kids. If I know it is not a parent friendly venue and only minimal effort is being made, if they are not good friends with my child, we decline. We had multiple kids (entire class party plus outside friends) who knew my child but may not have been friends who came. All the parents seemed to enjoy it. It was a nice get-together so everyone would become more friendly and it seemed to work. It only cost us a little more to provide food for everyone (we could have done it cheaper but we had a huge spread to make sure even picky eaters would have something to snack on). If I came to a party where you made it clear parents were not wanted and only fed/entertained the kids minimally and barely supervised, we would not be accepting any more invitations from your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you think most people will drop off? I really would prefer not to have to entertain the parents. I'm aiming for a very low key party.

I'm the opposite. I don't know you at all, why would I feel comfortable leaving my kid with you? I'm most comfortable coming in for a bit and then leaving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would say drop off and parents welcome. I would not be dropping off my child if I did not know you well. I would not say anything and just decline if I saw it was a drop-off party.

You sound insane.

You don't leave your kids with strangers.

Strangers do not invite the kids of strangers to their child's birthday party.

[Anonymous]

Sure they do. We just went to one the other day. The parents just moved here the other day and I knew nothing about them. I usually don't stay but I did this time.

[Anonymous]

I have a six year and drop off but only do so if hosting parent is okay with me dropping off kid with his own cupcake and epi as he does have food allergy. 99% of parents are okay with this but every now and again I stay. Of course I write that parent off because there is a greater chance of someone choking then my kid having a reaction with their own food so will assume host parent is a basket case.

[Anonymous]

Say drop off is welcome but be fine if some parents stay.
You probably don't need planned activities, but have a few in mind/on hand in case needed. Examples: crafts, a piñata, twister, etc. Also have toys lots of kids can play with on hand (if outside, balls, chalk, bubbles, etc. if inside, building toys, games, etc).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you think most people will drop off? I really would prefer not to have to entertain the parents. I'm aiming for a very low key party.

By 6, dropoff is default and expected.

NP - I found out the hard way that indeed, a lot of parents think it is default at 6, and I'd invited a lot of kids! But OP be clear: some parents (many that I know, myself included) do NOT drop off at a home we've never been to, or with parents we've never met. Maybe after being there 30 min or an hour I'd leave for the last hour, but if I don't know you or haven't been to your house, no, not dropping off. Not until my kids are a bit older.

We're planning party for oldest now (he's turning 7), and while we're not going to demand that parents stay (can't really demand that, can you), we're being a lot more selective about how many and which kids we invite because we want some of the parents to stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would say drop off and parents welcome. I would not be dropping off my child if I did not know you well. I would not say anything and just decline if I saw it was a drop-off party.

You sound insane.

You don't leave your kids with strangers.

I wouldn't either. Not at all.

You sound insane, too. Jesus. The helicopter blades are deafening.

Always good when our resident creepy "Only insane parents stay when they've never been in the home or met the parents!" poster shows up. Keep trying, but know that you cannot shame sane and smart parents out of having a protective rule that they don't drop kids off at homes we're unfamiliar with.

Speaking of insane, only an insane parent lets some silly creepy troll on an anonymous message board "embarrass" them out of what they know is best for their kid.

[Anonymous]

Here's the trick to a drop-off party. Have a low-key craft activity set up at the dining room table (or similar) for when the kids get there. It shouldn't need lots of supervision, because you will be meeting and greeting the kids. Make sure it takes about 20 minutes. For your party, it could be one of the Lego activities the website suggests. Then do some sort of active activity (dance party game of freeze where they have to stop when you turn off the music. winner takes the prize). Then have them sit down (with popcorn) for the movie. You can go to a party supply store and get the old fashioned popcorn small tubs. Watch the movie. Eat cake. Free play. Seriously, don't over think this. You can do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a six year and drop off but only do so if hosting parent is okay with me dropping off kid with his own cupcake and epi as he does have food allergy. 99% of parents are okay with this but every now and again I stay. Of course I write that parent off because there is a greater chance of someone choking then my kid having a reaction with their own food so will assume host parent is a basket case.

You sound pretty selfish. You don't just drop off a kid with an epi pen and hope a parent is ok with it. You need to explain to them how it is used and go over what is ok for your child. There are videos online. If a parent is not willing or want to be trained in it, why on earth would you risk your child safety if the allergy is serious enough to have a pen. When we host a party we always ask each parent for any food allergies or picky eating to make sure the child will be safe/have something to eat. To write off a parent because they are not comfortable with food allergies is strange.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would say drop off and parents welcome. I would not be dropping off my child if I did not know you well. I would not say anything and just decline if I saw it was a drop-off party.

You sound insane.

You don't leave your kids with strangers.

Strangers do not invite the kids of strangers to their child's birthday party.

Do you really know all the parents of the kids in your child's class? Do you know all the kids (we do as its a small school but in all reality no)? Have you been to each child's house to know it is child friendly and comfortable for your child. We invited a lot of people we did not know. Our child had a September birthday and we always invite everyone. Lots of parents came who we did not know which was nice so we did get to meet them.