Oh, why, why, why did I choose Catholic school for my kids?

[Anonymous]

I am so happy to be leaving our parish school. It is the (bad) public that you pay for! Independent Catholic schools are an entirely different story, and many of those are quite good, but parish schools run on a shoestring budget and have large classes, and limited resources. No thank you.
Signed,
A weekly Mass goer

[Anonymous]

Are these awful catholic schools in the area? If so, name them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my experience, sending kids to Catholic school is a good way of turning them against the church for life

+2

[Anonymous]

OP, my DC went to a Christian school (not Catholic) and we found experiences to be very similar to yours. Lots of piety and rigidity - no thanks. Public school for us next year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just read the thread about being over homework and thought, "Yep. This is why mine go to Catholic school." No hw in K. No more than 10 mins per grade until MS. Even in MS, HW gets done before pick up from after care. All questions about HW go to the teacher(s). Studying for tests and special projects are all very manageable.

Yes the behavioral standards are higher. Thankfully.

My daughter had 20 math problems that she could finish in 20 minutes in Catholic.

flash forward to now - She may have one math problem that can take anywhere from 10 - 20 minutes to complete b/c it's that complex. We know her reading level. She's exceeded her grade level, which wasn't brought to our attention in private school.

Many Catholic school teachers aren't experienced in pedagogy. So they prefer drills to critical thinking.

We're having the exact opposite experience with math and reading. I asked the zoned public ES principal how they would accommodate my DD who was performing way above grade level in math and reading. I got vague answers about applying to a HGC when she reached the appropriate grade. In her Catholic school, she was sent to a higher grade level for those two classes and rejoins her grade for the other subjects.

Do you mind saying which Catholic school? This sounds good.

[Anonymous]

To OP - I'm sorry the school year wasn't a smooth one for your DC.

I wish more teacher's realized that "going to the bathroom" a lot during the day, is a sign of anxiety.

I didn't know at the time but my very shy and quiet older daughter was going to the bathroom at school up to 6 times a day for most of the school year. She would spend a good 20-30 minutes in the bathroom at home several times a day, too. I thought it was because she was trying to get some peace and quite from her younger sister, but it was actually stress and anxiety from school. Once the school year was over and the stress of that environment was gone, she immediately went back to using the bathroom 3-4 times a day. Now as a middle schooler, when she's in the bathroom often, I know she's stressed and I give her some more TLC and encourage her to talk about stuff.

When younger DD started using the bathroom often at school (first grade), the teacher alerted me. I knew it was stress as this teacher was a tough-ass. The teacher, at my suggestion, did a few things in the class to ease my DDs stress and anxiety.

I hope next fall is better for you and your sons....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the second year my boys go to Catholic school. I was iffy after the first year, but I wanted to keep it stable for my first grader who has made wonderful friends, a new school can be stressful for little ones that have already made friends. But I should have grabbed my boys and ran the moment my first grader crucified my kindergartner to a construction paper cross, complete with blood on the hands, feet and forehead courtesy of red marker. My kindergartner mentioned he was going to hell because the teacher told a friend he was going there if he didn't behave. I kid you not, really, really? I volunteer a bit at the school on my free days (I only work part-time.) One day I was sorting papers for an activity in the Kinder classroom. A kindergartner was particularly bouncy on his seat, he was really struggling to remain seated, which I think is normal in 5 and 6 year old boys. He wasn't making noise, just kept bouncing up of his chair. I personally would have let him work standing up, what's the harm, right? But then I'm not a teacher, so don't lynch me. Well the teacher told him to stay on his chair like 10 times, and she was getting so frustrated, and the little guy obviously struggled to do so for a long period of time. Finally, she called him to the front, and announced that the whole class could thank little boy for not having recess that day. Little boy started to cry and I was so mortified. The assistant teacher acted like it was the most normal thing. I asked my son and he told me they miss recess all the time because that little boy and another boy "suck." I reprimanded him for using the word and explained that not all children that little have an easy time staying in their seat and that it is not their fault. But to him, it was their fault because the teacher made it that way. She pinned the whole class against these children. I just want to cry. I wrote a letter to the principal, her response was the rules of the class apply to all (in a nicely written email.) My first grader keeps coming home and bolting to the bathroom because the teacher does not allow them to use the bathroom more than twice a day, even though I have emailed her about it and so have other parents. Sooo, it is public school for us next year, thank goodness we have a great one in our neighborhood.

That's a shitty teacher but that isn't Catholic school specific.

This is our EXACT experience in Catholic as well. So maybe OP's school and the school I sent my kids to was the same? We lasted one year. DS has ADHD and while in K was made to sit in the naughty red chair in the back of the room because he couldn't keep his hands to himself. The entire class - school wide - routinely misses recess due to chatty kids in the halls - yes that's right you're not allowed to talk in the halls!! And you are not allowed to go to recess until your lunch box has been inspected showing that you've eaten your WHOLE lunch. not exaggerating or lying.....call me a troll go ahead.

[Anonymous]

Since nobody is naming them, I don't believe any of these catholic schools are in the area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody is naming them, I don't believe any of these catholic schools are in the area.

I know. What they are describing just does not reflect our experience in the least. (St. Joseph School, Herndon) We have been very pleased. Shrug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody is naming them, I don't believe any of these catholic schools are in the area.

Great ploy to try to get people to name specific schools. I can tell you that our experience was horrific. School is located in Bethesda. that's the most I'm going to give you.

[Anonymous]

I think the school sounds great. Do they spank? The best ones spank. Spare the rod, spoil the child. I was hit in school and turned out great. Sad when the schools are the ones that know how to handle children better then the parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody is naming them, I don't believe any of these catholic schools are in the area.

Great ploy to try to get people to name specific schools. I can tell you that our experience was horrific. School is located in Bethesda. that's the most I'm going to give you.

Look, I care because I'm considering catholic school in Alexandria. I have never heard of these types of situations in present day in this area. I'm shocked that they still occur. Maybe they only occur in Bethesda? I've visited our potential school and it seems overwhelmingly loving and loved in return. I can't imagine any parent allowing these type of situations to continue, at least in my area, the schools would dwindle in enrollment so quickly. I'm very sorry you had such a poor experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the second year my boys go to Catholic school. I was iffy after the first year, but I wanted to keep it stable for my first grader who has made wonderful friends, a new school can be stressful for little ones that have already made friends. But I should have grabbed my boys and ran the moment my first grader crucified my kindergartner to a construction paper cross, complete with blood on the hands, feet and forehead courtesy of red marker. My kindergartner mentioned he was going to hell because the teacher told a friend he was going there if he didn't behave. I kid you not, really, really? I volunteer a bit at the school on my free days (I only work part-time.) One day I was sorting papers for an activity in the Kinder classroom. A kindergartner was particularly bouncy on his seat, he was really struggling to remain seated, which I think is normal in 5 and 6 year old boys. He wasn't making noise, just kept bouncing up of his chair. I personally would have let him work standing up, what's the harm, right? But then I'm not a teacher, so don't lynch me. Well the teacher told him to stay on his chair like 10 times, and she was getting so frustrated, and the little guy obviously struggled to do so for a long period of time. Finally, she called him to the front, and announced that the whole class could thank little boy for not having recess that day. Little boy started to cry and I was so mortified. The assistant teacher acted like it was the most normal thing. I asked my son and he told me they miss recess all the time because that little boy and another boy "suck." I reprimanded him for using the word and explained that not all children that little have an easy time staying in their seat and that it is not their fault. But to him, it was their fault because the teacher made it that way. She pinned the whole class against these children. I just want to cry. I wrote a letter to the principal, her response was the rules of the class apply to all (in a nicely written email.) My first grader keeps coming home and bolting to the bathroom because the teacher does not allow them to use the bathroom more than twice a day, even though I have emailed her about it and so have other parents. Sooo, it is public school for us next year, thank goodness we have a great one in our neighborhood.

We had a very similar experience. There were a lot of parents complaining about a bully teacher in first grade. What did the school do? They moved her to Kinder, where the kids are even less likely to speak up. It was beyond frustrating so I pulled. My children out and they are incredibly happy in our neighborhood's school.

YESYESYES! Bully teachers!. Unbelievable bully teachers. And shaming. Public shaming. And guilt. A punitive system is no way to run a school. That that D student (in the catholic school's eyes) is going to Yale pulled straight As in every quarter in new school and is going to Princeton.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is the second year my boys go to Catholic school. I was iffy after the first year, but I wanted to keep it stable for my first grader who has made wonderful friends, a new school can be stressful for little ones that have already made friends. But I should have grabbed my boys and ran the moment my first grader crucified my kindergartner to a construction paper cross, complete with blood on the hands, feet and forehead courtesy of red marker. My kindergartner mentioned he was going to hell because the teacher told a friend he was going there if he didn't behave. I kid you not, really, really? I volunteer a bit at the school on my free days (I only work part-time.) One day I was sorting papers for an activity in the Kinder classroom. A kindergartner was particularly bouncy on his seat, he was really struggling to remain seated, which I think is normal in 5 and 6 year old boys. He wasn't making noise, just kept bouncing up of his chair. I personally would have let him work standing up, what's the harm, right? But then I'm not a teacher, so don't lynch me. Well the teacher told him to stay on his chair like 10 times, and she was getting so frustrated, and the little guy obviously struggled to do so for a long period of time. Finally, she called him to the front, and announced that the whole class could thank little boy for not having recess that day. Little boy started to cry and I was so mortified. The assistant teacher acted like it was the most normal thing. I asked my son and he told me they miss recess all the time because that little boy and another boy "suck." I reprimanded him for using the word and explained that not all children that little have an easy time staying in their seat and that it is not their fault. But to him, it was their fault because the teacher made it that way. She pinned the whole class against these children. I just want to cry. I wrote a letter to the principal, her response was the rules of the class apply to all (in a nicely written email.) My first grader keeps coming home and bolting to the bathroom because the teacher does not allow them to use the bathroom more than twice a day, even though I have emailed her about it and so have other parents. Sooo, it is public school for us next year, thank goodness we have a great one in our neighborhood.

OP, I don't know if it's because the school is Catholic or whatever but that is absolutely horrifying.
That is so inappropriate on so many levels.
Good luck next year.
I'd also get in touch with the poor boy's parents. No child should have to live that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since nobody is naming them, I don't believe any of these catholic schools are in the area.

Great ploy to try to get people to name specific schools. I can tell you that our experience was horrific. School is located in Bethesda. that's the most I'm going to give you.

Look, I care because I'm considering catholic school in Alexandria. I have never heard of these types of situations in present day in this area. I'm shocked that they still occur. Maybe they only occur in Bethesda? I've visited our potential school and it seems overwhelmingly loving and loved in return. I can't imagine any parent allowing these type of situations to continue, at least in my area, the schools would dwindle in enrollment so quickly. I'm very sorry you had such a poor experience.

We are at a Catholic school in Alexandria and this is not our experience. Great school that is loving and supportive and the kids can go to the bathroom when they need it.