Are you jealous of your friend who has a "better life?" Nanny, big house, great hubby & fancy car?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sounds like your friend might be less happy than you think. her idea of a vacay is to cross the atlantic ocean and leave her kids behind? sounds biazrre to me (unless her kids are teens I suppose).

YES THIS!!!

Who would want to go with little kids to Europe?? Sounds pretty awesome to me. I would though probably enjoy it much more with teens.

I've abandoned any sort of good travel with kids, too much stress and work.

I enjoyed travel with my kids at all ages
No I didn't take them to Europe until 12 but we did many caribbean vacations, cruises, Disney. etc.

You must have a low stress tolerance.

[Anonymous]

I'm not envious because I see what they have to put up with in terms of expectations from their husbands that they be thin, blond, and/or responsible for perfectly executing every aspect of maintaining the home. That looks like a much riskier strategy than developing marketable job skills.

[Anonymous]

I have all that but I never see my great hubby during the week because he works so hard so we can have big house, nanny, fancy car, country club. I miss the old days when we had less money but more time. He doesn't want to ratchet back though so I have just learned to live with it. It's not all it's cracked up to be.

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have all that but I never see my great hubby during the week because he works so hard so we can have big house, nanny, fancy car, country club. I miss the old days when we had less money but more time. He doesn't want to ratchet back though so I have just learned to live with it. It's not all it's cracked up to be.

I bet you wouldn't give it up though.

[Anonymous]

I get jealous. We send our kid to a preschool in a higher end part of town where all the parents have so much more money than us and I get intimidated by them and get kind of embarrassed by where I am in my life and the neighborhood we live in, but the reality is that my family is doing so much better than so many other families out there and i feel fortunate for what we do have. And as a pp stated, it's all relative - you have no idea what's going on in anyone's lives.

Maybe it's an age thing, but the pursuit of money and wealth matters less and less than leaving a positive legacy on earth while you are here - make the world a better place while you are here and the energy it takes being jealous is energy that can be used in so many other positive ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have all that but I never see my great hubby during the week because he works so hard so we can have big house, nanny, fancy car, country club. I miss the old days when we had less money but more time. He doesn't want to ratchet back though so I have just learned to live with it. It's not all it's cracked up to be.

I totally agree! However, I have been able to put my foot down and keep us in the same house we bought when we were on a much lower income. My DH loves to spend big and live big. We are total opposite in that regard. I would rather save more and have a big pile of money so DH can quit or take a job for 80K that is 40hrs.

I've had to make a lot of friends who are work widows as well, it makes it easier when you are in the same boat with others. I also work PT to keep myself busy.

[Anonymous]

OP, this thread made me realize that I wouldn't want any of my friends' lives over mine, which is a nice thought.

We don't have the life any of you are talking about -- we live in a small house, we don't have or want kids. But we have enough money to outsource the lawn-mowing and house-cleaning, and we usually go out to dinner. Basically, we have no stress -- because we planned it that way (no kids, easy jobs, low material expectations). Many (most?) people wouldn't want my life and wouldn't find it enriching or fulfilling enough, but it's perfect for me.

But considering so many of the complaints on this thread stem from kids, I do wonder why nearly everyone chooses to have them. Presumably, they're worth the stress to most people.

[Anonymous]

I am having a difficult time with an old friend because of this situation as well. I am the well-off friend. She forgets the 7 years I spent raising my children virtually alone during my husband's residency and fellowship. She also makes snide remarks about me being a SAHM and having a cleaning service. However, her husband works 40 hours, mine works 80 hours. I guarantee her life is not as easy as you think it is.

[Anonymous]

Jealous because someone has a nanny? On the contrary, I would never stoop to asking a nanny (or daycare) raise my babies/ young children.

*And to head this off, no, school is not letting someone "raise your kids."

[Anonymous]

I am only envious of people who have loving supportive spouses. I live in a shack and would love to have a house without holes in the walls and ceilings but what I really want is a spouse who is a family partner, not an overgrown potsmoking teenager.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealous because someone has a nanny? On the contrary, I would never stoop to asking a nanny (or daycare) raise my babies/ young children.

*And to head this off, no, school is not letting someone "raise your kids."

way to derail the thread with your own insecurities. hope DH doesn't leave you penniless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealous because someone has a nanny? On the contrary, I would never stoop to asking a nanny (or daycare) raise my babies/ young children.

*And to head this off, no, school is not letting someone "raise your kids."

Why did you go there in this thread? There are many other threads where you can express this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Jealous because someone has a nanny? On the contrary, I would never stoop to asking a nanny (or daycare) raise my babies/ young children.

*And to head this off, no, school is not letting someone "raise your kids."

Why did you go there in this thread? There are many other threads where you can express this.

Come on, you know the answer. Anyone who feels the need to disparage others has intense insecurities. Have pity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Jealous because someone has a nanny? On the contrary, I would never stoop to asking a nanny (or daycare) raise my babies/ young children.

*And to head this off, no, school is not letting someone "raise your kids."

Why did you go there in this thread? There are many other threads where you can express this.

The OP mentions the nanny-thing. Reading is fundamental.