Have a conversation with your sister-in-law. Don't call her an immature, clueless bitch or whatever PPs have said. Just tell her you hadn't told people yet, and you should have been more specific about not posting, and please delete the post for now. I don't know how old your SIL is, but plenty of people haven't figured out what level of privacy they're expected to keep on the internet. and people have widely varying tolerances for what goes out. my cousin posted pics of the inside of her uterus as soon as she saw a heartbeat. i thought it was a bit much, but whatever.
Also, unless you specifically asked them to keep it secret or at least off the internet, you're at least partially to blame here. If you want to tell someone a HUGE, PERSONAL secret, email is dangerous. Call them, tell them, ask them to keep it under wraps for now. If the who-got-told-first fight is really that big a deal, include the same request in the email. For the clueless young and the newly-on-the-interwebs old, be specific - NO FACEBOOK, NO TWITTER, NO OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA PLEASE; I haven't told my boss or close friends yet.
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