Question for those of you whose parents helped with a home purchase

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The gift limit this year is $14,000. So your FIL could give you and your spouse each $14,000 and your MIL could do the same for a total of $56,000. That is if you want to consider the money a gift and not a loan. If it is a true loan, instead of a gift, with a repayment schedule, then the rules change and your lender might not consider it as true down payment.

If it is a gift your lender will require them to sign a form that money is a gift and not to be repaid. If it is a loan, I doubt lender would accept it witb such vague repayment requifements.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The strings go on forever.

Sorry that'd be the case in your family. Wasn't in mine.

Oh, but it one sense it is. In the "no strings attached" way maybe not but in the "still clinging to your momma's apron strings" way... definitely.

Her help has allowed me and my husband to pursue careers we love, rather than wear golden handcuffs, and to have a wonderful and safe home for our children. We are blessed and appreciate it! If making nasty comments out of jealousy or lack of understanding of how a person can be selfless makes you feel better about your own situation, have at it! Doesn't affect me at all.

Cool! I have those things and I got them on my own. I'm blessed and appreciate it as well!

Maybe you should have spent some of that hard work learning to be kind instead of going after the $$.

Amen! - pp who posted about my late mother's help. This person feels some kind of urge to prove her superiority, I guess?

I have to say, I come from nothing and DH's parents didn't come into money until recently (from a relatively small inheritance), so while we have done it all on our own (for the most part), I would be delighted beyond measure if we were in a position to help our children like this one day. I WANT to be able to give my kids an easier start into adulthood than I had. I wouldn't pay for everything outright because I want them to have a similar appreciation for hard work and a feeling of their own accomplishment, but to the extent that I can help, I would love to. Some PP's do sound jealous. I'm not jealous, just envious (and curious obviously since I clicked on the thread).

[Anonymous]

If I won the lottery tomorrow, I would give kids and relatives I love and who I know could use it some money. Why is it different in this situation?

OP, I also come from a culture in which it is the norm (but certainly not a must) to give money when married and for other occasions...good luck with the house!

[Anonymous]

Interesting how a number of posters criticizing "handouts" have terrible spelling and/or grammar. Makes me think it's just jealousy.

For those of you criticizing - imagine you made it to retirement with significant wealth. Your children are happy, healthy, working adults. Perhaps they have kids of their own. Would you really not give them a financial leg up if thy needed it - to help with school loans, or towards a better home in which to raise their family? I can't even fathom that mentality. Disgusts me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I won the lottery tomorrow, I would give kids and relatives I love and who I know could use it some money. Why is it different in this situation?

OP, I also come from a culture in which it is the norm (but certainly not a must) to give money when married and for other occasions...good luck with the house!

At 35% gift tax for anything over $14,000 and you pay the tax

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how a number of posters criticizing "handouts" have terrible spelling and/or grammar. Makes me think it's just jealousy.

For those of you criticizing - imagine you made it to retirement with significant wealth. Your children are happy, healthy, working adults. Perhaps they have kids of their own. Would you really not give them a financial leg up if thy needed it - to help with school loans, or towards a better home in which to raise their family? I can't even fathom that mentality. Disgusts me.

No, I would not. I brought them up to live within their means.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting how a number of posters criticizing "handouts" have terrible spelling and/or grammar. Makes me think it's just jealousy.

For those of you criticizing - imagine you made it to retirement with significant wealth. Your children are happy, healthy, working adults. Perhaps they have kids of their own. Would you really not give them a financial leg up if thy needed it - to help with school loans, or towards a better home in which to raise their family? I can't even fathom that mentality. Disgusts me.

No, I would not. I brought them up to live within their means.

So you'd sit on a pile of money while your family struggled? Hope those holier-than-thou morals comfort you at your deathbed.

[Anonymous]

NP here. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA...

Thanks for the helpful info. Laughing at the fact that MIL would ever offer anything as a "gift", as successful DH (at age 18) borrowed money from her once, and she actually charged DH (HER SON) significant interest......

HAHHAHAHAHAHA....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I won the lottery tomorrow, I would give kids and relatives I love and who I know could use it some money. Why is it different in this situation?

OP, I also come from a culture in which it is the norm (but certainly not a must) to give money when married and for other occasions...good luck with the house!

At 35% gift tax for anything over $14,000 and you pay the tax

OP said the amount is like pocket change to inlaws, so I guess they would be fine. They can do what they want and give their money to whom ever they choose.

[Anonymous]

My parents also had to give their bank statements for the past 2 months to show where the money came from. This was in addition to the gift letter and it almost caused them to say forget it. So be prepared for that or get the money in your account and leave it at least 6 months.

[Anonymous]

I am PP this was in 2012. The rules have changed. Be prepared to document when you last took at shit and how it smelled.

[Anonymous]

Dh and I bought our house with our own money. We also paid for school ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dh and I bought our house with our own money. We also paid for school ourselves.

Great! And if you or your husband had financially comfortable parents or in-laws, and they offered to help, you would've said no?

[Anonymous]

Law Review at a top three law school in the mid 2000's. 75% of the board was doing law school on their own. Coincidence? Maybe. But I think having skin (substantial skin) in the game typocally increases the drive to succeed.

[Anonymous]

17:42 here. Still laughing.

But i Knew it was just a matter of time before this post took this direction of questioning....

DH and I paid for our own undregrad, grad, law schools, homes, you name it.

Newsflash: I don't know many people who go into the world as a teenager with a wad of cash in their hands. I am proud to call the self made people, who expect absolutely nothing from anyone (ever), my friends.