Laura Bush - yay or nay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I married at 25, my husband was my best friend, and 26 years later we are still best friends. It's better when you can grow up together and grow together. We have so many things we found and tried, for the first time, together. We built a business together with 40 employees and we have three great teenagers.

If you find your love, it doesn't matter what age you are. You just have to have the commitment and the humor to see it through. Humor - most of all.

Good luck Jenna - she's a very sweet young woman and has a strong marriage between her parents as an example. You may not agree with her father's politics, but there has never been ONE word of scandal when it comes to his commitment to his wife.

Yay Laura, Yay Jenna, Yay Hillary, Yay Chelsea - Yay to all of those of you are committed to your family, your careers and your image of yourselves as strong women!

I appreciate your sharing your experience without the scathing remarks of the other pp who married @25. I'm sure that's what we're all looking for/were looking for when we were 25. Some people need the additional experiences to mature them and to create some depth. Every generation has their opportunities and choices. Mature committed parents also set an example for their children to follow.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Jenna is rehabilitating her image. I heard her telling an interviewer that at a function we were both attending last summer. He asked her what she was doing to shed her wild party girl image and she explained. And it looks like she's succeeded, based on posts like 11:05!

I don't think much of Jenna. On top of that, she married too young.

She's 26 - it isn't like she got married at 18! What's wrong with getting married at 26 - so she find the right person at that time in her life. Lots of people do and it's really not that big of a deal!

My opinion of Laura has changed over the years and I am in the "yay" camp now. Before, I didn't think too much of her. But I do like her now - she seems like the type of person I would enjoy having as a neighbor.

The Bush twins have also grown on me (and yes, I still like Chelsea. It doesn't have to be one or the other, kwim?)

You really believe that you know yourself before 30? She went from her father's roof to her husband's roof. There is limited self-exploration when this happens. 26 is still way too young in this modern age, especially in an industrialized country where college educated women have so many options to explore the world and themselves beofre getting married and having children. I think if you can do both before getting married or having children, you have more rich experiences to offer to the husband and children.

Wow, judgemental much? Just because YOU didn't "know" yourself (whatever that means) before 30 doesn't mean that no one does. I graduated college, got married, worked for a few years, "found" myself and realized I wanted to begin a family, had my daughter at 25, stayed home for a few years (you know, because I had the flexibility at a young age to FIND myself as a mother) and have absolutely no regrets. I am able to experience my entire adult life (all of the questions, ups and downs, first interviews, first jobs - all of it) witha man I love. It's been great! He's my best friend and I have absolutely no regrets. I'm still finding myself and getting to know myself on different levels each and every day. You're a fool to think that we all follow the same path in life - I didn't realize that at age 30 a lightbulb goes off and I suddenly "know" important and mystical things (it didn't happen, as I'm now 32). Your comments are really ridiculous. I feel fortunate to be able to form my life and persona along with my husband and kids. Being a youg mom and wife has many advantages.

There's a reason 50% of marriages don't survive. Much of it has to do with being immature & marrying too early. You sound rather immature for someone of 32 years. I guess this is a personal topic for you, but there are few people like you, particularly in the highly educated populace of DC. YOU are the fool. For previous generations, your plan was the only formula for women, educated or uneducated. No, there is no lightbulb that goes off at age 30 to say, "Hey I get it now." Yippee for you. I'm sure you have a lot of varied open-minded experiences to share with your children. You worked for 3 whole years as an admin assistant before having a baby. Wow! You sound like such an INTERESTING person. If I ever met you, I'm sure our conversations would center around, ... the weather. Even that, we would not agree on. Global warming, oh no, there's no global warming. It's just hotter than normal the past several years.

I guess you're offended bc you did not have the balls to go explore, all by yourself... to explore the world or explore your character, to find out what you are made of. Bet your husband is bowled over by your fascinating experiences before you met.

Well, I shouldn't even respond. My husband and I will not be getting divorced. I am not a bitter or angry person. That would be you. I have had many experiences in life and not one of them included being an admin asst (and you know what - even if I were, who cares?? What does that matter to you?) I am successful, yet took my own path, which has nothing to do with you. I have plenty of time to explore myself. I have a good husband who cherishes who I am and we pursue interests both separately and together.

And, why on Earth do you think I can't carry a conversation? Because I had a child at 25 by choice? Sorry, I think you're the ignorant one who needs to get out a little more and realize that the world is filled with all kinds of people. Yes, I know I'm a rarity in DC. SO?? Do I have to be like everyone else? I have a graduate degree (which I obtained at night while my children were young), I've been back at work for 5 years where I am now a VP in my department. So, sorry I didn't fit into your little bubble of an uneducated person who married young and had children young. It's actually filled my life more than a few more years of work could ever do. I have plenty of time for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just because you didn't know yourself in your 20's doesn't mean that other people don't. I got married at almost 26, am expecting a baby at 30, and feel incredibly lucky that I found my husband so young. I would never presume that just because someone is unmarried at 40 that they are, say, a bitter old maid, nor would I assume that because someone gets married at 25 or 26 that they are flighty and immature and that the marriage is doomed. You sound particularly hateful and judgmental, even for this board, which is saying a lot. I feel really sorry for you, actually, that you are able to generalize against so many people you don't even know with such vitriol.

Few people I knew who were in their 20s knew what they wanted. I don't know why it's perceived as so hateful that I advocate traveling, opening up your mind, seeing other perspectives before getting married. During the journey, you learn that there really is no ONE way of doing things. Thanks for your insight, young bride. I think you and 11:33 have illustrated my point bc you yourselves cannot see from other perspectives without getting bent out of shape.

[Anonymous]

Even mature people get bent out of shape when people are so obviously mean and judgmental as you are. "Young bride"? How condescending. I will not trot out my resume for you, but I was well-educated, well-traveled, and gainfully employed even though I got married young.

And just so you know, people still travel, open up their minds, and learn about other perspectives even after they get married. Learning, maturing, and doing interesting and worthwhile things do not suddenly stop on your wedding day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just because you didn't know yourself in your 20's doesn't mean that other people don't. I got married at almost 26, am expecting a baby at 30, and feel incredibly lucky that I found my husband so young. I would never presume that just because someone is unmarried at 40 that they are, say, a bitter old maid, nor would I assume that because someone gets married at 25 or 26 that they are flighty and immature and that the marriage is doomed. You sound particularly hateful and judgmental, even for this board, which is saying a lot. I feel really sorry for you, actually, that you are able to generalize against so many people you don't even know with such vitriol.

Few people I knew who were in their 20s knew what they wanted. I don't know why it's perceived as so hateful that I advocate traveling, opening up your mind, seeing other perspectives before getting married. During the journey, you learn that there really is no ONE way of doing things. Thanks for your insight, young bride. I think you and 11:33 have illustrated my point bc you yourselves cannot see from other perspectives without getting bent out of shape.

Actually, 11:43, you seem very naive and sheltered. You do realize that there are plenty of people out there who do know what they want while in their twenties, don't you? And you do realize that there are plenty of "older" people in their thirties and forties who are married, have kids and still have no clue who they are, right? I certainly hope that you realize your mind does not shut on your wedding day and you can still grow as a person even if you have a ring on your finger!

I bet it would kill you that I met my husband when I was in college (egads!) and we started dating when I was a few weeks shy of turning 21 (oh, the horrors!). We married when I was 26 and we had our first daughter when I was thirty. In between, I graduated from college (in time, too!), worked, received my master's from a top 10 university, traveled, moved to DC with DH, started our new life here then had our kids. Oh and I do think I kept an open mind the entire time. Heck, I still think I have an open mind. That's why I know it's ridiculous to make the broad, sweeping generalizations you made about marrying young. I recognize that everyone is different and marrying at the "young" age of 26 is not this death sentence you make it out to be.

I hope you escape from your little bubble and explore the wider world, open your mind to all different types of people and realize that just because someone chose a different path in life than you did doesn't make it wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just because you didn't know yourself in your 20's doesn't mean that other people don't. I got married at almost 26, am expecting a baby at 30, and feel incredibly lucky that I found my husband so young. I would never presume that just because someone is unmarried at 40 that they are, say, a bitter old maid, nor would I assume that because someone gets married at 25 or 26 that they are flighty and immature and that the marriage is doomed. You sound particularly hateful and judgmental, even for this board, which is saying a lot. I feel really sorry for you, actually, that you are able to generalize against so many people you don't even know with such vitriol.

Few people I knew who were in their 20s knew what they wanted. I don't know why it's perceived as so hateful that I advocate traveling, opening up your mind, seeing other perspectives before getting married. During the journey, you learn that there really is no ONE way of doing things. Thanks for your insight, young bride. I think you and 11:33 have illustrated my point bc you yourselves cannot see from other perspectives without getting bent out of shape.

Actually, 11:43, you seem very naive and sheltered. You do realize that there are plenty of people out there who do know what they want while in their twenties, don't you? And you do realize that there are plenty of "older" people in their thirties and forties who are married, have kids and still have no clue who they are, right? I certainly hope that you realize your mind does not shut on your wedding day and you can still grow as a person even if you have a ring on your finger!

I bet it would kill you that I met my husband when I was in college (egads!) and we started dating when I was a few weeks shy of turning 21 (oh, the horrors!). We married when I was 26 and we had our first daughter when I was thirty. In between, I graduated from college (in time, too!), worked, received my master's from a top 10 university, traveled, moved to DC with DH, started our new life here then had our kids. Oh and I do think I kept an open mind the entire time. Heck, I still think I have an open mind. That's why I know it's ridiculous to make the broad, sweeping generalizations you made about marrying young. I recognize that everyone is different and marrying at the "young" age of 26 is not this death sentence you make it out to be.

I hope you escape from your little bubble and explore the wider world, open your mind to all different types of people and realize that just because someone chose a different path in life than you did doesn't make it wrong.

This is an opinion blog, right? I expressed my Opinion. To say that I said it was [i]wrong, is strong. I know there is no guarantee that you know things at 20, 30, or 40. I guess I hit a nerve with you women who married in your mid-20s. Congratulations that you found someone so right for you in your 20s. Between careers, potty training, sending thank you notes (or not), researching public/private schools, and flaming people with experienced-based opinions, I'm sure you had a lot of free time to go explore and keep an open-mind. I guess I socialized with people who were more independent.

If everyone could lead such a charmed life as yours, I'm sure there would be no sniping on DCUM. What is your mind open to? Obviously not to difference of opinion. If you have to defend yourselves in such a violent manner, obviously, you don't believe it yourselves.

[Anonymous]

This is an opinion blog, right? I expressed my Opinion. To say that I said it was wrong, is strong.

Well, you weren't just talking about wrong *for you*, you were making judgments that it was wrong for all other people as well. You said quite clearly that Jenna Bush married too young and you called the first poster who responded to you a "fool." It's not surprising that people would respond to you in a harsh manner as well.

[Anonymous]

This is an opinion blog, right? I expressed my Opinion. To say that I said it was wrong, is strong. I know there is no guarantee that you know things at 20, 30, or 40. I guess I hit a nerve with you women who married in your mid-20s. Congratulations that you found someone so right for you in your 20s. Between careers, potty training, sending thank you notes (or not), researching public/private schools, and flaming people with experienced-based opinions, I'm sure you had a lot of free time to go explore and keep an open-mind. I guess I socialized with people who were more independent.

If everyone could lead such a charmed life as yours, I'm sure there would be no sniping on DCUM. What is your mind open to? Obviously not to difference of opinion. If you have to defend yourselves in such a violent manner, obviously, you don't believe it yourselves.

Um, you're the one who doesn't have an open mind to difference of opinion. You're the one who seems to have a problem with people marrying young. Not me since I don't care when people get married.

I would respond to your sentence of "Between careers...blah blah blah...more independent" but frankly it makes no sense.

Really, get out of your bubble and explore the world. If you think my initial post was written in a violent manner, then your bubble is far more sheltered than I had originally thought.

[Anonymous]

I find it very strange that put-downs on marrying age are almost always slanted one way: from those who married later (after 30) against those who married earlier (early to mid 20s). I very rarely hear anyone who married "earlier" put down someone for marrying later. The "earlier" bunch seems to have much more of a live-and-let-live perspective on this. So it took someone a longer time to find the person they wanted to spend the rest of their life with - this makes them better than someone who found their life partner earlier how?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

This is an opinion blog, right? I expressed my Opinion. To say that I said it was wrong, is strong.

Well, you weren't just talking about wrong *for you*, you were making judgments that it was wrong for all other people as well. You said quite clearly that Jenna Bush married too young and you called the first poster who responded to you a "fool." It's not surprising that people would respond to you in a harsh manner as well.

I called her a fool bc she abrasively called me one. I don't lay into posters bc they disagree with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just because you didn't know yourself in your 20's doesn't mean that other people don't. I got married at almost 26, am expecting a baby at 30, and feel incredibly lucky that I found my husband so young. I would never presume that just because someone is unmarried at 40 that they are, say, a bitter old maid, nor would I assume that because someone gets married at 25 or 26 that they are flighty and immature and that the marriage is doomed. You sound particularly hateful and judgmental, even for this board, which is saying a lot. I feel really sorry for you, actually, that you are able to generalize against so many people you don't even know with such vitriol.

Few people I knew who were in their 20s knew what they wanted. I don't know why it's perceived as so hateful that I advocate traveling, opening up your mind, seeing other perspectives before getting married. During the journey, you learn that there really is no ONE way of doing things. Thanks for your insight, young bride. I think you and 11:33 have illustrated my point bc you yourselves cannot see from other perspectives without getting bent out of shape.

Actually, 11:43, you seem very naive and sheltered. You do realize that there are plenty of people out there who do know what they want while in their twenties, don't you? And you do realize that there are plenty of "older" people in their thirties and forties who are married, have kids and still have no clue who they are, right? I certainly hope that you realize your mind does not shut on your wedding day and you can still grow as a person even if you have a ring on your finger!

I bet it would kill you that I met my husband when I was in college (egads!) and we started dating when I was a few weeks shy of turning 21 (oh, the horrors!). We married when I was 26 and we had our first daughter when I was thirty. In between, I graduated from college (in time, too!), worked, received my master's from a top 10 university, traveled, moved to DC with DH, started our new life here then had our kids. Oh and I do think I kept an open mind the entire time. Heck, I still think I have an open mind. That's why I know it's ridiculous to make the broad, sweeping generalizations you made about marrying young. I recognize that everyone is different and marrying at the "young" age of 26 is not this death sentence you make it out to be.

I hope you escape from your little bubble and explore the wider world, open your mind to all different types of people and realize that just because someone chose a different path in life than you did doesn't make it wrong.

This is an opinion blog, right? I expressed my Opinion. To say that I said it was [i]wrong, is strong. I know there is no guarantee that you know things at 20, 30, or 40. I guess I hit a nerve with you women who married in your mid-20s. Congratulations that you found someone so right for you in your 20s. Between careers, potty training, sending thank you notes (or not), researching public/private schools, and flaming people with experienced-based opinions, I'm sure you had a lot of free time to go explore and keep an open-mind. I guess I socialized with people who were more independent.

If everyone could lead such a charmed life as yours, I'm sure there would be no sniping on DCUM. What is your mind open to? Obviously not to difference of opinion. If you have to defend yourselves in such a violent manner, obviously, you don't believe it yourselves.

Wow, it's really a wonder as to why you weren't snatched up by a fellow in YOUR 20s! I can't imagine why a guy would pass on someone so EXPERIENCED and open minded!! Ugh.

If your life experiences end with marriage and children, perhaps you should have neither. For some of us it's a happy and fulfilling life, no matter what age it begins.

[Anonymous]

The participants in this discussion seem to need a great deal of therapy!

[Anonymous]

bump

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

For some of us it's a happy and fulfilling life, no matter what age it begins.

Then why are there so many posts on this blog about the lack of satisfaction with relationships, marriages, other anxieties?