Affording Private School Tuition

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems the value of a private school is greatly slanted here and simply part of weak attempts to keep up with the perceived next guy. Where are you from that this area has such "great" private school education? I find that such an odd belief, having lived in many different areas. Every single day I hear about what "great" public schools are in the area, so which is it? ie: if the public schools are so wonderful, why chant the benefits of the area private schools? It seems unlikely that both would be true, though I do know of one area where it is (not here). It just seems some are so desperately clinging to the "who you know" philosophy, which can not possibly hold true to the extent they believe. There are so many who think they are more important than they are, though some underlings may fail miserably to see the difference. I have seen some people be very, very disappointed and would not wish that on anyone.

Do you actually live in DC? Or even in this area? I'm going to assume you're in Fairfax county if you're talking about the great public schools. Or maybe Montgomery County.

This is 140K HHI here. I can't speak for anyone else but we absolutely do not give a rat's ass where anyone else's kids go, including the "next guy"'s. The DCPS is mediocre in some areas, pretty darn good in a few (upper NW areas) and downright dangerous everywhere else.

People who live in PG County have the worst schools (speaking generally, but unfortunately it's largely true).

Basically, outside of Fairfax County, where are these exemplary public schools you're discussing? I think you need to educate yourself.

Also, many folks don't like the public schools focus on testing and teaching to the test, and feel that a private school gives them more say in the type of education they get. They may want to do faith based, waldorf, montessori (though there are some public montessoris) and so on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The DC-area has some of the nation's top private schools. Many people under-state the residual value of being educated in such environments. When you're talking about the top tier, the dividends often continue for decades, in terms of employment opportunities, professional referrals, etc. etc. So though some may be quick to call such education expenses a waste, they're not accounting for many of the long-term dividends their children might reap. Not only do I see strong professional cliques from my Ivy League college persisting for years, but even more so for those who went to elite prep schools (a la Sidwell, Exeter, Andover, Georgetown Day etc.) many social/professional networks stay intact for decades. Good or bad, it's a reality.

Most (not all) of the successful people I know came from public schools and have a large network from those days (though the college network is more important).

There is no doubt that people feel the same the PP does re connections coming out of the elite privates; this is what feeds the frenzy. You either believe it or not, or are not sure. I frankly want more solid evidence before I spend more than 1.2 million educate my 3 kids at an elite private (K-12).

I have plenty of first hand experience to show that the publics in MoCo provide much of the same benefits and education, with a large dose of good old parenting to fill any gaps. I have had more than one family from an elite private tell me -- you know, it is all up to the parents. I truly believe this is true.

[Anonymous]

[b]Not that pp-- but Arlington county has phenomenal schools and offers choice...say a "science oriented elem" (not offered in other counties) vs traditional or dual immersion, etc. Ppl always skip over AC when it also has the
Most walkable hoods and ability to quickly bike or metro downtown.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems the value of a private school is greatly slanted here and simply part of weak attempts to keep up with the perceived next guy. Where are you from that this area has such "great" private school education? I find that such an odd belief, having lived in many different areas. Every single day I hear about what "great" public schools are in the area, so which is it? ie: if the public schools are so wonderful, why chant the benefits of the area private schools? It seems unlikely that both would be true, though I do know of one area where it is (not here). It just seems some are so desperately clinging to the "who you know" philosophy, which can not possibly hold true to the extent they believe. There are so many who think they are more important than they are, though some underlings may fail miserably to see the difference. I have seen some people be very, very disappointed and would not wish that on anyone.

Do you actually live in DC? Or even in this area? I'm going to assume you're in Fairfax county if you're talking about the great public schools. Or maybe Montgomery County.

This is 140K HHI here. I can't speak for anyone else but we absolutely do not give a rat's ass where anyone else's kids go, including the "next guy"'s. The DCPS is mediocre in some areas, pretty darn good in a few (upper NW areas) and downright dangerous everywhere else.

People who live in PG County have the worst schools (speaking generally, but unfortunately it's largely true).

Basically, outside of Fairfax County, where are these exemplary public schools you're discussing? I think you need to educate yourself.

Also, many folks don't like the public schools focus on testing and teaching to the test, and feel that a private school gives them more say in the type of education they get. They may want to do faith based, waldorf, montessori (though there are some public montessoris) and so on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems the value of a private school is greatly slanted here and simply part of weak attempts to keep up with the perceived next guy. Where are you from that this area has such "great" private school education? I find that such an odd belief, having lived in many different areas. Every single day I hear about what "great" public schools are in the area, so which is it? ie: if the public schools are so wonderful, why chant the benefits of the area private schools? It seems unlikely that both would be true, though I do know of one area where it is (not here). It just seems some are so desperately clinging to the "who you know" philosophy, which can not possibly hold true to the extent they believe. There are so many who think they are more important than they are, though some underlings may fail miserably to see the difference. I have seen some people be very, very disappointed and would not wish that on anyone.

Do you actually live in DC? Or even in this area? I'm going to assume you're in Fairfax county if you're talking about the great public schools. Or maybe Montgomery County.

This is 140K HHI here. I can't speak for anyone else but we absolutely do not give a rat's ass where anyone else's kids go, including the "next guy"'s. The DCPS is mediocre in some areas, pretty darn good in a few (upper NW areas) and downright dangerous everywhere else.

People who live in PG County have the worst schools (speaking generally, but unfortunately it's largely true).

Basically, outside of Fairfax County, where are these exemplary public schools you're discussing? I think you need to educate yourself.

Also, many folks don't like the public schools focus on testing and teaching to the test, and feel that a private school gives them more say in the type of education they get. They may want to do faith based, waldorf, montessori (though there are some public montessoris) and so on.

The exemplary schools are just over the bridge in Arlington County.

[Anonymous]

Expensive shoe poster here. We are not on financial aid, PP. In fact, we contribute heavily to the financial aid fund. Our HHI is over 800K, although it was not nearly that high when our kids first started in private.

OP asked at what HHI someone could afford to send one or two kids to private school. She has received a variety of responses that seem to be in the at least 300-400 range, although she has received many more from people who believe she shouldn't make the choice unless she has certain things taken care of first, such as retirment and college. That wasn't what she asked.

My point in my post was that not everyone views what is spent on the kids' education as something that takes a lower priority than retirement savings. We do save for retirement and college. Retirement savings could be more. Why is it not more? Because of choices we make aside from private school tuition. Everyone makes lifestyle choices every day. Go to Starbucks or not? Buy a $10+ lunch every day? Buy those shoes or that car or that house? It's a choice. When I look at money I waste, I have never put my kids' education in the waste column. It was what was best for our children. If you honestly believe private is best for your children, and you have an HHI over $400K or so, and you have only one or two kids, you could make it work, probably without doing anything too drastic. If you choose not to make it work, that is fine, too. It's up to you what you think is best for your kids and your family. What is best for my kids and my family is that the kids go to school where they are going. It has nothing to do with keeping up with anybody (and I think that is a really crappy reason to send your kids to a private school). It has to do with whether you can find a school that is a really great fit for your kid. I would never send my kid to a school - public or private - that wasn't a good fit. Since I found a school that was a good fit for them, I will never regret the money we spend on it, even if I live to be 105 and almost run out of money in retirement. If OP sends her kids to a school that isn't right for them, then I think she would regret the money.

[Anonymous]

We can do it for 1 kid in private with $225K HHI. We have no debt beyond mortgage ($3200 PITI). We don't feel like we are struggling, but aside from our WF indulgence, we also don't buy very expensive things. We max out 401ks and put $800 into college savings every month. We have a decent safety net. And we both have stable, though not terribly lucrative, jobs.

We drive a Honda, buy clothes on sale from Land's End and Loehmanns, shop at Costco, travel to see family, and eat mostly at home. We don't have cable, but we do have FIOS. We don't have iPads and fancy cell phones. I don't indulge in expensive shoes or bags more than once every 5 years (I think if I'm going spend $300 on a bag, that it should last me at least 5 years; and I think buying Louis Vuitton or the equivalent is a joke). DH works for the gov't and buys dept store suits that last him 5 years. We don't have a housekeeper, but our house is uncluttered and clean. All these things add up, but I think that we prioritize good food and fewer, but higher quality purchases. We place little premium on flash.

If we were to have 2 kids, I think we'd need a HHI of $275 to $300 to maintain our current lifestyle.

Personally, I think that private school tuition is worth it if your kid gets into a school that can provide a curriculum and *culture* that a very good public school can't. So, yes, I do think that a "big 3" is worth more a middle-tier private school. I also think that a school like WIS is worth it because they can provide language immersion in a way that even Oyster can't. I think also that if your child has special needs, that a private school may very well be worth the tuition.

[Anonymous]

14:00 - You are so right, what the hell do I know. We only have top grades from the top colleges in the world. BTW, we and everyone we know from our colleges are products of (gasp!) public schools. Okay, go ahead and finish finding your cure for cancer now. Oh wait, that is us.

We prefer our children to have lives more similar to our own via public schools. We know a good number of those whose children are in private, but they often complain about the attitudes (without calling it such) of the children (and needless to say, the parents) in those schools. We prefer our children to be better adjusted given the choice, regardless of HHI (thankfully not a factor for us).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Expensive shoe poster here. We are not on financial aid, PP. In fact, we contribute heavily to the financial aid fund. Our HHI is over 800K, although it was not nearly that high when our kids first started in private.

OP asked at what HHI someone could afford to send one or two kids to private school. She has received a variety of responses that seem to be in the at least 300-400 range, although she has received many more from people who believe she shouldn't make the choice unless she has certain things taken care of first, such as retirment and college. That wasn't what she asked.

My point in my post was that not everyone views what is spent on the kids' education as something that takes a lower priority than retirement savings. We do save for retirement and college. Retirement savings could be more. Why is it not more? Because of choices we make aside from private school tuition. Everyone makes lifestyle choices every day. Go to Starbucks or not? Buy a $10+ lunch every day? Buy those shoes or that car or that house? It's a choice. When I look at money I waste, I have never put my kids' education in the waste column. It was what was best for our children. If you honestly believe private is best for your children, and you have an HHI over $400K or so, and you have only one or two kids, you could make it work, probably without doing anything too drastic. If you choose not to make it work, that is fine, too. It's up to you what you think is best for your kids and your family. What is best for my kids and my family is that the kids go to school where they are going. It has nothing to do with keeping up with anybody (and I think that is a really crappy reason to send your kids to a private school). It has to do with whether you can find a school that is a really great fit for your kid. I would never send my kid to a school - public or private - that wasn't a good fit. Since I found a school that was a good fit for them, I will never regret the money we spend on it, even if I live to be 105 and almost run out of money in retirement. If OP sends her kids to a school that isn't right for them, then I think she would regret the money.

Maybe you should have stated your HHI in your first post; you obviously can afford both private tuition and a closet-full of expensive shoes. But, that doesn't mean people making half that and not sending their kids to private feel that lattes and stilettos are more important.

[Anonymous]

The Secretary of Education sends his children to PUBLIC school in Arlington. One would think that he knows a thing or two about the schools (private and public) in the area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We pay $50,000 a year for schooling 4 kids, and make about $220,000 a year. Obviously not the "Big 3" types of schools everyone thinks of, but we are happy.

sorry for the ignorance, but what big 3? I just relocated here from out of state

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The Secretary of Education sends his children to PUBLIC school in Arlington. One would think that he knows a thing or two about the schools (private and public) in the area.

This is stupid. Of course he does- he has no choice. Bad political move to do otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The Secretary of Education sends his children to PUBLIC school in Arlington. One would think that he knows a thing or two about the schools (private and public) in the area.

Yep. Smaller county than Ffx or Montg. With better location and better schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Secretary of Education sends his children to PUBLIC school in Arlington. One would think that he knows a thing or two about the schools (private and public) in the area.

This is stupid. Of course he does- he has no choice. Bad political move to do otherwise.

Really? Perhaps you could explain the President's choice? According to your theory, the President would be expected to chose public over Sidwell. Are you saying that he made a bad political move?

[Anonymous]

OK fine, I'll add Arlington to the mix of "exemplary" public schools. Nonetheless, I wanted the option to look for an education that suits my values, and most publics fall short (competitive - yes, competitive, in public!, too much homework, push the kids so soon they don't like to learn.). I want a play-based learning approach in the early years, then a laid back environment in the later years. I took half the year while in middle school to travel the world with my parents and learned more in that year than I ever did in school. I graduated from a terrible public school but did just fine. I was accepted into two ivies but decided to go to a state college instead. I'm extremely happy with my choices. Not everyone looking for private is looking for the Sidwell experience. I actually want a school that's LESS competitive. So that's why public is not for me. AND, because I'm in DC. And while exemplary public schools (which may not fit the bill for my kids anyway) may be just across the river, I have absolutely NO desire to live in Virginia. Or MD for that matter. I prefer the city.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Secretary of Education sends his children to PUBLIC school in Arlington. One would think that he knows a thing or two about the schools (private and public) in the area.

Yep. Smaller county than Ffx or Montg. With better location and better schools.

But not for kids that need GT services. FFX and Montgomery Counties excel in GT services.