Capital Cotillion for Beauvoir Son

[Anonymous]

I'm missing something here. My daughter goes to Mrs. Simpson's, where she sees a hundred people she already knows, from school, soccer, summer camps, music lessons, and so on. She has no perception of "special" or "master" relative to the dance class. Why do you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm missing something here. My daughter goes to Mrs. Simpson's, where she sees a hundred people she already knows, from school, soccer, summer camps, music lessons, and so on. She has no perception of "special" or "master" relative to the dance class. Why do you?

First off, I am in no way judging your decision to have your child participate in Mrs. Simpson's. Just curious as to why there is a selection process -- versus just an enrollment process -- for the class.

[Anonymous]

My daughter was invited to participate in cotillion, as were all the other girls in our private school. "Everybody" wanted to go. "Everybody" went, minus the one girl whose family couldn't afford it. "Everybody" (that includes kids and parents) knew why she wasn't there.

[Anonymous]

I participated in a similar program when I was in mid-elementary school. Some kids attended public school, some private. I only recall that fact because I knew the kids at my public school and remember meeting some kids from the local private school. I enjoyed it, and it was my first formal introduction to manners in group settings. This introduction certainly wasn't necessary, but it was nice for me to be familiar with the concepts. The "lessons" weren't anything too formal, but I think they gave me a better sense about taking turns in conversation, correcting people without needing to call attention to their errors and that type of thing. The only "lesson" I remember about dances was that a boy (yes, somewhat outdated that I'm sure it was assumed the boy did the asking) should not approach two girls and ask one to dance, leaving the other standing there alone. I actually think some adults could benefit from some of these social graces.

As far as exclusivity is concerned, I'm not crazy about the idea of an invite only system, but I don't read too much into it. In any event, pretty much everything around here (and around the world) separates people in various ways. Our neighborhoods, professions, economic status, religions, politics, etc. can all do so. In my view, everyone should make efforts to interact with people in different groups (however that is defined), but I think that the notion that participation in an invite-only class for kids instills a view that the kids are superior is misplaced. Perhaps parents can instill that notion in kids, just as parents can instill any misconception. I wonder what our kids would think of all of us if they could read all of the stereotypes we view each other with based on very limited information? Now that would be far worse in my view than a month at Mrs. Simpson's, white gloves included!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can someone fill me in on the Cotillion? I am ignorant to this, but strangely fascinated:

- Who organizes it?
- Who gets invited in? Is it kids who go to certain schools? Or is it certain kids at certain schools?
- Do the events continue throughout childhood, or does it stop after 1 yr?

Fill me in...

This is the above poster again. I am suspecting that there is a cloak of secrecy over this cotillion thing, as no one has responded to my questions... Hummm...

Is anyone willing to break the skull and bones cloak here? (I am not the PP, just curious now.)

[Anonymous]

Sometimes, you just need to Google:

http://capitalcotillion.com/html/about_us.html

[Anonymous]

Capital Cotillion and Mrs. Simpson's are two very different things. Mrs. Simpson's is an invite only activity where parents have to fill out an applicatoin listing their club memberships and debutante year if any. Capital Cotillion is open to anyone who wants to sign up (although I do assume that there is limited space like any activity). Both accomplish the same goal but go about it in vastly differently philosophic ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes, you just need to Google:

http://capitalcotillion.com/html/about_us.html

I am actually now going to rethink my opinion on Capitol Cotillion. I appreciate the fact that they seem to offer opportunities to all via the Internet.

Sounds like Mrs. Simpson's is a bunch of snobs. I don't agree with the invitation only concept - it is hurtful to others and is against the values that I want my children to have - inclusiveness and respect for all.

[Anonymous]

So, you had a strong negative opinion on the Capitol Cotillion without knowing anything about it? And we are supposed to pay attention to you views on Mrs Simpson's, about which you probably know even less??

Hmm ... maybe what we need is an invitation only website ...

[Anonymous]

I'd just note that I (a completely different poster than any recent ones) have observed both Mrs. Simpson's and CC dances and know many families who have sent their children to both. My definite impression is that the snobbishness at Mrs. Simpson's is far higher than that at CC (though this is usually much more evident among the parents than the children).

Beyond anything else, Mrs. Simpson's is just downright silly (and petty) sometimes. For example, there have been families whose oldest child didn't accept an invitation, so every other child in the family was blacklisted from ever joining.

[Anonymous]

Back in the day, it was fairly easy to get boys into cotillion classes.

[Anonymous]

Is this Mrs. Simpson's the same Friday night etiquette/dance class that used to take place years and years ago in the Beauvoir School? White gloves, punch glasses, receiving line and everything?

I do remember hating going as a child (and missing every other school dance on Friday nights). But, I must say that as an adult, the simple etiquette I learned there was invaluable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, you had a strong negative opinion on the Capitol Cotillion without knowing anything about it? And we are supposed to pay attention to you views on Mrs Simpson's, about which you probably know even less??

Hmm ... maybe what we need is an invitation only website ...

Thanks for your judgment! I was following out of interest. My child is years away from this. I was interested to read what various people wrote about the two groups. That, combined with experience from friends/acquaintances who did Cotillion and other exclusive clubs/organizations, led me to develop views. It would be difficult to NOT end up with some kind of opinion based on the advice everyone offers.

I thought it was interesting that Capitol Cotillion has a website and that you can request an invitation. Seemed much more egalitarian than others had suggested. I could not, for the life of me, find a website for Mrs. Simpson's. That, along with the many comments about Mrs. Simpson's on this forum, makes me feel like it is an elitist group and I am not comfortable with that for children.

No idea what you mean by an invitation-only website? You can get that through other mother's groups if that is what you want or need. I thought this was an open forum for discussion. I like the fact that we can voice opinions and sometimes we can disagree and sometimes we can even be swayed in a different direction.

[Anonymous]

I think the last part about an "invitation only website" was a joke.

[Anonymous]

We have a Beauvoir 2nd grader who also received an invitation to Capital Cotillion. If we do not accept now, will we get another invitation next year? We think the Cotillion idea would be good for DC, but would like to put this off for a year or two.