What can I do on this HHI?

[Anonymous]

No to private
No to maxing out 401k
No to 529
Use the money to invest. The long term capital gains taxes are lower than ordinary income taxes. You will have enough to pay for college in cash for all kids.
Investing is something you learn. Down markets are better than up markets. Investing is a skill you pass down to your kids.
Money dies in 401k. The tax deduction and match do not make up for the negatives.
I started investing in 2020 and retired in 2025 using only Roth IRA and regular investment accounts.
DC came from public school and went straight to year two in college.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP - some of the things on that list are wishlists and I wanted to see what was realistic. No family financial help and mortgage is reasonable approx 2K. No credit card debt or car debt but will need a new car soon. Paid off huge student loans ourselves. Paid for our house down payment ourselves. Courthouse wedding.

We recently came into this income and I had thought it would bring us more. We live near a fancy private school and friends send their kids there, it made me sad to realize we cannot afford it. We also haven’t traveled internationally since our kids were born.

We were debating if we could afford a 300$ vacuum since ours broke and I realized …what does this income even mean for us, hence the reality check here.

If you make 320k and your mortgage is 2k and you can't afford a new vacuum something is very very wrong with your finances.

OP - About 80K is new income for the past few months since like March, this is new for us. And until recently a good chunk went to student loans.

What's your monthly take home? ~12k? 2k mortgage...that's 2,500 a week leftover. What are your childcare costs?

If you make 320, how is your take home only 144 (12/month)? That makes no sense.

Federal health insurance which is $$$$ for a family of four, pension stuff, and we’re both maxing out 401K for first time (and putting some in Roth 401K since March because we have no Roths).

Are you kidding me?

Seriously?

Just for kicks, let us know what insurance for 4 would be through the private employer.

OP - Probably not 848$ …that’s the cost of bcbs standard a month for a family of four.

[Anonymous]

We can do all that at about 3X your income. We do have a high mortgage now. When we made around what you made, we had a low mortgage, and lived comfortably, but we did not do private school or day care.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP - some of the things on that list are wishlists and I wanted to see what was realistic. No family financial help and mortgage is reasonable approx 2K. No credit card debt or car debt but will need a new car soon. Paid off huge student loans ourselves. Paid for our house down payment ourselves. Courthouse wedding.

We recently came into this income and I had thought it would bring us more. We live near a fancy private school and friends send their kids there, it made me sad to realize we cannot afford it. We also haven’t traveled internationally since our kids were born.

We were debating if we could afford a 300$ vacuum since ours broke and I realized …what does this income even mean for us, hence the reality check here.

If you make 320k and your mortgage is 2k and you can't afford a new vacuum something is very very wrong with your finances.

OP - About 80K is new income for the past few months since like March, this is new for us. And until recently a good chunk went to student loans.

What's your monthly take home? ~12k? 2k mortgage...that's 2,500 a week leftover. What are your childcare costs?

If you make 320, how is your take home only 144 (12/month)? That makes no sense.

Federal health insurance which is $$$$ for a family of four, pension stuff, and we’re both maxing out 401K for first time (and putting some in Roth 401K since March because we have no Roths).

Are you kidding me?

Seriously?

Just for kicks, let us know what insurance for 4 would be through the private employer.

OP - Probably not 848$ …that’s the cost of bcbs standard a month for a family of four.

We pay over $1500.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No to private
No to maxing out 401k
No to 529
Use the money to invest. The long term capital gains taxes are lower than ordinary income taxes. You will have enough to pay for college in cash for all kids.
Investing is something you learn. Down markets are better than up markets. Investing is a skill you pass down to your kids.
Money dies in 401k. The tax deduction and match do not make up for the negatives.
I started investing in 2020 and retired in 2025 using only Roth IRA and regular investment accounts.
DC came from public school and went straight to year two in college.

This person keeps posting this crap in almost every thread about finances.

My kid went to public and also went straight into junior year in college. They will have 3 STEM degrees in 4 years.

[Anonymous]

Similar HHI to you, including one fed who covers most of our insurance.

We both max 401k (and have for at least 8 years)
Contribute 1500/month to college savings (total for 2 kids)
We take a few driving vacations to visit relatives, usually one flying vacation, and usually one beach rental (driving) vacation yearly. Sometimes we do a weekend rental vacation and/or a few days away at an inexpensive hotel a few hours away using points.
Public school, but pay for aftercare/after school babysitter and summer camps (not overnight)
We eat out about 4-5x/month with the kids and usually have a date night once/month. Parents both buy lunch at work regularly.
Drive our paid-off car, but one parent takes metro to work.

We're comfortable and do not really worry about money thanks to a ~3k mortgage. There is no way we could afford private school. We would have to stop saving for college and retirement.

[Anonymous]

We make $300k with one kid and can do all of this expect private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on your mortgage - is it 2000 or 7000? That matters a LOT

+1

We need an accurate budget for fixed expenses:

mortgage
Insurance
car payments & insurance
medical costs
Groceries
Utlitilies
Cell Phones
etc....

Then we can help you figure out where to divert the remainder of you income

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP - some of the things on that list are wishlists and I wanted to see what was realistic. No family financial help and mortgage is reasonable approx 2K. No credit card debt or car debt but will need a new car soon. Paid off huge student loans ourselves. Paid for our house down payment ourselves. Courthouse wedding.

We recently came into this income and I had thought it would bring us more. We live near a fancy private school and friends send their kids there, it made me sad to realize we cannot afford it. We also haven’t traveled internationally since our kids were born.

We were debating if we could afford a 300$ vacuum since ours broke and I realized …what does this income even mean for us, hence the reality check here.

If you make 320k and your mortgage is 2k and you can't afford a new vacuum something is very very wrong with your finances.

OP - About 80K is new income for the past few months since like March, this is new for us. And until recently a good chunk went to student loans.

What's your monthly take home? ~12k? 2k mortgage...that's 2,500 a week leftover. What are your childcare costs?

OP yes about right, about 19K for daycare for one child, two years left. Other in public school. I spend around 600$/1000$ on something not for our family (will leave it to that).

I think the other poster who said intermittent vacations and no private school has it correct. It sucks. I thought this money would be life changing instead I barely get to save more in retirement or 529.

Are you American?

OP - how could you tell (I know how). I am not. Live in America but born and raised somewhere else.

I'm sorry the American dream we sell the world turned out to be a crock of shit. Sincerely.

No it's not!

However, $300K HHI is not enough to do "everything" especially in DCUM area. It's UMC+, but you are not sending 2 kids to privates at $40K per year per kid on that salary and certainly not while also taking lots of vacations and saving for college (so your kids wont have massive student loans)

But it's plenty to do almost all of that minus the expensive privates, if you plan/budget well

[Anonymous]

Skip private and you can consider for high school when your income may be higher. Travel internationally every few years, there’s lots of great family trips to be had in the US as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Similar HHI to you, including one fed who covers most of our insurance.

We both max 401k (and have for at least 8 years)
Contribute 1500/month to college savings (total for 2 kids)
We take a few driving vacations to visit relatives, usually one flying vacation, and usually one beach rental (driving) vacation yearly. Sometimes we do a weekend rental vacation and/or a few days away at an inexpensive hotel a few hours away using points.
Public school, but pay for aftercare/after school babysitter and summer camps (not overnight)
We eat out about 4-5x/month with the kids and usually have a date night once/month. Parents both buy lunch at work regularly.
Drive our paid-off car, but one parent takes metro to work.

We're comfortable and do not really worry about money thanks to a ~3k mortgage. There is no way we could afford private school. We would have to stop saving for college and retirement.

OP - do you have a house cleaner? I like the vacations where you are saving by driving. It’s been hard with the toddler but he’s better at driving long distances now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a 320K HHI (one is a fed salary so half of gross goes to pension and insurance etc).

Help me figure this out which of these can I reasonably expect to be able to do? Trying to get a reality check.

One international vacation
One child in private school
One child in daycare
Max out 401K
Max out 10K for 529
Max out IRA
Have a new Subaru car
Go out to eat at restaurants
Two stateside flights to visit family for holidays
Cleaners once a month
Organic groceries

Eliminate the private school, only go on an international trip every few years once the kids are older, pare down eating out to twice a month.

[Anonymous]

OP - again but isn’t that insane?! Pare down restaurants …on 320K?! I know it’s accurate but at what HHI do I not do this? I’ve done it all my life and I STILL have to do it with 320 THOUSAND income. At one point don’t I nickle and dime and scrimp credit card points because I have to? Anyway, vent over. Everyone is right here and this was helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - again but isn’t that insane?! Pare down restaurants …on 320K?! I know it’s accurate but at what HHI do I not do this? I’ve done it all my life and I STILL have to do it with 320 THOUSAND income. At one point don’t I nickle and dime and scrimp credit card points because I have to? Anyway, vent over. Everyone is right here and this was helpful.

You can do a lot more with your HHI if you lose the idea of private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - again but isn’t that insane?! Pare down restaurants …on 320K?! I know it’s accurate but at what HHI do I not do this? I’ve done it all my life and I STILL have to do it with 320 THOUSAND income. At one point don’t I nickle and dime and scrimp credit card points because I have to? Anyway, vent over. Everyone is right here and this was helpful.

Not your fault. The goalposts have moved and now you need $500k+ to maintain the lifestyle you want.