Push for academic vs push for sports

[Anonymous]

You can relax on this for a while.

Make sure he's doing well in school (since he seems capable) and getting enrichment as appropriate, AND make sure he's being physically active. A rec sport is fine!

It's high school when you often have to make "the" choice, but even that is only really a binary thing for kids who are strugglng or aiming for tippy top schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Physical activity is important and screen time is bad.

We were a big sports family but we also ended up with two D1 athletes on scholarship. It was a lot of work for our children and for us to manage their athletic training schedule. I don’t recommend getting on that treadmill.

Find an activity your child enjoys. I would suggest a team sport of some kind if possible. Being part of a team fosters accountability, camaraderie, commitment and dedication.

Limit screen time at all costs. Heck, I’d buy a kid a dirt bike these days before I bought a gaming system.

To play the devil's advocate, I think team sports are overrated. There are other ways to learn to be a part of a team that don't involve the heartbreak of being cut or sidelined, and that don't break the bank or suck up all your family time. My last kid does individual sports and they are so much easier logistically as we can pick and choose what we want to attend.

"Heartbreak"??? Ugh to that thinking! You know what else sports are good for? Giving kids the space and opportunity to fail. It's so important!

YES! Morgan Stuart of Defense Lessons had a great interview where she talked about sports being the safest place to fail. This is truer the less competitive the sport - so rec sports are safer for failing (by design) than club, and some clubs at least than school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the question? One of my kids is very gifted, and in elementary school, we don’t need to do anything extra. They read on their own, are adequately challenged in the gifted program, and take art classes. I don’t have to intervene much. However, I do push sports because I want them to be fit for life. They have gravitated towards sports that require less running, like golf and tennis, which is fine.

Pushing sports does not necessarily lead to fit for life. Not playing sports has nothing to do with who is active as an adult.

Is there a difference between gifted and Very gifted?

Playing sports doesn’t guarantee fitness for life, but it is self reinforcing. Competency and fitness in one skill leads to self confidence and ability to try another. Avoiding sports and activities lead to further avoidance.
That said, let them try a lot of different activities. It’s true that pushy parents lead to kids with problems.

Thanks to parents, especially GenX and boomers, children's sports have become all about money. Kids actually have to try out for teams at very young ages instead of just signing up. When previous generations were just starting these kids now are quitting in droves.

Before parents got overly involved kids would get together on to play games. A football was all that was needed to play their own version of the game. Basketball hoops were everywhere. As soon as the ice froze kids were there with their hockey pucks and sticks.

In middle school structured sports started, high school had try outs, top players were recruited and went on to play in college and professional. Today not too many kids get to be leaders and form teams to play in the park. There is always an adult there. It becomes drudgery and 70-80% quit sports by 12 or 13 years old.

Kids under 9 years old can get plenty of exercise with friends and family. Playgrounds are made for exercise. Families can bike ride to a field or park with a ball. Swimming, running around. Exercise is easy that young. In middle school it gets tougher to keep kids active and unfortunately that’s the time when the great majority of them quit organized sports. Burnt out at 12 years old. This organized sports at such a young age has been a massive failure.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These math enrichment programs are bigger rackets and wastes of time than travel sports.

When we stopped math enrichment, DD’s state math scores dropped by 20%. When she enrolled for school year enrichment or summer math camp, her scores shot back up to 99 percentile. It’s only a waste of time if they are getting enough math education at school. Many kids are not.

This. And math is so much more important now than it was 25 years ago - for most (not all) college degrees.

But you can do math enrichment at home in about 20 min per day. Thus allowing them to do other extracurriculars like sports and music too

DP. Other extracurriculars fit just fine around the 30 min sessions, twice a week, at the math center after school. On the other nights she does the math worksheets - which vary between 10-30/min each. None of that gets in the way of other activities.

Doing math at home also is fine - or even skipping it entirely if DC is lucky enough to be at a school that is effectively teaching math during class hours.