Unexcused absences, holidays and “chronic truancy” and how DC handles these issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you tell your kid's teachers in advance, offer to do any makeup work they want (but don't demand they prepare anything) and aren't generally a pain in the ass, there's a good chance they'll mark a couple of days as excused to avoid the letter. Just be upfront about the issue/don't lie. Our kids' teachers have always been willing to do it. (We take a family trip to my DH's country of origin every other year and miss about 8-10 days depending on the DCPS schedule for that year. The country is far away and so it's worth it for us. We've always been able to work with teachers to keep the unexcused year total under 10.)

No. Do not give teachers more work to accommodate your off-peak flight/vacation. You can buy a workbook from Target.

I don't even respond to those emails anymore. I just cc the social worker and let her do her thing.

Reading comprehension much? I specifically said not to ask them to prepare anything. My older kids' teachers have their homework ready well in advance and have always been happy to give it to us early. It's not a matter of me needing stuff for my kids to do, it's that I don't want my kids to get behind on work in a way that's a pain for their teachers. You must be at an UNW school if you think the school's social workers would care at all about this scenario. Our school's saintly overworked social worker would delete your message in a heartbeat.

"our teachers have always been willing to do it". Do what? because you are "honest" they just look the other way. You sound like a pain in the ass parent.
You are lucky you aren't in my class or at our school. Your out of boundary *ss would have been kicked out by now. Sounds like your saintly social worker should be fired for not doing their job.

Ever heard of Rashida Rudd from your little perch?

I’m not sure what you’re having trouble following. Our teachers have always been willing to mark a few days as excused even when we tell the truth about our plans in order to avoid hassle with the 10 day letter/CPS/etc. I’m also in the boundary of my school FWIW and have very good relationships with most of our teachers.

I’ve heard of Relisha Rudd, of course, but still think it is a waste of resources to go after families for missing 10 days, especially non-consecutively, when you know exactly where they are. We’d be totally happy to do a Teams call if that assuaged concerns — and in fact one of the kids did call into class to show the teacher and class something they’d learned about in school (at the teacher’s request) on our last trip.

Your travel plans should not be excused. What part of that do you not understand?

My advice was to OP who was explicitly asking how to deal with this issue. I offered a way that worked for us. You offered judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you tell your kid's teachers in advance, offer to do any makeup work they want (but don't demand they prepare anything) and aren't generally a pain in the ass, there's a good chance they'll mark a couple of days as excused to avoid the letter. Just be upfront about the issue/don't lie. Our kids' teachers have always been willing to do it. (We take a family trip to my DH's country of origin every other year and miss about 8-10 days depending on the DCPS schedule for that year. The country is far away and so it's worth it for us. We've always been able to work with teachers to keep the unexcused year total under 10.)

No. Do not give teachers more work to accommodate your off-peak flight/vacation. You can buy a workbook from Target.

I don't even respond to those emails anymore. I just cc the social worker and let her do her thing.

Reading comprehension much? I specifically said not to ask them to prepare anything. My older kids' teachers have their homework ready well in advance and have always been happy to give it to us early. It's not a matter of me needing stuff for my kids to do, it's that I don't want my kids to get behind on work in a way that's a pain for their teachers. You must be at an UNW school if you think the school's social workers would care at all about this scenario. Our school's saintly overworked social worker would delete your message in a heartbeat.

"our teachers have always been willing to do it". Do what? because you are "honest" they just look the other way. You sound like a pain in the ass parent.
You are lucky you aren't in my class or at our school. Your out of boundary *ss would have been kicked out by now. Sounds like your saintly social worker should be fired for not doing their job.

Ever heard of Rashida Rudd from your little perch?

I’m not sure what you’re having trouble following. Our teachers have always been willing to mark a few days as excused even when we tell the truth about our plans in order to avoid hassle with the 10 day letter/CPS/etc. I’m also in the boundary of my school FWIW and have very good relationships with most of our teachers.

I’ve heard of Relisha Rudd, of course, but still think it is a waste of resources to go after families for missing 10 days, especially non-consecutively, when you know exactly where they are. We’d be totally happy to do a Teams call if that assuaged concerns — and in fact one of the kids did call into class to show the teacher and class something they’d learned about in school (at the teacher’s request) on our last trip.

Your travel plans should not be excused. What part of that do you not understand?

My advice was to OP who was explicitly asking how to deal with this issue. I offered a way that worked for us. You offered judgment.

Not really judgment. It's an easy call requiring no particular discernment that your actions screw the teachers and, therefore, the other students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Public school has 180 days in session. Go on vacay during the other 185. Or homeschool. Or go private. Or go to online school.

1/2 the time spent in school in DC is a waste of time. If you have a high performing kid, that percentage goes up even more. The kid will get much more out of some trips then missing a few days of school.

Now if your kid is at the bottom of the class, well that is different situation altogether.

If you’re pulling your kids from class for multiple days in middle school, you’re contributing to their anxiety. I see kids crying before and after returning from abroad. Is your vacation more important than your kid’s mental health?

Oh my god, no parent should do this to their kid in middle school. My kids learns new information every day and then is tested on it.

Parents do this all the time in our well regarded HS. Kids miss a week of school for all sorts of reasons their parents deem more important than school. It’s their choice I guess but some kids come back incredibly stressed.

[Anonymous]

Spend more money, like most of us, and travel during school breaks. It is important to teach responsibility to your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Schools can (and are supposed to) refer you to cps after 10 unexcused absences. They rarely do, though, and even more rarely does cps do anything when it's only 10 non-consecutive days.

But I don't know why your child's absences are any more justified than other people's, just because you're not poor.

This is the key point.

Your child is missing school for reasons that are not excused. This means you get the same communications and deal with the same consequences as every other family whose child misses that much school.

You aren’t special; you’re making a choice to pull your child out for reasons that DCPS doesn’t consider valid. If you don’t want to deal with it, don’t take your kid out of school so much. It’s pretty simple.

Sure. I guess I am just wondering what the actual, real consequences are, realistically, for 10 days of non-consecutive unexcused absences. Like could I lose my OOB spot?

Also, what are some good excuses to use to get some days excused after the fact of missing a few days. I know that’s a morally ambiguous inquiry, but I’m okay with that. A doctor’s note excusing a few days would be great, but I wonder if I could even use the religious observance excuse, which seems like it would be a pretty broadly accepted excuse, especially since we’re in the US with so much religiosity. Pretty hard, legally, to argue with “firmly held beliefs”.

I think you're being kind of gross and would think less of you for it if I knew you. You need to understand that what happens is CPS may call you and tell you that school is important, but close out the case because your child is not actually being neglected or abused.

I think you could technically lose your OOB spot but probably they wouldn't bother. However if you act like an entitled PITA in other ways, that can subtly affect your experience. It seems like you're treating school like a daycare where you can come and go as you please, and teachers resent that because it's disrespectful and it's more work for them to catch your kid up.

I’m sorry but with a chance for my kid to see Bratislava for 4 days vs. miss a few days of school, I think it’s okay. You can pass moral judgments. It’s not as they matter to me because you have no impact on my life.

No one is judging you for your choice to take your kid out of school. We're judging you for lying in order to avoid the consequences.

That. Take him out, and deal with whatever comes of it. Making up excuses and lying is disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Schools can (and are supposed to) refer you to cps after 10 unexcused absences. They rarely do, though, and even more rarely does cps do anything when it's only 10 non-consecutive days.

But I don't know why your child's absences are any more justified than other people's, just because you're not poor.

This is the key point.

Your child is missing school for reasons that are not excused. This means you get the same communications and deal with the same consequences as every other family whose child misses that much school.

You aren’t special; you’re making a choice to pull your child out for reasons that DCPS doesn’t consider valid. If you don’t want to deal with it, don’t take your kid out of school so much. It’s pretty simple.

Sure. I guess I am just wondering what the actual, real consequences are, realistically, for 10 days of non-consecutive unexcused absences. Like could I lose my OOB spot?

Also, what are some good excuses to use to get some days excused after the fact of missing a few days. I know that’s a morally ambiguous inquiry, but I’m okay with that. A doctor’s note excusing a few days would be great, but I wonder if I could even use the religious observance excuse, which seems like it would be a pretty broadly accepted excuse, especially since we’re in the US with so much religiosity. Pretty hard, legally, to argue with “firmly held beliefs”.

I think you're being kind of gross and would think less of you for it if I knew you. You need to understand that what happens is CPS may call you and tell you that school is important, but close out the case because your child is not actually being neglected or abused.

I think you could technically lose your OOB spot but probably they wouldn't bother. However if you act like an entitled PITA in other ways, that can subtly affect your experience. It seems like you're treating school like a daycare where you can come and go as you please, and teachers resent that because it's disrespectful and it's more work for them to catch your kid up.

I’m sorry but with a chance for my kid to see Bratislava for 4 days vs. miss a few days of school, I think it’s okay. You can pass moral judgments. It’s not as they matter to me because you have no impact on my life.

No one is judging you for your choice to take your kid out of school. We're judging you for lying in order to avoid the consequences.

I am. It makes life more difficult for teachers and disrupts the rest of the class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Schools can (and are supposed to) refer you to cps after 10 unexcused absences. They rarely do, though, and even more rarely does cps do anything when it's only 10 non-consecutive days.

But I don't know why your child's absences are any more justified than other people's, just because you're not poor.

This is the key point.

Your child is missing school for reasons that are not excused. This means you get the same communications and deal with the same consequences as every other family whose child misses that much school.

You aren’t special; you’re making a choice to pull your child out for reasons that DCPS doesn’t consider valid. If you don’t want to deal with it, don’t take your kid out of school so much. It’s pretty simple.

Sure. I guess I am just wondering what the actual, real consequences are, realistically, for 10 days of non-consecutive unexcused absences. Like could I lose my OOB spot?

Also, what are some good excuses to use to get some days excused after the fact of missing a few days. I know that’s a morally ambiguous inquiry, but I’m okay with that. A doctor’s note excusing a few days would be great, but I wonder if I could even use the religious observance excuse, which seems like it would be a pretty broadly accepted excuse, especially since we’re in the US with so much religiosity. Pretty hard, legally, to argue with “firmly held beliefs”.

I think you're being kind of gross and would think less of you for it if I knew you. You need to understand that what happens is CPS may call you and tell you that school is important, but close out the case because your child is not actually being neglected or abused.

I think you could technically lose your OOB spot but probably they wouldn't bother. However if you act like an entitled PITA in other ways, that can subtly affect your experience. It seems like you're treating school like a daycare where you can come and go as you please, and teachers resent that because it's disrespectful and it's more work for them to catch your kid up.

I’m sorry but with a chance for my kid to see Bratislava for 4 days vs. miss a few days of school, I think it’s okay. You can pass moral judgments. It’s not as they matter to me because you have no impact on my life.

Bratislava FFS?

Look, you asked and people are answering. The consequences of making the school staff think you're an entitled liar are subtle but real. That's the consequence. You may care, you may not, you may not even connect the dots when it happens. But it's real. That is the answer to the question you asked.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you tell your kid's teachers in advance, offer to do any makeup work they want (but don't demand they prepare anything) and aren't generally a pain in the ass, there's a good chance they'll mark a couple of days as excused to avoid the letter. Just be upfront about the issue/don't lie. Our kids' teachers have always been willing to do it. (We take a family trip to my DH's country of origin every other year and miss about 8-10 days depending on the DCPS schedule for that year. The country is far away and so it's worth it for us. We've always been able to work with teachers to keep the unexcused year total under 10.)

No. Do not give teachers more work to accommodate your off-peak flight/vacation. You can buy a workbook from Target.

I don't even respond to those emails anymore. I just cc the social worker and let her do her thing.

Reading comprehension much? I specifically said not to ask them to prepare anything. My older kids' teachers have their homework ready well in advance and have always been happy to give it to us early. It's not a matter of me needing stuff for my kids to do, it's that I don't want my kids to get behind on work in a way that's a pain for their teachers. You must be at an UNW school if you think the school's social workers would care at all about this scenario. Our school's saintly overworked social worker would delete your message in a heartbeat.

"our teachers have always been willing to do it". Do what? because you are "honest" they just look the other way. You sound like a pain in the ass parent.
You are lucky you aren't in my class or at our school. Your out of boundary *ss would have been kicked out by now. Sounds like your saintly social worker should be fired for not doing their job.

Ever heard of Rashida Rudd from your little perch?

I’m not sure what you’re having trouble following. Our teachers have always been willing to mark a few days as excused even when we tell the truth about our plans in order to avoid hassle with the 10 day letter/CPS/etc. I’m also in the boundary of my school FWIW and have very good relationships with most of our teachers.

I’ve heard of Relisha Rudd, of course, but still think it is a waste of resources to go after families for missing 10 days, especially non-consecutively, when you know exactly where they are. We’d be totally happy to do a Teams call if that assuaged concerns — and in fact one of the kids did call into class to show the teacher and class something they’d learned about in school (at the teacher’s request) on our last trip.

Your travel plans should not be excused. What part of that do you not understand?

My advice was to OP who was explicitly asking how to deal with this issue. I offered a way that worked for us. You offered judgment.

How could I not? You and the OP are lying and suggesting teachers lie for you.

When I get an email “we are traveling to my husbands home country to celebrate his fathers birthday, can you please give us work for my darling child”

I say “safe travels.”. I do go out of my way to send class work. Nor do I mark the child excused. Because I could lose my job.

[Anonymous]

If they are missing two days or just one day, I'd just send a note in the morning they were running a fever and were staying home for the day. I mean the pearl clutchers here might drone about "thinking less of you" but come on. Not a big deal.

It gets harder with more days off at a time. No one is going to give you permission - it's not like you can go into school and get a wink wink nudge nudge sure we get it kind of agreement.

[Anonymous]

You absolutely can lose your OOB.

You are creating an administrative burden on the school by not attending and it is disruptive to the classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Public school has 180 days in session. Go on vacay during the other 185. Or homeschool. Or go private. Or go to online school.

1/2 the time spent in school in DC is a waste of time. If you have a high performing kid, that percentage goes up even more. The kid will get much more out of some trips then missing a few days of school.

Now if your kid is at the bottom of the class, well that is different situation altogether.

If you’re pulling your kids from class for multiple days in middle school, you’re contributing to their anxiety. I see kids crying before and after returning from abroad. Is your vacation more important than your kid’s mental health?

Oh my god, no parent should do this to their kid in middle school. My kids learns new information every day and then is tested on it.

Parents do this all the time in our well regarded HS. Kids miss a week of school for all sorts of reasons their parents deem more important than school. It’s their choice I guess but some kids come back incredibly stressed.

This is very real; I teach upper elementary and see it all the time. Many kids put stress on themselves when they miss school, parents ask for work they can take.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Public school has 180 days in session. Go on vacay during the other 185. Or homeschool. Or go private. Or go to online school.

1/2 the time spent in school in DC is a waste of time. If you have a high performing kid, that percentage goes up even more. The kid will get much more out of some trips then missing a few days of school.

Now if your kid is at the bottom of the class, well that is different situation altogether.

If you’re pulling your kids from class for multiple days in middle school, you’re contributing to their anxiety. I see kids crying before and after returning from abroad. Is your vacation more important than your kid’s mental health?

I’m the PP and i’m talking about elementary school which is OP’s question. NBD. Do it now before middle school when it will be harder.

BTW, I know my laid back kid, who had no issues coming back from trip. Will we travel as much in middle? No and that is why I’m telling OP to do it now in elementary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you tell your kid's teachers in advance, offer to do any makeup work they want (but don't demand they prepare anything) and aren't generally a pain in the ass, there's a good chance they'll mark a couple of days as excused to avoid the letter. Just be upfront about the issue/don't lie. Our kids' teachers have always been willing to do it. (We take a family trip to my DH's country of origin every other year and miss about 8-10 days depending on the DCPS schedule for that year. The country is far away and so it's worth it for us. We've always been able to work with teachers to keep the unexcused year total under 10.)

No. Do not give teachers more work to accommodate your off-peak flight/vacation. You can buy a workbook from Target.

I don't even respond to those emails anymore. I just cc the social worker and let her do her thing.

Reading comprehension much? I specifically said not to ask them to prepare anything. My older kids' teachers have their homework ready well in advance and have always been happy to give it to us early. It's not a matter of me needing stuff for my kids to do, it's that I don't want my kids to get behind on work in a way that's a pain for their teachers. You must be at an UNW school if you think the school's social workers would care at all about this scenario. Our school's saintly overworked social worker would delete your message in a heartbeat.

"our teachers have always been willing to do it". Do what? because you are "honest" they just look the other way. You sound like a pain in the ass parent.
You are lucky you aren't in my class or at our school. Your out of boundary *ss would have been kicked out by now. Sounds like your saintly social worker should be fired for not doing their job.

Ever heard of Rashida Rudd from your little perch?

I’m not sure what you’re having trouble following. Our teachers have always been willing to mark a few days as excused even when we tell the truth about our plans in order to avoid hassle with the 10 day letter/CPS/etc. I’m also in the boundary of my school FWIW and have very good relationships with most of our teachers.

I’ve heard of Relisha Rudd, of course, but still think it is a waste of resources to go after families for missing 10 days, especially non-consecutively, when you know exactly where they are. We’d be totally happy to do a Teams call if that assuaged concerns — and in fact one of the kids did call into class to show the teacher and class something they’d learned about in school (at the teacher’s request) on our last trip.

I would be very upset if my child's teacher allowed this to happen. How could a teacher think it's appropriate to flaunt another family's wealth and complete disregard for school attendance in front of the whole class?

[Anonymous]

Yes, I got those letters (multiple all year!) when my kid missed a week of school for Covid. This was in 2022 when we were still testing to return after break! Asinine! DCPS would not let him back until he had a negative test but yet they kept harassing me all year for it.

[Anonymous]

Nobody really cares. CPS has to act like it cares but you don’t even have to answer the phone. Short of a court order they can’t do anything. Carry on.