DD was refused a letter of recommendation based on something dumb

[Anonymous]

I don't think that's a dumb reason.

[Anonymous]

If this was a national level competition, missing school is unavoidable as scheduling is set by a national federation and results/points often affect national ranking and championship eligibility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If this was a national level competition, missing school is unavoidable as scheduling is set by a national federation and results/points often affect national ranking and championship eligibility.

Sure, but it’s still an issue of excessive absences. If the teacher doesn’t have something strong to write in the letter, then this isn’t a letter that should be sent to colleges. The teacher did a favor by saying no.

[Anonymous]

I am confused by the timing. It's November. It's too early to ask a junior teacher and way to late to ask a senior one. Unless your kid had asked someone else and then something happened (e.g. teacher died), the fact that it's November is plenty of reason for a teacher to turn down a request.

[Anonymous]

The teacher can say no, and I think your daughters absences are not a "dumb issue" for the teacher. If you kid was applying CS and really needed the rec, then maybe she shouldn't have missed for xxxxxxx excuses. Have the math teacher do it, I don't think the recs actually matter unless they are along the lines of "this is the most exceptional kid I have ever taught" or "do not admit this kid is a mess" and I doubt your daughter is in either bank.

[Anonymous]

Of course it's fair. You and she prioritized travel and sports over this class. The teacher doesn't have a good impression of your child's commitment to learning or to the subject. They don't recommend your child for this selective spot and believe it is more fair air someone else who has worked harder to earn it.

One thing teachers till have the autonomy to do is refuse to recommend someone that we simply...don't recommend. It's not unfair. These are opinions and the teacher has good reasons for hers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If this was a national level competition, missing school is unavoidable as scheduling is set by a national federation and results/points often affect national ranking and championship eligibility.

Sure, but it’s still an issue of excessive absences. If the teacher doesn’t have something strong to write in the letter, then this isn’t a letter that should be sent to colleges. The teacher did a favor by saying no.

I agree. Students need to learn how to build rapport with teachers. I mentioned the pp because some parents may not understand how it's often annoying for kids that they have to travel during the school year and miss classes, especially if they're taking a bunch of AP or IB classes. National schedules often are aligned so that the champions can represent the U.S. in international competitions, the dates of which are set by international sports federations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teachers are really nasty at times and quite full of themselves. They never want to encourage/help kids and it is really sad. Writing that letter would not have hurt the teacher. Have come across some really nasty teachers in DDs school as well

I spent over an hour on each personalized recommendation I ever wrote. That was often over 100 hours a year, completely unpaid. That was on top of 20+ hours of unpaid overtime a week.

Why should the teacher spend an hour or more of her own time lying in a letter to say she recommended your child for a spot when she does NOT recommend your child? Other children are more deserving. Tell your kid to work or try harder. Or maybe display a modicum of respect or decency toward the hard work of teachers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD asked her AP Computer Science Principles teacher (from last year) to write her a letter of recommendation. She is applying to very selective colleges as a computer science major, so as you can imagine, this letter would have been an important part of her application.

However, the teacher said she would not be willing to write it since DD missed class a lot last year. Due to a combination of her sport, a family emergency, and travel, DD missed a significant amount of school in her junior year, but all her absences were excused and she explained this to the teacher. I'm really surprised the teacher would act like this- we are at a large public (not magnet). DD got an A in the class and is obviously passionate about the subject, and thought the teacher liked her. It's really surprising, and not fair.

DD was counting on this letter, and she doesn't know who to ask and what to do. Any advice? She is getting a letter from her AP Comp teacher as well, but it won't be strong since that's not her favorite subject.

She does not want that letter. The teacher is telling her it would be bad if she wrote it. The teacher is being fair to let her know in advance. We know teachers who write honest recs and do not warn students they won't be positive.
Ask a Math or Physics teacher.
The best recommendations are not necessarily from courses they got an A in nor courses for their major: my DC got an amazing letter(they sent it to her after admissions) that was in a very hard STEM AP, and they were applying with a humanities interest/intended major. They pulled their grade up to an A- after struggling with low Bs first quarter then ending with As: the teacher went on and on about the impressive grit, ownership, and the best comeback the teacher had seen. It was DC's least favorite subject and yet they still worked hard. DC is at a T10. We know that rec (and another great one) were the key. Find teachers who think your kid is amazing and engaged. Recs matter a LOT, especially for top schools and competitive programs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teachers are really nasty at times and quite full of themselves. They never want to encourage/help kids and it is really sad. Writing that letter would not have hurt the teacher. Have come across some really nasty teachers in DDs school as well

They also are overworked and undervalued. Good for this teacher for setting boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am confused by the timing. It's November. It's too early to ask a junior teacher and way to late to ask a senior one. Unless your kid had asked someone else and then something happened (e.g. teacher died), the fact that it's November is plenty of reason for a teacher to turn down a request.

our public has letter asking start in September and go through Dec 5th (for the jan deadlines). juniors are not allowed to ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“Travel” isn’t a valid reason to miss class as a junior in high school. I wouldn’t recommend her either.

"Travel" isn't a valid reason to miss school ever. I'm with the teacher on this. And if you try to strong-arm the teacher into giving a recommendation, the recommendation won't be good.

[Anonymous]

Travel?!?! Give us all a break.
Or at least those of us who visit our families or go to the beach when school isn’t in session.


Deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Her absences were excused but the teacher probably wasn’t happy that sports and a vacation took priority over her education.

Exactly. You don’t have a right to treat high school as the lowest priority and then get upset when people call you out on it.

Hmmm, I'm not sure missing some school for other things means it is the 'lowest' priority. I mean, the kid still studied enough to get an A and presumably attended most of the year.

Hmm again. Missing the class means it's not that important to her. "I can get an A in your (stupid) class without even being there." Disrespectful to the teacher and to other students. I don't see why she would even expect a good letter from the teacher.

If MCPS, she could have had a 89.5 during one quarter and a 79.5 the second quarter and get an A in this teacher's class. Let's be honest about what As mean today.

oh yikes our school is 93.5 for an A or 4.0. 89.5 to 93.4 is a 3.7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Should be trying to get letters from core teachers anyway. Math teacher rec is essential for computer science major.

+1 compSci is a bad choice